Transfer to Highgate at 7+ or 11+?

[munchymoo]

DS1 is 6 and at an excellent state primary where he is happy and settled with a good friendship base. He is a bright, academic boy who loves learning. We have 2 other children, a 2 year old DS and 1 year old DD.

Owing to finances and having 3 children, our plan was always to do state primary then move to independent secondary at 11+, expecting to do quite a lot of tutoring etc to get him in. We live locally to and love the idea of Highgate, but also could consider UCS, not looked further at other options YET.

Recently a friend suggested it may be better to try to get DS into Highgate at 7+ rather than 11+ as slightly less competitive, she suggested that then it will be easier for siblings to get it so it may safeguard their entry. On speaking to Highgate the other day they said they don't have a sibling policy though!

I've looked at the 7+ exam and DS isn't doing anything near this level at school yet (in year 1). He's a bright boy and I think he may not be being stretched to his full potential. He's also started coming home speaking fairly badly with slang and swearing which I know is probably the norm but as snobby as this sounds (and I know it does), I just don't like this side of things from the state school he's at.

We are really torn as to what to do. Do we stick to plan A and keep him where he is and get him to sit 11+, but if he doesn't get in that will be a bit rubbish! Or do we get him to do 7+ but then IF he gets in we need to move him from a school where he is genuinely happy and settled ,albeit perhaps not achieving his potential. Do we "further" the education he is getting by adding in tutors? I'm not really sure I'm happy to do that as I think a 6 year old boy should be spending a lot of time learning through play still!

Any thoughts as to situation, especially if anyone has experience of Highgate particularly, much appreciated. Thank you x

Honestly getting into Highgate is so competitive. There's no way I'd attempt it without a tutor but even getting a name of a good one is hard going. A lady called Arlette (I think) used to be the most sought after a few years ago. I know plenty of very bright boys from DS's preprep that were tutored that didn't get into Highgate. If you can afford the fees from year 3 I would sit him for Highgate and UCS. You could easily end up with 3 kids in 3 schools in London if you want selective schools. You need to decide about logistics and how you feel about the huge school run as it's your most likely outcome.

If you do it for your DS, then will you do it for the other 2 DC from 7? That is 3x 4 years extra school fees. Assuming 22k per year (it will only go up) that is 3 x 88k extra?
Personally I would stick with state primary for all 3 and reassess later on and relax now.

No child absolutely has to go to X school and they will also reach their potential at other schools. It might be more convenient because it is local and co-ed but it is worth that amount of money to you?

Thanks so much for your thoughts all. @Soringhaze yes I’d heard of Arlette but can’t get hold of her! How do I find out about other really good tutors? Can MN help?

@Abuildingwith4wallsandtmrinsid I totally get your point. But even if we choose other schools, the fees will be approximately the same, am I correct? Unless as you say we stay in state for now

@munchymoo, can provide details of our tutor if needed. Though perhaps not ideal if you are not local to southwest London. Wouldn't advise doing it online at this age if too far. She does 11+ as well. Regardless, hope you find someone suitable.

Yes- most independent schools will be that expensive.

I have lots of friends with kids at Highgate and they are happy having joined at different points. Not all the kids there are super bright and it is a bit of a lottery to get in. Those who joined at 3 plus or 7 plus are happy they avoided the 11 plus stress and could just relax/go on holiday/focus on hobbies etc. instead but they mostly acknowledge that they paid all that money essentially to avoid 11 plus.
A bright boy is a bright boy whether he goes to Westminster or Highgate or the local comp or the superselective grammar and when I look at it all now and where my older kids have ended up compared to my friends kids - it is all largely Russell Group unis and Oxbridge and the school itself didn’t make much difference to academic outcome in the end. It is more peer group, innate potential, talking to them, discussions, reading, museum, travel, cultural capital etc.
If you have the funds, by all means do it but also bear in mind that at secondary school it doesn’t matter as much if the children are in the same school because they travel there independently. However, at primary level it is a headache if they can’t all definitely go to the same school.

[quote hockeygrass]@bjmin , her comment was deleted by MN as it was irrelevant fiction. [/quote]
Okay, thanks. All I know is there's a bunch of posts that seem to focus on how much more difficult the school is for boys to get into. Does that mean it's really easy for girls then? Is it worth sending a DD to that school if it appears that they are treated so differently?

Why would girls and boys be treated differently at the school itself? Surely it is a question of supply and demand so probably less local options for boys than girls so more boys apply to relative places available for boys? (And the school will try and keep a 50/50 ratio regardless)

@munchymoo

Thanks so much for your thoughts all. *@Soringhaze* yes I’d heard of Arlette but can’t get hold of her! How do I find out about other really good tutors? Can MN help?

@Abuildingwith4wallsandtmrinsid I totally get your point. But even if we choose other schools, the fees will be approximately the same, am I correct? Unless as you say we stay in state for now

I would be careful with Arlette. She takes only the kids who are way ahead of their cohort already so her results aren't particularly special. Charges > £80 per hour for tuition in a group of 4 and is very unpleasant to those who don't keep up.

So few kids manage to the jump from State to Highgate at 7+ anyway. You really do need a tutor to tell you how likely it is that he'd succeed. Most of the places are taken up by the pre-prep. And he certainly won't be getting in if he swears during the admission testing so I'd nip that in the bud hard.

@Abuildingwith4wallsandtmrinsid

Why would girls and boys be treated differently at the school itself? Surely it is a question of supply and demand so probably less local options for boys than girls so more boys apply to relative places available for boys? (And the school will try and keep a 50/50 ratio regardless)

I don't know. I'm not sure. When you say, "Surely it is a question of supply and demand" do you actually know that? Has the school ever stated that this is the case? I'm just trying to be careful because so many people speculate on MN, just trying to get to the truth. Thanks so much.

@bjmin - I have lots of friends with kids at the school and we used to live in the area a while ago. My autistic DS was offered a place but then we moved. He is apparently a maths genius and they were lovely and understanding with him. I certainly got the impression they were quite modern/liberal.
My friends have stated in the past that it is more competitive for boys, but I do not know if that applies to specific entry points or was a thing of the past. Obviously there is Channing locally which takes 1000 girls in total.
Highgate is actually really quite a big school, for an independent school. Not many independent schools have that many forms at junior school level. It will suit a certain child. Certain parents will prefer girls only and nurturing rather than mixed and a big school, regardless of how bright their girls are.

@Bizzarely I've tried to reply to your PM but it keeps disappearing!

Does anyone know if the questions Has post on their website for the 7+ are actually indicative what types of questions will be on the exam or is it actually harder?