I don't WANT a parent helper to write comments about dd1's reading in her reading book!

[pilote]

Is she a teacher? NO! Am I being totally unreasonable to ask her teacher who this person is and what her qualifications are? The TA already does most of the reading and handwriting practice with dd1, what is her bloody teacher doing all day fgs.

My youngest has additional support in school and although we read with him everyday he reads with TAs and parent helpers.

An objective point of view helps and if you read with your child everyday you know what they are or are not capable of.

I think the OP is damn right ungrateful and should give up some of her time to do something like this .

PS as parents we are encouraged to go in whenever we can. I usually mention the day before I would like to pop in, since I am never normally able it is a thrill for me and my girls. Whenever I have a day off I try to do this, time permitting

Captain - sure! but what I am saying is that sometimes comments in the reading record, whilst they most definitely need to be factual and constructive, should also be worded in an encouraging way for the parent too! Because sometimes you feel like a fecking failure of a parent because your child isn't reading as well as the others (..are you doing enough pratice with them, are other parents making more time for this etc etc)...And like it or not the parent is a key player in the child's education. Not saying they should write platitudes like 'lovely reading' when this does not apply, but just need to be aware of the sensitivities

My dd's teacher seems to appreciate this (God love her, she's the business)- and has a sixth sense that the parent might need reassuring too. This has a positive effect (makes me want to spend more time coaching and supporting dd)

sorry for the waffle - but I don't think everybody gets this. Especially not parents of early / able readers

The parent helper may be getting some school experience prior to doing TA training (I've looked into it myself)....

...but that aside, I personally welcome all comment re my DSs reading (he's in year 1) as he struggled with it all through reception. Thanks to a dedicated team of teacher, TA and parent helper who have encouraged him over the last six weeks, his confidence has improved dramatically and he is now reading (or trying to) everything he sees.

I think the OP probably came from a school background where there was one teacher for 30 kids and no-one else.....

I just wish TAs and parent helpers had been around in my day.

But we dont know what comments have been written ( unless I missed it ) Op would not
say.

You are right in saying that the encouargement should be from the taecher to the parent , but the poor parent helper is there to listen / help the child read , write the facts - 'good read' 'neede help with so so word ' etc etc. Parents should realise this and not get so senstive about a comment from a parent helper when the parent should know what the childs is capable of anyway.

I am just glad that my DS has a chance to read to someone.

Fucking hell

I'm a parent helper three mornings a week. I haven't got a teaching qualification. I do have a degree though, and several A-Levels, and children of my own, and a genuine dedication to the children I help look after, and a copy of the foundation stage curriculum. If I was asked to hear a child read and write a concise remark in the reading record it wouldn't occur to me that there might be an intellectual snob with a shitty attitude at the other end of it.

Nice.

Her teacher is teaching the class. Not hearing each child read which would take her most of a day.

She is probably hearing them read in a group and helping them learn in big or small groups. Would you rather the TA (or maybe the parent helper?) were in charge of a class all day?

I am a parent helper (you'd guessed, maybe) and I am happy give up my time to hear readers or help children with their work. I would have hoped parents would be happy there was an extra pair of hands in class to help their darlings put on impossible pinafore dresses on PE day (I know I am in my children's classes). Hopefully they do not all feel as you do [sigh]

I am happy for parent helpers (not all of whom I know personally, why would I? I don't know all the parents in the class I help in) to write constructive comments in my DCs' books.

As Hula says, hearing readers is not teaching reading, but in any case teachers do a lot more than just teach reading btw, as you'd know if you went in as well.

Oh, am also governor, and CRB checked - and guess what? They even call me in on short notice to cover when teachers are absent - and PAY my unqualified lardy SAHM ass

well quite Greeny.

"intellectual snob with shitty attitude", indeed.

Goodness, is it any wonder that school often find it hard to get helpers?

And is it any wonder that teachers get pissed off with some parents' attitudes, 'bloody teacher' indeed. The inference being that the teacher was sitting on her arse having a coffee!

What amazes me is that people who have so little understanding of what goes on in a classroom ie'What is she teaching if not reading?' feel fully qualified to shout the odds.

I can understand how it feels to be concerned about a child's progress, I have a child on the SEN regester. But I wouldn't benefit his case by having such a negative attitude to the people who are trying to help him in school, and neither will you.

MB I think often parents just have no idea what a classroom is like. I wish fervently that I knew, but they won't let us watch through the windows
ds tells me nothing. I have not got a clue.

re how important parent helpers are, my mate used to do this. She lost count of the children who never had their books signed by the parents, many of the kids used to say, 'My mum says its my teacher's job to listen to me read, not her's'

would like to comment but it seems to have all been said

FA, things have changed so much since I was a child it is almost unrecognisable!

The odd thing about teaching is that people honestly thing that because they were once a student in a classroom they know what it is like to be a teacher! No one things that they know all about medicine because they were once a patient! And yes, parents are expert in their own child, but the old teaching biz is a bit more complicated than that.

MB I did go in and observe for 10 minutes last week, as we were invited - but it was quite a mix as everyone was wandering round doing different things. I am thinking of helping out when ds2 has a few more months on the clock, just to se what happens through the day. It does look wayyy better than things were when I was small. Very encouraging!

I'm puzzled to know what the point would be of a child reading to someone who never gave feedback.

If you don't want feedback, why not just have your child read to a cardboard cutout? The cutout would be available all hours and wouldn't need much training. They would never gossip out of school and would free up the teacher to laze around drinking even more coffee.

Personally, though, I'd rather my child was reading to an interested human being who could reflect back on progress and problems. But I'm funny that way.

Er, If you really don't like it, pilote, speak to the teacher and say under no circumstances is anybody but the teacher, TA or other professional to listen to your child reading.
How this injunction is supposed to benefit your DD is beyond my comprehension, but hey, YOU know best for your child...
I do agree parent helpers shouldn't write more than a basic comment in the reading record (if that), unless trained (not offered at every school). Maybe the upset would make more sense if people knew what was written to cause offense.

I was an untrained, non-CRB checked (for that purpose) parent listener -- we only made a note for the teachers' reference. But I only have a PhD in social sciences so obviously can't read my way out of a paper bag.

Ok lets throw this one into the pot and runaway !!

Perhaps the OP thinks that because it is a parent helper their brain has gone to mush as they are obviously not working full time and may even be a SAHM

I'm running away very quickly ....

Very late as usual. How very unreasonable. You should be grateful, not carping.

Get over it and thank your lucky stars.

"what is her bloody teacher doing all day fgs"?? Er, teaching? Or is your child the only one in the class?

The purpose of writing in the reading record is mainly to show that the child has read to someone, rather than to offer criticism on the reading itself. Most infant teachers I know hear readers during their lunchtimes, and surely any parent would like their child to read as often as possible, to get the practice rather than to impress the teacher - ie it doesn't matter who's listening (presumably they can read!).

Thank god I left teaching. Parents like you used to drive me up the wall.

Run fast and far, Captain.

Agree. What a shitty attitude to have. Do you have any idea how much work teachers have to cope with? To teach YOUR little darling, who is obviously more important that the other 25 children in the class?

Not to mention the KIND mum who is giving up her spare time to help YOUR child learn to read?

You seriously need to get a life.

I think I can understand pilote's point of view.
I have mixed feelings about parent-helpers.
On the one hand they are necessary and a great help in the way the current education system is structured. I also think it's good to include the larger community in school activities.
However, when I find that parent helpers and some TAs are taking on teacher's roles then I become uneasy.
Teachers spend a long time becoming qualified. If I am sending my child to school I would much prefer my child to be educated by a someone who has teaching qualifications than someone who hasn't. Imo there is a huge difference between what a teacher can deliver and a parent helper/TA. I have more confidence in the opinions and judgement of a qualified teacher than the others.
I can't help feeling that parent helpers/TAs are a way of saving money. I don't think this should be the case. Teachers invest years of their time to become teachers. They should be able to find employment at the end of that time. Not be undercut by positions being given to TAs/parent helpers.
As I said before parent helpers have a place in schools. Preparation work and yes, extra reading practice with children. But I agree that the final comments should come from the teacher. They are the ones qualified to comment. Any others are just passing an opinion.
Fwiw, when I was at primary school many moons ago, the teacher listened to all (around 30 of us) the class read every Friday.

I was a parent helper when DS was in reception, and used to read books with children ('hearing them read' being a bit optimistic for most of them at that stage), but helping them recognise sounds, words etc.

I have some sympathy with Pilote - I would not have dreampt of writing anything in their books, and wasn't expected to. I simply initialled it with the date and name and pages of book. I would have felt uncomfortable writing any kind of opinion, or advice or even observation.

I think your objection is reasonable, Pilote, but (as you have said to yourself further down ) don't let your indignation / defensiveness spill into wider feelings about helpers in general or the teacher.

Reading MN it is clear that many, many of us feel twitchy if we think other parents are compariuing our children to thiers etc (especially if ours is the one not racing ahead!) and i can see why one parent would feel sensitive about another parent writing opinions / advice. However good it is that they o in and help