Party invite etiquette

[ht916178]

What's the etiquette for chasing up responses for party invites?

DD (just finished year 1) gave out invites on Thursday and since I've had 4 replies out of 11. School broke up for holidays on Friday.

I know I'm in the minority in that I'm very organised and as soon as I get an invite for DD I check the calender and reply.

The party is 3 weeks away but I'd quite like to get buying and planning and I'd just assumed people would have replied by now as they'd have surely seen the invite that had been bought home.

Did you ask people to RSVP by a particular date?

Some will be still in school bags with the artwork the kids took home
Some parents can't plan 3 weeks ahead

ALWAYS write "rsvp by XX date"

Do you have a class whatsapp?

Around us party invites are mainly by WhatsApp. You create a group with the invited children’s families on and people tend to reply via that fairly promptly. And you can politely chase with a single message to the group reminding people. I can imagine that at the end of the term many invites will be at the bottom of bags, mixed in with schoolwork brought home and forgotten or never been seen. If you have peoples numbers you could at least send a “worried dd’s invites might have got lost, just checking you had a party details” kind of message, even if you don’t want to set up a group.

No, I didn't put a rsvp date on, I'll remember that for next time.

We do have a yr1 WhatsApp but I've no idea if the children's adults are in that group so it would have to be a group message along the lines of "are x x x & y's parents in here?" But is it too early to be doing that?

It's a bit early, yes. I'd give them at least a week.

Lots will be among the artwork/work and general shit kids bring home. I Learned very quick never give out invites at the last week of a term !

All the work they had accumulated over the year got sent home with them on the Tuesday so it wouldn't have been amongst all of that.

Maybe I'll give them till middle of next week then and then start messaging.

TBH I rarely ever notice an invite left in my dc bag. I always respond via email or phone when receiving this way. But I have missed invites in bags many times....luckily the parent usually asks me when they see me and I am able to say I did not receive it and ill check the bag etc.

this happened all DDs childhood - August birthday peril!

Would send invitations - clearly marked with RSVP dates - I'd get one or two immediately to tell me no as they were on holiday - then nothing from the rest of them... never any idea how many would come. Nightmare - ended up doing birthday parties in September instead.

This is why my august DS has his party on the last day of term. People are on holiday in August/ don’t empty bags when no rush for homework/ mean to reply but with so much time to do it in forget/ can’t be chased up in the playground. Even those who RSVPed yes often forget by August.
if you can track down parents on WhatsApp, do it now! Then gently remind by checking they can still come a couple of days before.

Getting 4 replies out of 11 is pretty good at this stage. I'd leave it a week and then find the other parents on the class whatsapp and message them privately.
I gave up with paper invitations very quickly as I found half of them never made it home in book bags. WhatsApp or text is definitely easier if you have everyone's numbers.

It’s the August birthday problem. My DD had children forget to come after they had said “yes”. Obviously their parents found other things to do.

We moved to before term broke up. September was a long wait! If you don’t have individual emails or phone numbers you will have to send WhatsApp if you have a class one.

Can't you click on the 'Group Info' to see who is in the WhatsApp group? Doesn't help if all you know is that Mum is called 'Ellie' or whatever and there are three of them, though, I suppose, bit their posts might mention their DC's name?