Oh Dear, what to do?

[SweetSnowflake]

Not really education question, but my 4 yr old dd came home last night and said xxx from her class said a naughty word to day..FCKIN*!
He's just turned 4 FGS and ive now found out he's said it to at least one of the other girls in dd's class and in front of her two friends yesterday
This boy is being assesed at minute, dont know his abckground, but do know he isnt from this part of the country, although not abraod and speaks a little differently(but dont know how anyone could misinterprite that!)..
Spoke to teacher this morn, she said xxx does sit with your dd!, i said, that i had not said she sits with him, but that he had said it to her, could have been playtime, dinner time, anytime!, she blamed his accent!, i said that was rubbish in a polite way as my dd nor the other girl are used to this language and they both said it plain as day!

Sow teacher is saying shes really pleased with how he's improved since he started and is calming down, seeminly to try and brush past it, but i said that my dd was made to feel like she said a bad word yesterday when she said a silly word we(as a family) made up for 'quiet', i said i think he/his parents need to be reminded that hes 4, my dd and her classmates are 4/5 and this language shouldnt be used.

T.A caught me on way out and said dd's freidns mum had said same to her yesterday and seemed to take it more seriously, i told her about dd feeling about about this silly word and asked if she could make sure she knew she wasnt naughty, T.A and teacher are speaking to whole class today about 'bad' words..but tbh, dont know if it'll get through..any advice?, been here yourself?

[SweetSnowflake]

sorry teacher said xx doesnt sit with dd meaning he 'couldnt ' have said it to her

[perpetualworrier]

I think you have to rely on yourself and your kids to know what's right. In any class you are going to get some children who hear this at home and think it's normal.

Best way to stop your children repeating it is to ignore completely the first time they say it.

It's very difficult for the teacher to do anything about a specific incidence if she didn't hear it herself. You wouldn't want her to punish your child on the say so of another pupil.

If they're doing a session on bad words, they've taken the issue seriously and are doing what they can. I would be interested to hear how they will go about it though. I wouldn't want them to introduce new bad words.

[SweetSnowflake]

hmm, yes your right, how can they say dont say that word without actually saying THAT WORD?..they must ahve come across this before though so maybe have books only this kind of thing?

dd KNOWS its wrong to say it, but i nearly cried when she came out with it, although i was me who asked her to say itso i knew what was happening.

will ask teacher at home time tonight and if i get chance will bring it up with parent liason officer tomorrow, see what she thinks?

Thanks for you reply