How to respond: Teacher discouraged DS

[Saku]

My DS is in Y3 and have ASD spectrum. He is normally happy lad. Because of ASD he is very much into numbers.
He know all the times tables till 2 to 14 times tables. The school has one online game about times tables which all KS2 kids from Y3 to Y6 play and get points.
My son like that game and he alone earned thousands of points on it he got continuously 2 months champion certificate on the game in school from the head teacher ...... he still play and his points are increasing.
But now his class teacher said to him that "He was cheating." ; when he took a little time to do a times table when others finished early (while playing a game 'pass the times table' in class similar to pass the parcel game). Then disqualified him from the game.

We taught DS that cheating is very bad and he should never cheat in tests or exams etc. BUT class teacher called him 'a cheater' in front of whole class when he was not cheating.
Now he is very low he does not want to play his online game in times tables.
He not interested in playing with his baby sister.

Should I raise issue to the teacher as may be in future the same thing can happen. (that will be huge as in pandemic I have to take appointment to the teacher and it will be a telephonic)
What I will say to him "you called my child a cheater when he didn't " ??

Or try to console my DS that the teacher did not mean it or was being very silly to say it this to you. I am not sure what to do and what will be best to DS.

Talk to the teacher. Find out exactly what happened and what was said, and if the teacher still insists your son cheated ask them why.

Also tell them how upset your son is now, and that this incident has put him off the game/times tables.

No child should be shamed in front of others. Ask what the “cheating” was. I wouldn’t be happy about this and you should try and resolve it.

@AccidentallyOnPurpose

Talk to the teacher. Find out exactly what happened and what was said, and if the teacher still insists your son cheated ask them why.

Also tell them how upset your son is now, and that this incident has put him off the game/times tables.

That.

Definitely talk to the teacher. Find out what was actually said. Go in with the attitude that you want to resolve a misunderstanding. Obviously if she actually called him a cheater in front of the entire class that's terrible but he may well have misunderstood.

I wouldn't be happy with that so I'd definitely have a word with the teacher but go in with an open mind. Children often misinterpret what adults say. It should definitely be addressed and resolved though.

Thanks everyone, before I was not very keen to talk to the teacher but definitely interested to know what actually happened as I was thinking may be bringing the teacher on the phone call and enquiring about game, can piss the teacher off more.
But now I will try to put as gentle as possible coz I want to know what happened that day so that I will be better in consoling my DS and encourage him to play times table game again.
Thanks again to put my mind straight.

That sounds poor and I agree, you should discuss with the teacher.

@Saku

Thanks everyone, before I was not very keen to talk to the teacher but definitely interested to know what actually happened as I was thinking may be bringing the teacher on the phone call and enquiring about game, can piss the teacher off more. But now I will try to put as gentle as possible coz I want to know what happened that day so that I will be better in consoling my DS and encourage him to play times table game again. Thanks again to put my mind straight.

Even if it's a misunderstanding, the teacher has to know that your son is upset and put off times tables,and work to remediate that.

So if you're worried about how you'll come across maybe ring and talk about that and then follow with how it seems to have been caused by thinking the teacher thinks he's cheating, then look for further clarification into that?

Is there an email address you could use instead of a phone call if you're not very comfortable with that?

Thanks for suggestions which made me comfortable to talk to the teacher and to initiate the talk. I have talked to the teacher he was saying that DS was rubbing the times table and writing it back which was not allowed.
when asked(privately) to DS he said there was no time to erase and write back as they have to write and pass the times table immediately and he didn't rubbed it or cheated in any way.
But I am happy that I talked to the teacher and let him know that DS was very upset and was saying that "I hate times tables." because of the incident.
I cant argue about cheating though as teacher has the point that he was there not me; at the time when it happened.
Therefore I am going to console DS about times tables saying that I believe him if he will practice more then no one can call him cheater anymore as he can tell times tables straight away so he should not give up.

Hi OP.

I don't understand what your son is alleged to have done. Can you explain?

I'm sure, though, that the teacher should not be accusing your son of cheating in front of his classmates.

Kids do cheat! A child may open their book to find an answer in a test or quiz for example. The teacher may have seen the ds write it when they are supposed to know the sum by heart. In a game, if you take a short cut or make it easier then you have cheated! It is very dramatic to talk about a child being accused of cheating! However, for a child with ASD, it may feel difficult to manage. The OP has done the right thing to talk to the teacher about their ds being upset because of the way their ASD affects them but also needs to talk to their ds about what is cheating and about how to cope if they do sneak a peek when they shouldn't!