Ex wanting to change school

[PandaBabyJuly]

Ex wants to change our child's school - he is saying he does not need my permission to do this and he is going to go ahead and change it in the new year.

I don't want the school to be changed and nor does our child.
Our child is coming home to me upset and worried about having to change schools but ex is maintaining that it is happening and I am the one who is to blame for the upset.

Does anyone know where I stand legally? Can I block this from happening?

We have a shared care order in place currently.

Thank you

You need to speak to a lawyer first thing in the morning and to your child’s current school.

Schools are one area which has to be agreed by both parents. The other is change of name.

He cannot unilaterally change schools for no good reason and your child's opinion would carry some weight.

If it went to court it would generally depend on why he wants to move schools. What is his rationale?

If you feel he will go ahead you could go to court for a prohibited steps order to specifically block him moving her. It would be worth writing to the school and council to advise that there is no agreement to move schools, just in case he gives notice.

If he does then I think court is likely.

I will speak to my solicitor in the morning

He has said that our daughter wants to move school. This is untrue. He wants to move her school to be closer to his home because he is struggling to get her to school on time and the school are beginning to become concerned by this.

I think he has already approached the school to say she will be leaving; what concerns me is the school haven't mentioned this to me and that he has probably got her on the waiting lists already and she is somewhere near the top so the "heads up" for me is just so he has covered his tracks so to speak - and knowing him he will move her by the end of the week / month when a place comes up.

I think court may be my only option as his thoughts are "it's my way or nothing" and this is how he has been forever

I would drop a letter into school by hand in the morning saying that you have been told the above by your ex but that neither you nor your daughter agree to the move and that you are referring the matter to your solicitor. Ask if you can be copied in on any further correspondence on the matter and also be provided with copies of any paperwork regarding the move which may have already been received or sent. They may not do the latter due to GDPR but if you have joint split custody then they arguably should have already done so.

There’s one solution to the problem - he gets up earlier on the days he has to get her to school.......

What is his reason for changing schools? What proportion of drop offs and pick ups is he responsible for? If he genuinely can't get her to school on time (getting up earlier might not help if he is, say, reliant on a bus to get there and there is no earlier bus) then I guess this might be a valid reason for changing school?

Definitely speak to a solicitor. I'd be applying for a prohibited steps order to prevent this if I were you. If he still wants to pursue it then the court will likely want further evidence as to why before making a decision. How old is your child?

Are you the resident parent? Do you get the child benefit? Does dc spend most of the week with you? If so, apply to the court to sort out the residency of your dc. With you. If dc doesn’t spend the majority of time with you and he gets child benefit, then he has say in the school. It’s best if you agree but you must get resident for your dc with you then there is no argument and the judge would probably agree that dc stays at the school. Judges like continuity. It’s what’s best for the child. See a family solicitor.

Check with your LA as ours hasn't done any in year moves since March due to covid.

I would contact the admissions team at your local authority (or his if they are different) and raise this with them. If she is any kind of waiting list it is usually with them and they are most likely to base it on the resident parent x

Hi everyone,

Sorry my solicitor sent me an email as I'd emailed her about these problems.

It is a 50/50 split and the courts ordered that neither of us change her school without permission of the other parent. So he shouldn't be doing this.
He was granted 50/50 on the pretence that he could get her to school and his working hours allowed it (which he lied about at the time) they were very clear neither of us were to change her school as that is a place of stability and continuity.

He cannot get her to school because his working hours don't allow him to do the drop offs; he drives; so he's relying on others to do it for him - which is why she is always late. And he is struggling to find people to take her to school; so wants to move her to the school local to him. She is 9.

I'm waiting on my solicitor but she is saying this is parental alienation; combined with the many other things he has done. And this is a clear breach of our order - so she is swaying towards a prohibited steps order and asking the courts to change the 50/50 to a 60/40 split in the favour.

I have already emailed the present school and told them I don't agree to move her, I will contact the other local authority tomorrow and make my position very clear; showing them the court order and birth certificate too to also attempt to prevent a move in school.

Would a prohibited steps order be granted before he could move her? As if she's number 1 on the list a move could be imminent before a hearing date gets listed?

Sorry for all the questions I am genuinely worried and tomorrow seems so long away to wait for my solicitor.

As you've said, share the order with the LA and I would imagine that they won't change her school without agreement from you both. How utterly selfish of him to be trying to do this, after knowing he'd never be able to commit to 50/50 care.