Should I move DS to private prep school and lose state secondary place (East Herts)?

[Baubles9877]

I really want to move my DS (Reception) away from our village primary as it's not great educationally. We have been continually disappointed by experience with my DD (year 4), not helped by Covid. Plus staffing at the school is unstable. Also due to poor behaviour management for boys I really want to move my son away now.
DD is very settled so we are supplementing with tutoring rather than disrupting her. Also we aren't sure she will catch up in time for entrance exams.

Has anyone got any experience or advice to share please?

DS will lose access to local state secondaries as it's a feeder school system around here (villages around Bishops Stortford). If DD goes to local state school she could get him in on sibling rule, but we shouldn't rely on that. Plus we will happily consider independent for either if it suits best.

Slim chances to get into state options via aptitude tests (music / language / sport) as about 9 places per year for a huge area.

This means we will have to get him into an independent secondary, all because we don't like our village primary school. Is this way too risky? He is bright and will be well supported, but I have no idea of the chances.
Local options are Haileybury, Bishops Stortford College and Felsted. We don't want to send to a boarding school further away.

Don't really want to risk another state primary as they are very small and tend not to offer wraparound care, same issues with class sizes etc.. Also in-year spaces are like gold dust.

We really think he will have a much better experience all round at a prep school we have chosen and their destination schools are very strong (some aptitude places at state plus the independents).

Local state schools are generally excellent but we don't like our local one quite so much. So it seems silly to continue in a primary school we don't like for 6 years just to get into a state school that's not our favourite option!!

Am I mad to risk his local secondary school place just for the sake of primary?

Can't you find a better primary school?

I'm bewildered that if you put him in the private system when he's five he can't go to the state secondary schools , presumably because with the admissions policy they would be full and he would be at the back of the queue.

Scooby Grew:
Around here most primaries are very full and people have to wait quite a long time for places to come up. Plus I can't do 2 school runs to different primaries with the same start time. Private offer much more flexible start and end pick ups.
It's very over-populated and class sizes can be too big (DDs was 32).

The state secondary admission policies are all about local feeder schools - I've been through with a fine toothcomb. They are filled with these and never get to the distance rule at the bottom of the list!!

I should add I am quite happy to send to the prep school. There is an issue with unfairness for my DD but she's really happy in her friend group so wouldn't want to move.

My anxiety is around how likely we are to get an independent secondary school place - how hard are these to get into? If he doesn't pass we could end up with an awful state place in a different town. Don't want to screw up his future, it's a rock and a hard place.

Other option is we just move areas completely and put them both in an independent through school. This is a viable option if we could find somewhere that suits all the family. It's just a lot to decide upon!

I'd at least try for one of the other state schools and perhaps put him on the waiting lists in case a place comes up as it seems really drastic to put him in a private school from reception to year twelve when you have two dc and you are only going to do this for one of them.

I could perhaps understand you considering this if there had been some sort of incident.

They are going to end up with quite different educational experiences, especially as you say you are only doing it because of the experience of your other child, not the child you want to put in the private school.

People manage different drop offs and pick ups by using after school and breakfast clubs or childminders rather than spending thousands and thousands of pounds on private schools.

He’s the same age as my daughter. I don’t know if this was the same everywhere but there was a really low birth rate that year at least around here. I don’t know a single person who didn’t get their first choice school place. It’s worth enquiring at any other state schools you would consider as to whether they have any space first of all. Also given the lower birth rate then perhaps competition for state school places won’t be as fierce.

I guess if he’s going to have a poor educational experience there then I can see a case for removing him so he has a good foundation. However I can see the conundrum, is it Hockerill you want him to go to?

Thanks so much for the replies. I'm just tying myself in complicated knots!

So he has had a bad experience with behaviour in his class since September and was poorly handled by the school. It's impacted him emotionally and we are following up with the head and seeing what happens. But we know that it's a common issue at the school and we know that educationally it's not going to be ideal for him - same issues as my daughter as the staffing and aspiration just isn't right.

We wish we'd moved them both to independent earlier to be honest - the education stuff became more apparent during Covid. Our preference is for independent secondary anyway... However it's just the riskiness of it all without being in a 'through' independent school from the start.

We used a childminder previously but she retired and there is a gap for this in our village. Current school has no breakfast club and after school club is full... so can't rely on making practicalities work... hence the switch to private. We have always debated this anyway and our experiences with DS are just the final straw!

I think that's good advice above - consider favourite state primaries and get on the lists as you never know what might happen.

Phos - lots of building work in the area so hundreds of new families which will cause issues whatever the birth rate.
Hockerill is just secondary so we are looking at Howe Green House for a prep school. And then we have a choice of independent secondaries.

Why do you not send him to a prep and be realistic about senior schools? Ditch the state schools. You shouldn’t base what your DC will achieve based on other DC’s destinations though. Your DC are not other peoples DC.

Through schools can be claustrophobic for all those years. Nothing to aspire to. Easy route to 6th form though. What you want at 5 isn’t necessarily what they need at 15!

If your preference is for independent secondary, then I'm not sure what the issue is? That you won't have your preferred state as a fallback? If your finances change drastically, you can always look to move your DC back to a less popular (i.e. one with places) feeder primary school in Year 5 or Year 6 (loads of people do that round here where we have the same system of you really need to be at a feeder primary to get to a particular secondary). However, you might also find that school positions will change over the next few years. The school my DC currently go to used to be impossible to get into if you didn't go to a feeder primary, but over time as the local population has got older, there are fewer students looking for places and they now even take the odd out of catchment child.

Understand this is a very old post, but curious what you did? In a similar position currently!