Moved house, place now available at local school, should we move DD?

[yellowgingham]

We relocated over the summer. We moved to a village and the primary school had no places, but DD was offered a space in year 1 at a very good school on the outskirts of the nearest town.

She's generally quite a resilient child although she can be very shy, so we were worried about how she'd settle. However it seems to have gone really well. She's skipped into school happily most days, loves her new teacher, has started talking about some of the new friends she's made, enthusiastic about reading homework etc. We couldn't have asked for more really.

Of course, now I've just found out that a space has come up in year 1 in the village school. It's about a 12 minute walk away, her current school is about a 12 minute drive (maybe a bit more with parking etc). We are making it work with our jobs etc but I do find it a pain. Plus I'm conscious that most of the children at her current school live nearer to the school and worried that she might feel out of the loop in future years.

I'm really torn about moving her again. Her current school is a "better" school on paper (better ofsted rating and SATS results, more active PTA etc although I know that isn't everything) From what I've gathered, the village school is fine but does get mixed reviews. I have met others in the village who have chosen to take their kids to schools elsewhere, although I've also met parents of kids at the village school who are really happy with it. We've never been able to look round it due to covid.

DH thinks she should definitely stay at her current school and we shouldnt rock the boat unless the logistics are completely impractical (they aren't) and if she moves again she'll start to give up on making friends thinking there's no point as she never stays anywhere long-term... I do see his point, especially as she was at another school for her nursery year so this is already her third school in just over 2 years.

It's also not impossible that we may actually move into the town where her current school is, although not for 4 years or so. And we also might stay where we are, which means another 6 years of driving her to school...

Both feed into the same secondary.

Any one been in a similar situation, or have any thoughts or advice?

I'd move her so you're all properly invested in the place where your home is and can have a few years of stability. She's only in Y1 and as she's had a positive experience of changing school once, she'll draw on that - and on your response - to get settled into the closest school. Being able to walk to school, meeting others on the way, popping to the same local park on the way home, going round to a friend's house and knowing it's only a short walk home are all advantages of being at the closest school. Also, because she's only had a year at school so far, it won't necessarily feel disruptive to her in the same way as it does to you. As adults we approach it as an additional, unexpected move at the end of a school year but for all your DD knows, it's not unusual to move at the end of reception because that's her normal. An extra move at this point in Y1 can be done without drama and explained as being because she needed to go to town school until there was a Y1 place at village school.

School run v straightforward this morning, DD skipped into school happily and another child had drawn a picture for her! So sweet.

Then I bumped into a mum I've met in the village who was saying how great the new headteacher is at the village school and they all really like her 🙈

So conflicted!

Children usually cope fine with moving schools, so I wouldn't worry much about that aspect. I'd also avoid reading too much into which school is better "on paper"; ask again to visit the village school (or at the very least, have a zoom meeting with the head or something) and make your own judgement.

If you might move back into town, and they're both at the village school, I guess you might find that you can't get places for them at the town school - if the commute is more of a problem in the other direction then there might be an argument for sticking with the town school. Going to the nearest school might be more of an advantage at the upper end of primary when they're beginning to have a bit more independence (eg taking themselves to school or to friends' houses).

I would definitely be way of better on paper. I really liked the first school we went to even though there local was supposedly outstanding. In reality it had not been inspected under a new head and was not nearly as good as the other school in many respects. If the journey had not been such a pain, I would have stayed. I'm still glad we moved because of the local friends aspect. Yes, even just going to the park after school and hanging out with local mums was great. Also made a great friendship group with some local Mums and we still have coffee every week despite our kids being in y8 now and no more school runs for past couple of years!

Way = wary

So a 12 min drive each way for you prob adds up to just under an hour in the car for you a day. 5 hours a week. Similar to walk or would you save some time going to the local school?

What’s the drive like in bad weather?

It would be more eco to move to local?

You’d meet more people walking?

What would you have done if both had been avail originally?

I think I’d move her tho appreciate it feels like a wrench

@merrymarigold as I've said upthread though, it's not just about Ofsted ratings - there are a number of parents in the village who didn't send their children to the local school because of concerns about behaviour, the headteacher etc. I do know what you mean about judging in real life rather than "on paper" (we chose a "good" school over an "outstanding" one for reception in our old location, based on the school tour, talking to parents etc), but from what we know there's nothing which suggests the village school is better - other than its location of course. If the schools were next to each other I would 100% choose the town school.

@newgirls if both had been available I think we would have gone local. But we knew less about the schools then. We would save time going to the local school but actually the difference isn't huge and due to the different start/finish times we'd start work at the same time.

@newgirls I do feel v guilty about the environmental impact though 🙈 our next door neighbour has a son the same age as DD2 and wants to send him to the town school so at least we might be able to car share in a few years!!!

@merrymarigold sorry I think I misunderstood your post - so you mean the local school wasn't actually better but still worth it because it was walkable?

If the schools were next to each other I would 100% choose the town school.

if both had been available I think we would have gone local. But we knew less about the schools then.

All this says to me you’d rather stay put.

A village school/local school is great if you’re committed to staying put. But if you might move again, the benefits get less - because by Year 5/6 when your DC1 will be able to be independent and walk you’ll possibly be commuting her the other way in a car anyway!

We drive DD to school about 10 minutes away. Our local school is rated inadequate so that was an easier decision!

It’s fine. We are quite rural so it’s normal for people to drive to their kids to school. Walking routes are country roads & no pathments. My DD has friends who live scattered around our small little town & it’s not a problem at all. 🤷🏼‍♀️ We drive for play dates, takes about 7-8 mins max for the furthest away. To be honest, post covid, play dates are more commonly out somewhere like a nearby softplay or cafe than houses. Maybe it’ll shift back over time.

& if both these schools feed into the same high school, the very meaningful friendships of teenage-hood will be formed with kids from all over your local area! Not just those who live nearby. My best mates at high school lived scattered up several miles apart. Would just walk or get the bus to see them. A few lived nearby but I didn’t see them more particularly.

[quote yellowgingham]@merrymarigold sorry I think I misunderstood your post - so you mean the local school wasn't actually better but still worth it because it was walkable?[/quote]
It was better on paper (outstanding rather than good), but in reality I don't think it was as good. Certain things, such as Sport and Music were much better the first school we went to. If they'd both been local I would have stayed at the first school, but it was the unpredictable journey which swung it for me. Having chosen to move to the local school, with hindsight I can see all the benefits of being local. I agree, it was easier for us as the school did have it's supposedly 'outstanding' status, but the staff turnover there was awful and it was a bit of a SAT factory to be honest.