How can I help my son?

[JennetHumfrye]

DS is 4 and started school in September. He is really struggling with learning to read and even recognising letters. He can count to 20 and can recognise some numbers but it's hit and miss. He has a reading pack sent home from school but they are very basic picture books and he gets fed up of them.

He has always preferred playing outside and building things rather than drawing and colouring. I have never pushed him as he is still so small and I don't want to give him a complex. I have subscribed to ABC Mouse on our iPad encourage him to use that at weekends and if he isn't too tired from school. His dad and I read a bedtime story to him every night and he seems to enjoy this so not totally adverse to books.

I'm just a bit concerned as I don't want him to be behind and struggle at school. Similarly I don't want to overload him at home after a full day. I also don't want to confuse him with anything his teacher is doing. She is the professional after all.

I think I'm just after some reassurance that he will eventually get there. I feel like I'm letting him down but I don't know how to help him.

There are lots of learning activities that can be done through play. There are sites with useful resources like Twinkl and URBrainy or there are free downloadable resources linked on this blog: epic-information.com/ The teach your little monster to read app is great too

I have written a booklet on fun ideas and games you can use ( I'm a tutor) if you pm me your email I will send you a copy though it might be a week or so as I'm now off work for a week!

Little and often ( 5-10 min a day) with loads of rewards. Also, when you have time set up a scavenger hunt where he can find letters/ clues. Get him a notebook and pen and encourage him to make ‘notes’ when he’s outside playing and hide notes for him to find.

They don’t do much at school at this age, it is all play, so you won’t be overloading him. There is very little time spent 1:1 with NT children so schools rely on parents to do stuff at home, I’ve found.

Ideas:

Take him to the local library once a week, let him choose books. Doesn’t matter if too hard, too easy. Doesn’t matter if he ignores half of them once home.

Create a cosy corner to read in and make it a routine every day. We have a little corner of Ds room, lots of soft toys and colourful cushions and a cute lamp. Sometimes we read, sometimes we play snap, sometimes we roll around and play, sometimes we do nursery rhymes. But we make some cosy time together there each day. Especially in winter when it is too hard to play outside.

Integrate words and numbers into his play. Eg If he likes building with bricks, ask him to design a street of buildings, help him write numbers on stickers and label the buildings in his street.

Get lots of letter and number games. Look at Orchard Toys. Sum Swamp is good too.

If he likes being outside, design a game for him. You could have a bag with a lot of objects in aand you hide them in the garden, then you have another bag with squares with words written on like car, cup, etc and then he pulls out a word and has to read it then run and find the object.

You can make endless games up like this without reading the boring books from school over and over.

He is 4. Chill

I'm sure he'll do well. DD1 was the youngest and not even talking properly when she started reception! And now she's doing well

Read to him lots of books. Don't make him do the work, YOU do the work. You show him the letters (for example in a book title) and how they come together: C-A-T is cat!

Alphablocks and Numberblocks are truly fantastic!!! They will also teach you how to help him. I just bought the Numberblocks Mathlink Cubes Activity Set 0-10 and 11-20 and is a great tool as well. Very hands on, learn through play.

It's already been mentioned in the first response, but the Teach Your Monster How to Read app is really good. Alphablocks on the BBC is also good.

Otherwise, make sure you read to him every day, and talk to him about the phonics he's learning (they do a little song for each one) and most of all, don't worry! He's very young, the teachers know what they're doing, and he'll get there!

Read to him lots - at this age learning how stories go and enjoying them is as important as him reading them. Agree with little and often. Point at the words of stories you are reading as you read them and watch some online tutorials on phonics so you are reading/ saying them correctly. Very easy to get wrong and create confusion. They all get there - boys often later than girls but once it clicks it clicks so don’t worry he’s still tiny.

There is a lot you can do
Visit libraries and look at picture books. Read recipes and play with words and numbers as well. Buy magazines, read the articles out loud and then discuss them.

Use cooking to teach basic number and word recognition etc, you can even use it to teach color and shape. When gardening, try holding shape hunts. On picnics you can even ask him to find something in a specific color. Do puzzles together in addition.

Thank you to everyone for your responses. It's given me loads of inspiration and I've already put a few things in place.
Im going to step up my reading with him and I have downloaded the 'Teach your Monster to Read' app. I love all the suggestions for the little games. I am not creative at all so it's really helpful to get these sorts of suggestions.

I think I also do need to chill out as I am a very anxious person. My DS is a bright and happy boy so hopefully I will be able to give him a bit of help and he will catch up soon enough.

If he likes playing outside, can you fit learning in outside? Phonics family has a whole section on outdoor ideas for teaching them to read phonicsfamilycom.wordpress.com/outdoor-and-gross-motor/ . For maths, I've done things like draw a circle in chalk and write a number in and DC have to hunt down the right number of objects to put in it.

Little and often is definitely the way to go. Five minute mum also has a good section of ideas to make learning play based.

Do cutting and pasting crafts as well as painting and drawing to build fine motor skills. Play snakes and Ladders to work on number bonds. Practice counting and sorting easy objects such buttons. Coins, acorns, and similar. Make it short and fun.

Get a huge range of books from the library, biff chip and kipper series - work through, read to him, get him to do a little every day. Put the subtitles on your tv (if you use it). Spend time every day focusing on this. Sing, draw letter shapes in sand or rice on a tray outside. Clay modelling, rolling bandages up. Doing half press ups, learn how to cycle, practice with buttons.

I've used the app reading eggs with my three (now aged 9, 8 and 5).

It's phonics based games but interesting enough to keep them interested.

My 5 year old is in reception. I help her with reading, she sounds the letters from a word and I blend them for her.

We read each reading book several times over the week and by the end she's usually reading by sight as they are short.

All three of mine were pretty good early readers, and I think the reading eggs definitely made a huge difference.

We also use audiobooks a lot, especially in the car, just so they can get the enjoyment and hear the correct pronunciation and vocabulary with no stress.

My son is 4 and plays outdoors at nursery, he will attend school aged 5. I think it's incredibly sad to read of children not ready for school 🙁 let them play!! Play is the way.

Get books about numbers like One Mole Digging a Hole and Animals Aplenty you can read to him and count the animals etc.

Get magnetic letters and numbers and put them to the fridge so he gets them in his visual memory and you can easily refer to them.

Buy some number and alphabet puzzles to play with

Play rhyming games and games where you have to say a word that starts with the same letter

Buy the book Elmo’s ABCs or similar and read it to him and come up with additional words starting with each sound.

Count things in real life all the time- how many buses do you see etc

Make it all play based and read to him. It won’t feel like work to him. If you make talking about numbers / counting a d letter sounds just part of your everyday life he’ll pick it up just like he’s learned to speak or learned shapes and colours etc.

He has always preferred playing outside and building things

Could you look at things with instructions? Or even make your own for things he likes to do, maybe buy some bulbs and read the planting instructions while you plant them.

An advent calendar will be popular I'm sure.