Feeling anxious. 4 yo staying at nursery in Sep

[Moonandstar5]

Hi all,

Due to a breakdown of my relationship with a very selfish ex, I’m now saying with family, waiting for council housing and wanting my DS to get into reception place. It’s really horrible feeling.6mo ago I had it all figured out. I applied for reception places and found out the offer for schools. Now, no permanent home, no school in place. My DS goes to private nursery only with the help of UC for fees it’s so expensive. Everyone is asking me what school he’s going to and it breaks my heart because I don’t know yet. I don’t even know where I’m moving into. The good thing is his current nursery is very understanding and helps him a lot. I just don’t even know about the 30hrs funding situation. I might have to pay full whack. It’s really hurting me. Any advice or words of comfort? Has anyone been in a similar situation? I hope not. It’s a very weird and horrible feeling. And the guilt is driving me crazy. I want the best for him but I feel I’ve failed him massively. 😔

I mean this in the nicest possible way but why have you decided to keep him in nursery rather than start him at school and move his school when you know where you're going? He's compulsory school age this school year so I don't think you'll get funding. You'll also be putting him behind in his learning as he'll be starting school later in the school year and there really isn't a lot of time to catch up. Is it too late to get him back into the school you were offered in April if your family are in the same area?

This. Lots of kids move schools during reception. Some because they got a place at a preferred school, some because they moved house etc.

Get your child into school and worry about the rest later

We don't know when he was 4, so don't know if he is off compulsory school age yet. If he's not, then he will get the 30hrs funding.

Saying that, I also have no idea why the OP doesn't just send him to school.

Hi @TeddyBeans I understand what you’re saying. That was my thought. Where I’m staying with family is about a 30mintir journey and outside of the borough that we were originally staying in. I couldn’t afford to stay there. My family helped me out. I thought I might get some temporary accommodation within a few weeks but it’s been a few months. I had to make this decision just recently. If I were to apply for a close nursery near my parents home to start Sep and the council said they have a property 45minutes away in 2 months, I would have to move schools again. It’s not an easy situation. It’s very complicated. That’s why the guilt is eating at me cos I know it’s a very big step from nursery to reception academically and life wise. im even doubting whether I’m doing the right thing.

Putting him in a school and moving him when you find somewhere to live is much better than your current plan. You could be waiting months/years for a council house - what would you do then

They continue to get the funding usually the first term of reception don’t they? I only know that from working in a private prep school, some parents were still using it towards the fees in reception.
And you don’t have to start him at school until the term after he turns 5 I believe.

Keep him in nursery, won’t do him any harm!

@Moonandstar5 you can apply for an in year move at any point. When I worked at a school we had a child move to a different school within days of starting because a place had opened up at her parents preferred school. Kids are so resilient that starting a new school soon after starting another one probably won't cause too much stress. Obviously you know your son best but like @HelloAllll says, you don't know how long it's going to take to be housed.

Personally, I'd get in contact with the local schools and see who has spaces. Just so you know what your options are

I agree with this.
Schools all run to relatively similar systems. Get him in a school, and ten im to move as and when.

Probably better to start at a school in September. Then if he has to move school, it will be a case of having learned a slightly different set of letters to the children in his new class (or slightly more/less), rather than not knowing any.

Hi. my 4yo will be going to reception next year (at age 5), so will staying in nursery a year longer. Im not sure of your childs birthday but have a look at flexible school admissions for summer born children. It basically gives you the right if you feel your child isn't ready for school to delay there school start until they are 5. (If born between April to end of August).
However i should stress you need to get the approval of the head teacher of the school you want your child to go to. If it's not agreed then when you apply next year they will go to yr1 and not reception. You have I believe until first week Oct to get this in writing.
If you know the general area you will be going to I would start writing to all the schools you'd consider and get as many yes's as you can now then next year when applying you only apply to those yes schools. Then in the meantime your child can go to nursery. And yes you auto get nursery funding until age 5.

You can however start them in reception in a local school and then move them in term to a new school if your new home is too far. My (shy) elder child last year started her school in November in reception class and settled really well. Wouldn't know now she wasn't there from September.

I'm happy to help/answer any questions on the flexible admission if that applies to your child.

If and when you move you'll have to change the setting your son is in. That's the reality for everyone.
That you would hold him back a year because of this beggars belief, really?! As an aside, do you really imagine you'll be offered a council property within a couple of months?
Rent somewhere and put him in school.