Uniform

[Stuckinarut79]

Anyone challenged a schools uniform policy? My 6 year old, hates her uniform, all her friends are boys and she wants to be just like them, we have tears over her school dress, she wants shorts like the boys.

There is a back story, she’s shy, quiet and for a few reasons her self confidence is really low. Lockdown was tough for her. I’ve signed her up for after school classes as this means she can go in her pekit , so it’s only 2 days she has to wear her dress. She’s struggling academically and isn’t a big fan of school so I know it’s not all about the uniform, but I hate that’s what causes the tears two days a week. I also have my own issues with the sexist issues of girls having to be in dresses when the boys are in shorts, plus the uniform is not one you can get from the supermarkets, is poor quality and really expensive - £100 blazer, £60 pinafore! The heads all about high standards and her response has been to generic uniform queries if you don’t like it find a new school , I’m tempted but I don’t think pulling her out right now is best for her - over a bloody uniform! It does make my blood boil though!

I’m hoping it’s a phase and she knows she can wear anything she wants at weekends and after school but wondered if any one had challenged or had a daughter with similar issues - all advice welcome. At the moment I’m going with - that’s life, and rules are rules, but it’s tough when I agree with her!

St. Joseph's Cadogan SW3 has a green pinafore and hideous floral dresses for the girls. I can not imagine my DDs for one instant entertaining them. Berets Boaters and Caps are £25 each. Holy Cross in Fulham has £100 wool blazers and also full range of private school type £15 socks and compulsary school coats... its utter madness for state schools. Can you tell I was bored whilst DD was at a class?
Maybe a new thread on ridiculous unforms?

@minuetpiece

St. Joseph's Cadogan SW3 has a green pinafore and hideous floral dresses for the girls. I can not imagine my DDs for one instant entertaining them. Berets Boaters and Caps are £25 each. Holy Cross in Fulham has £100 wool blazers and also full range of private school type £15 socks and compulsary school coats... its utter madness for state schools. Can you tell I was bored whilst DD was at a class? Maybe a new thread on ridiculous unforms?

I've just seen this. £85 for the compulsory grey duffel coat. £50 for the girls' head gear (beret and boater required). Buying uniform for the girls look very much more expensive than for the boys - that's not right.

Yes the boys can get their trousers and shirts from supermarkets so a cheaper uniform , another reason to be annoyed! But yes I chose the school, and I knew the uniform regulations when I did. I just hadn’t counted on a daughter who cries and fights going into into school on the day she has to wear it, yet goes in so much happier on days she can wear her pe kit.

My friends DD wore the "boys" uniform all the way through primary school. For some bizarre reason the girls wear navy (trousers or skirts) and boys wear grey (trousers or shorts.)
Friends DD wore her brothers hand me downs because why buy more uniform when when have a perfectly good set! School never said anything about it. Although I think they are stricter now.

@Stuckinarut79 there's a whole campaign group for 'trousers for girls'. I'm literally not joking when I say I can not imagine any of the Yr6 girls at our school or any I know wearing summer dresses and pinafores. More trousers, shorts and kickers / DMs.
What would horrify me is that the HT and governors are so old fashioned that they think girls dressed as dolls is acceptable or practical.
This would ring massive alarm bells about the ethos of the school as a whole.

trousersforall.co.uk/

https://www.letclothesbeclothes.co.uk/post/trousersshoulddbeinneveryschoolluniformpolicy

Apparently at St Joseph's "Trousers are not part of the girl’s uniform." so just one girl then, I suppose the rest can wear them :D

Seriously tho, gov.uk says that schools must not discriminate. But they do say that schools can decide if girls can wear trousers. That doesn't really add up to me but hey.

www.gov.uk/school-uniform

Yep, as I said, my old RC state school still only allows girls to wear pinafores or skirts. No culottes even. That's specified on web site. Defo no trousers. I have zero respect for the governors & diocese that think this is fine. They wear blazers too but no head wear these days

One of my dc managed to change the uniform policy in their school. A combination of pointing out the disparity in costs, calculate this over the 7 years at the school to reach a larger figure! Also highlighting that they don't want to identify as male to wear 'boys' uniform. There were other points too which I can't remember. Took it to governors as the SMT did not change it quickly enough for their liking. Might also be worth approaching the diocese highlighting the inequalities if you get nowhere with school/ governors. Generally there are other sexist policies too which you might also highlight.

I also find it hilarious they have such a pretentious uniform and then allow the nursery to attend in a tracksuit?
Some private schools do that too

Make an appointment with the teacher to tell them what's going on and then send her in wearing the boys uniform. Read up about 'every child matters' before the meeting.

Surely you knew the uniform policy before you sent her there?

As a mum of a 3 year old putting a school choice down, the implications of sexist uniforms probably don't register. It's when your DD decides there is no way on earth they are going to wear a silly skirt that it becomes an issue. Nor would I. I hated my early 1980s uniform for the same reasons and resented it. I just wanted to wear trousers or shorts.
Watch ' no more boys & girls' for very powerful insight into the damage done to girls confidence by these rules and other sexist assumptions.

Mine go to a state Catholic primary. Strict uniform policy, shirt and tie but no blazer. Very definitely no shorts or trousers for girls. It was challenged a few years ago And a vote was forced by a parent govener but it was voted to stay the same 😳

@missnevermind out of interest was that the Childrens vote or Gov vote?
At our Rights Respecting school ( and all other RR schools) this would get debated and voted by the children.
I can not fathom why adults want to put girls and boys in different clothes from the outset. Why not just one policy with all options in?

Can anyone think of a job where we would all be told we had to wear a skirt. No debate? I literally cal not think of any.

The vote was given to the parents. Not the children. But it wasn't even close.

@missnevermind

The vote was given to the parents. Not the children. But it wasn't even close.

I despair.

As a parent they presumably support the ‘pretentiousness’ of a fancy uniform, but they should understand that a child feeling comfortable is more important, especially when all they want is to dress in what is deemed to be the other gender’s uniform.

I’m all for keeping up standards, but it makes not a jot of difference whether a child wears trousers or a skirt. Both can look very smart.

@sanjani this wasn't about a fancy uniform even; it was to allow girls to wear short or trousers in recent history. I am speechless that parents voted no to adding the option in. What harm would it cause even if take up was low? TBH I'd also be expecting the HT to just put it in the policy with the governors. I'd love to know if all those same parents make their girls wear skirts at all other times. My DD1 doesnt even own one - school skirt or non school.

This all blows my mind. I honestly could not send my child to a school that demands such ridiculous uniforms. Particularly no trousers for girls, it goes against everything my feminist side believes.

My DD has got into a school with no uniform, which I imagine is pretty unusual. It’s a fantastic, outstanding school but they are heavy promotors of children being individual. 🤷🏼‍♀️ I must admit I feel kinda sad not to see DD in a little polo & school jumper but I’d take no uniform over my 4 year old wearing a boater hat, blazer & assigned school coat

Well I am having to eat my words about state schools with boaters I am genuinely amazed though. I went to an all-girls' grammar school in the 1970s and even in those far-off days, the school hat was optional (and no one wore it).

I am also shocked that parents voted against girls being allowed to wear trousers. They could surely still dress their own children in skirts? FWIW DD wore a skirt to school until sixth form but it cost about £12 max from M&S.

The uniform does sound ridiculously expensive and I personally hate different boys and girls uniform. Did you not consider this though when you chose the school for your child?

As well as being right educationally for my children I also took into account uniform when making my choices. I specifically chose schools with sensible uniform and trouser options for girls. The catholic schools with kilts and white ankle socks for girls do not promote the right environment for girls' education as far as I'm concerned so I stayed well clear.

TBF I don't think people always realise these things and assume girls can just wear trousers and shorts too. I have made sure our school have just one uniform with all options listed now. It makes a massive statement about their view of girls as 'pretty little things' in my opinion, but I'm sure others don't see it as a big deal. Skirts aren't great for climbing, football, hanging upside down on bars etc...and lots of junior girls don't want their knickers on show... especially in Yr5/6 when some have started their periods.

There is a new law OP about schools having to offer affordable uniform option. There seems to be a fair few who don't. St George's Hanover Sq is another one with eye watering £ wool blazers and then grey wool duffle coats..
Sounds like you could challenge it on costs and disparity. Maybe contact local press & ask them to run an article? Anonymously of course lol