My six year old hates writing, drawing and colouring in

[Cherryblossom200]

Hi everyone,

Well the title pretty much explains it 😂 I have a six year old who has never expressed any interest in colouring in, writing or drawing. She was an early walker and talker, her vocabulary has always been advanced for her age. But as she hasn't practiced writing as much as other children, she is behind in that side.

Her teachers are trying to get her to do cursive writing which she hates. She can print fairly well, but the teachers insist the children do joined up writing.

Her reading seems fine, she is on blue level which I think is ok and she her maths seems ok too.

I think the teachers have written my child off as not particularly academic compared to other children in the class. This annoys the hell out of me, my child is bright. Her ability to retain knowledge is amazing, however she isn't interested in the boring stuff 😂

Should I be concerned? I don't know if she is a slow learner. Do children change as they get older?

I've tried getting her to practice writing with me, but it's like pulling teeth. I'm at a loss as to how to get her to be interested in writing and drawing.

Thanks to anyone who replies!

My ds now 13 was the same (still is) I can barely read his wrighting he can barely read it himself and he point blank refuses to do art would rather a detention that said tho he is doing great in school past his Sat's in year 6 and is top classes in high school. Don't worry the teachers must have super powers and can read any wrighting haha.

That's reassuring to hear!

The teachers I'm sure see this as some sign of low intelligence. I'm not expecting her to be a brain surgeon, but I think she is still bright in her own way.

Sometimes I feel the expectations of schools in this country are far too high which is comes to the younger children. Over on the continent they don't start school until 7!

My daughter loved Rob Biddulph on You tube during last summers lockdown who teaches them how to draw. She will now draw much more independently. Sometimes using You tube more often without guidance.

Also lots of tricks to draw things using the outline of your hand. My daughter didn't like drawing things as they didn't look right so having guidance (not me) or a 'cheat' really helped.

My daughter is now nearly 8 and In year 3 now. Her writing has really improved in the last year or so in spite of lockdown but In year 1 she refused to pick up a pencil and write. We Was advised to concentrate on finger strong activities - so things like Hama beads/aqua beads, Lego, play dough - rolling out and making shapes will help develop muscles in hands and help with finger control. I think by concentrating on this has made a massive difference. This maybe away of helping without the pressure of getting to do something that she doesn’t want to do. Short bursts of writing of 5 mins - nothing longer at most to help build up strength in hands.

I also teach a levels. I would say handwriting is something that is heavily concentrated on in primaries - however I have students who get As who have extremely bad handwriting so it hasn’t stopped them achieving.

I would also say with my daughter I just don’t think she was physically ready to write at 5/6. I do completely agree that too much emphasis and pressure is put on it at such a young age

6 seems quite young for cursive writing. My child in year 3 only started it last October and now writes neater than most adults I know. No way would he have been ready at 6. My child in Year 1 still struggles with writing on the line.

I really wouldn't worry.

I would talk to the school and ask why cursive writing is so important now.

Hi my 6yr old son sounds very similar to your daughter. The only difference is his school are not doing joined up writing yet.

Not sure if this helps but will share with you some things I’ve done to encourage writing/drawing/colouring in. First thing was confidence. I dug out my writing books from when I was 6 to show my son my untidy writing at his age. He sees my present writing as neat and doesn’t think his is any good in comparison. I compliment him on any letters that look really good and say things like “I love the way you wrote your s there, I would like to see more like that one.” I stopped correcting ‘bad’ letters.

On another occasion I got out the mr men books as they are simple in design and we love reading them. I asked him to choose a few of his favourite characters and I showed him how to draw them. He wasn’t happy his drawing wasn’t as good as mine so we swapped pictures to paint them, he was happier with that. We painted them rather than colour them with pencils as it was easier to block in colour with a paintbrush. Pencils are thin and take a long time with big areas. Then we got a black felt tip pen to do the outlines which made the picture look amazing. This really boosted his confidence.
I found that if I show him how to draw he can copy the step by step successfully and gains a sense of achievement - he is more likely to complete the picture.
Another tip is to use big thick pencils rather than thin ones to cover larger areas quicker.

A big step forward for us was getting him to use more than one colour to colour in. I used kumon let’s colour (2+) as they are quick and fun to do.

Hope something here helps

How is she at motor skills in general? Especially fine/fiddly stuff like lego, sewing, sticking beads etc?

Do you have a grandparent or similar who could write to her, including asking some questions? Your child may like the idea of writing back.
My kids like to write for a real life purpose but less keen on 'school' writing.

Thanks everyone. Her fine motor skills from a young age were advanced, eating with a fork and spoon, doing buttons up stuff like that came easily to her.

She just doesn't like writing etc.

It might just be a case of waiting it out until the focus on cursive writing wanes.

I'd get her doing plenty of mark making at home but dressed up as fun rather than her, paper, and a pen.

Have you seen five minutes mum? She has lots of ideas like letters on the window in dry markers - even you writing them and the kid wiping them off. Or a tray with sand in it and writing letters and shapes with your finger. It may not be challenging for a six year old but it may change the context and might re engage them.

For what it's worth this idea that European kids don't start school til seven is only partly true. They're still taught how to read and write before seven, they don't just wander round gormlessly - it's just not called school til later.

Back in the day my eldest dd (she's nearly 20) they didn't teach cursive at all. Her writing really wasn't that good and in yr 5 she was actually told to be neater. She has an IQ of 155 and is scoring a very high 1st at university. Hand writing has no bearing on ability.

I agree with @SnuggyBuggy I've seen cursive come and go at least twice in my time as a parent having kids in school and I'm sure it will happen again!

Cursive writing has been a requirement of the National Curriculum since 1988 so I'm not sure how they got away with it but I'm not in favour of teaching the youngest cursive until they are forming individual letters correctly and fluently (and no entry flicks at the early stages).
OP you said her fine motor skills are fine but what about her gross motor and core strength?
Many people don't realise that is only part of the story. It's important to have a strong core and shoulder girdle when writing or it's effortful and even painful for some children.

We nothing but cursive in infants but after about year 3 there wasn't the focus and most people reverted to print or a mix. I can see the advantage of cursive as a faster way to write in the days before word processing, don't get the fuss now.

https://www.clearvuehealth.com/writingtyping/

Recent research found that "Students who write notes on paper actually learn more than students who take notes on computers."

Thanks everyone, in general I think her motor skills are fine. I've never had any cause for concern.

Currently she's playing with her play doh, doing pretend fillings in teeth. And she is fine with all the fiddly bits. But this is something she loves doing so she is happy to apply herself to it.

With writing etc she doesn't find enjoyment in it and therefore just doesn't want to do it. In particular cursive handwriting. I've tried discussing it with the teachers but they are not budging. I'm wondering at what point I can put my foot down as the parent and say stop with forcing something which doesn't work?

My son was like this and now one of his favourite things to do is draw. He spends hours drawing at home and he manages with writing. He was diagnosed with disgraphia when he was age 8. His fine motor skills were always behind so his primary school did fine motor skills things with him every morning and I think this really helped with the drawing and writing. He was lucky he got alot of encouragement at primary school.

Sorry I spelled dysgraphia incorrectly. I was not suggesting your dc has dysgraphia just saying my son found writing and drawing so very difficult and now at age 12 his favourite thing to do is draw:)

By gross motor skills I'm talking about things like being able to move along monkey bars swinging arm to arm, wheelbarrow walking, wall push-ups, twisting from the waist while keeping feet still, windmill arms, crossing mid point bouncing a large ball from hand to hand, balancing on one leg, climbing, kicking a ball ...

Just to be on the safe side, I would get her eyesight tested if you haven't had this done recently.

She already wears glasses, so it's not an eye sight thing.

I'm hopefully it'll come later on when she's actually is interested it it and slightly older.

I'm assuming Y1? My grandson (whom I parent) as very similar. Very early talker. Motor skills excellent - riding a bike at 3, can do somersaults on the trampoline. He has recently had a phase of colouring in as ke loves youtuber who paints iphones etc. I am not worried (and I'm a teacher and get bothered about most things education with him). He's a July birthday and so still only 5 and a half. I'm not worried because I've read alot of research that says that children with advanced speech at a young age tend to do well academically. They don't necessarily learn to read earlier than others but when they do their comprehension is great. DGS is doing pretty well with his reading but his writing is immature because of his birthday and because he's just not interested, however I know that by Y4 or Y5 (and hopefully earlier) when he has learnt the mechanics of writing, nobody will know he struggled to begin with. His speech and vocabulary are great and we are currently reading (me to him and at his request) Harry Potter so I'm pretty confident that everything is in place for when handwriting has become second nature. However maths and science will probably always be more his thing.
I would just say - make sure that if the teacher ability groups the class (a bit oudated now but some still do) that you query it if she gets put on the low attaining table. This happened to grandson because he wouldn't put pen to paper and the teacher didn't know what he could do. I queried this and she assured me that this table had access to age related work. However since lockdown - he went to school on a keyworker place - and being in a much smaller class with a more senior teacher overseeing - he seems to now be working on the second to top group. This is not a style of teaching I subscribe to but it has been interesting to see that when the focus is off writing, all of a sudden people have seen his potential.

Would you like to hear the other side of the "they dont start formal schooling until later on the continent" argument? Im a guide leader on the continent. Any time we do any of the international activities I have to use the ones aimed at Brownies because they really cannot cope with any activities that involve reading or writing.

Honestly this standardisation of children drives me mad. In an ideal world it would be great if she had beautiful handwriting on top of all her other obvious abilities but is it that essential in today's age? My DS is a nuclear physicist and can't do joined up writing, it hasn't held him back. If you want to foster her drawing or artistic skills I'd suggest you do it too and make it a joint activity, even something like mindful colouring together. Just make it fun and not a chore.