Help Needed Deciding What To Do About Schools

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Hi, I really need some advice.

My 4 your DD has been attending a nursery attached to a private school since 2. She goes full time and loves it. The school is lovely, and they really nurture each child. I’m a single parent and pretty much have been from the start. The school is in an affluent area with unaffordable house prices.

At the start this year I bought a house in a different town (I was renting before) within a catchment area to some outstanding primary schools. The plan was for DD to continue to attend her current nursery till September and start reception at a state school near our new house. However, we were offered a place at a school rated inadequate by Ofsted. I launched an appeal with the council and put her on a waiting list.

I also asked the private school for financial help and surprisingly, was offered a substantial bursary. In the meantime, the council informed me the reception class is limited to 30 and is unlikely the appeal will be upheld so I accepted the bursary, cancelled the appeal, and asked them to remove DD from their waiting lists.

Last week we bought some very expensive uniform and DD is all excited about staying on and starting reception with her friends.

However, yesterday, completely out of blue, I received an email from the council saying that a place became available at our preferred school and if we want it. The school is rated outstanding by Ofsted and it’s only a short walk from the house, where the other school is 20 minutes’ drive away.

I have no idea what to do. I can just about afford the fees but I’m worried about the rising cost of living. Also, my mortgage is currently fixed till 2024 but I reckon by then, the interest will much higher, and the mortgage repayments could well be double.

But I don’t want to deny DD this amazing opportunity and she really loves her current school. Please help.

Honestly, I think you've been really lucky and it would be foolish to turn down the state school place in these circumstances.

Agreed. Plus don't forget the private school will have longer holidays which will mean more money spent on holiday childcare.

Thank you all. We are going to look around the state school on Monday morning. I'm struggling to think with my head and feeling pretty emotional about it all.

Not having to worry about paying fees would be a big weight off my shoulders and ultimately would make me a better, happier parent. However, I also know I can pay the fees if needed but I would have to take on more work and no one knows what the future will look like with everything that is going on.

State school all the way.

You can then save the money you'd be spending on fees to put towards secondary school if you want.

She will be fine with the change of plan and being close to school is such an advantage for everyone.

State primary close to your house.
They'll be able to give the bursary to someone else who needs it.

If you think she'd do well at the state school, that's the better option.

Echoing the state school clamour! Petrol prices are only going one way, so driving 40 minutes a day when you could walk to school seems financially (and environmentally) better.

My parents sent my brother and me to private school from 4 - they told us not to do it unless we could manage it "easily" as it is such a strain. If the state school is good and you like it, I would send her there, and you can always use the money you aren't spending on fees on the 'enrichment' that the private offers, but the state may not.

We've done that with our 4 - even with 4x music, sports clubs, riding, fencing subs etc, we haven't spent anywhere near 4x private fees!

Review the primary school properly. In particular pay attention to the headteacher and assess (as best you can) what you think their next 5 years looks like. When was the Ofsted rating given? Do the children go on to a grammar catchment (ie is there lots of tutoring at home for some families?)

If the Ofsted is recent, the school feels happy and secure and the head doesn’t look like they are about to retire/super ambitious wants to become an inspector or manage a chain of academies in the next two minutes then you might be wise to save your money for secondary.

I really feel for you as I'm sure it seems like a huge decision to make at such short notice. I am in a very similar position to you, single Mother, recently had to make the decision to move DS from private nursery class to an outstanding state school. It is hard not to be affected by the emotional impact of taking them out of somewhere where they are thriving but you have to steel yourself and just list the pros and cons. The big decider for me was that we could move back to the private school if needs be (hopefully not). But not the other way round. Once you have turned down your place at an oversubscribed outstanding state school you are not likely to get it back. I am having a tough and slightly tearful 'last week' at current school but feel I have made the right decision to move.