Asking ds's teacher to join in more...

[admylin]

I've just joined (or been elected to join) the PTA for ds's class in year 4. His teacher never joins in or offers activities, she seems to want to rush off as soon as she can get off the school grounds and communication is quite limited. Dd in year 3 on th eother hand always has loads of things on offer and regular letters explaining what is going on like day trips etc. There is also a yearly visit to the theatre around christmas time. I want to write and ask ds's teacher if she would join in with the theatre visit this year as alot of the kids would have loved to have gone last year. Is that reasonable? I just keep thinking, sure the whole school can't go just because the 3rd years always do but it can't harm to ask, or not?

I don't think that is reasonable actually. Some teachers choose to spend a lot of their free-time doing lots of extra-curricular stuff, others have to get off and deal with other commitments, or just choose to have a life outside of school.

Organising school trips is incredibly time-consuming these days with all the bureaucracy and form-filling, collecting money and so on.

If you want to fulfil your role on the PTA, I think you should focus on what you can do, and what you can encourage other parents to do. Maybe you could volunteer to run an after-school club or activity or something?

I do think it is reasonable to request increased communication if you feel you are not being kept in touch with what they are doing in school during school hours.

I think that you have a reasonable right to expect good quality communication from your teachers.

You don't have the right to expect them to run after school clubs etc, as that is outside their contract. If people opt to do it, they are doing it out of the kindness of their hearts, and I don't think you can expect this.

In addition, you don't know what the constraints on her personal life are like. She may be leaving on time to pick up her own children from school. I leave schoo to take dh to have chemotherapy etc

That's what was at the back of my mind really. She definately does choose to not to offer anything like that. I remember the last two time that alot of the kid sin the class were sad that they weren't going and thought I would even offer to accompany them with her.
Now I'm unsure about asking though.

You could ask, but be prepared to be told no.

you can't expect this added extra stuff from her. It isn't in her contract. The responsibility would be hers if she took them. Given that teachers have lost their jobs over accidents over school trips, many teachers now choose not to run them

Dd is definately lucky with her class (infact the whole 3rd year classes) - they went away for 5 days and the teacher told us he had to pay out of his own pocket, no over time etc even though he was on 24 hour duty. I can see that putting alot of teachers off the idea.
I certainly appreciate all the offers and the excellent communication skills he has. It sort of makes it hard on the older dc when one is so lucky - but I see your point. Ds's teacher works part time so I suppose she has even less time to organize things. I'll offer anyway, if she needs help.

When I did my teacher training I had to spend 2 weeks in a Primary school. they had just taken the whole class off to an outward bound trip for the weekend. They were on duty for the whole weekend, none of them had a minute of overtime. they did it because they were nice people and cared for their kids.

Do yo know how many of the parents said 'thanks'? Not one. Out of 30.

I also take a group on a residential every year, for a week (leaving dp in charge of the children). It is wonderful but exhausting. One year it was also my birthday! Like Martianbishop, the number of parents who bother to say thankyou can be counted on about one finger.

I can imagine, that must be really depressing. I notice that in ds's class for example, none of the parents seem to show much interest in what goes on either. We had a summer festival and each year was supposed to put a stand and sell food or anything donated by the parents. I had about 4 offerings from the whole class and only 3 parents turned up to support it. Quite embarrassing really, I wish I could find a way of getting them to join in then the teacher might feel as if it's worth joining in too. If there is no feed back I can see why she doesn't bother.

I work 2 days a week. On one of those days, I pretty much leave school with the pupils due to ridiculous childcare arrangements on that day. If I leave 5 minutes later, I add an hour onto my 15 minute journey.

I think the teacher should be communicative but there are a variety of reason why some teachers don't participate in after school activities - not just because they are lazy arses. You want to see what folks do at home.

Just to add abotu the part time thing. I would guess that I do more pro rata than my full time colleagues do.....

I'm contracted for 32 hrs a week (not a teacher - support staff so pitiful wage). I've done a residential for last two years with yr7-9s.
Sun: 10 pm - set off - 17 hrs on a coach
Mon-Fri am - on duty 24/7 for the whole time. We stay up until we are sure all the kids are asleep, and we get up/showered and dressed before waking them.
Fri am - 17 hrs on coach back again til early hours of Sat morning. I sleep for about 36 hrs when I get back, as I'm so utterly exhausted. Apart from anything else it's a huge responsibility.

We usually get about two thank yous (out of 40+). Most parents apparently think we're lucky and it's a free holiday for us!

Roisin - I know the feeling. In my cupboard at work, I have on the wall, two letters from parents thanking me for 1) residential trip (24/7 for 5 days with 36 children) 2) for 'making a difference' to a child.

They are on my wall because in 10 years, that is all I have received. I don't think I am that bad a teacher either.

Blimey Popsycal, that is terrible. I write a thank you letter to each of my children's teachers every year - and I write to the headteacher too and tell him how great the teachers have been and specifically why. Only once didn't do this when DD1 had a disastrous year with a very uninterested teacher.

I have had two nightmare secondary school trips and viowed never again, before I actually left teaching.

Ist in my first year of teaching - 5 day residental, December, Peak District, Y10 - two children found in compromising situation in dorm and had to be sent home, a coouple others found drunk - and this was a good school!

2nd trip - sixth form day trip to York. Was there less than 30 minutes and teenager was caught by police stealing in HMV. On teacher spent rest of day in police station.

Oh, the joys of school trips!

In 9 years I had no more than a couple of thank you letters from parents, despite working my socks off.

And yes when PT I definitely did way more pro rata than FT staff.

Maybe she rushes off because she has a child of her own to collect.

I now write letters of thanks to DD's teacher and TA at end of year (nursery staff fbefore that) and also the Head when she left this year.

You can't expect teachers to do anything out of school time. Do you realise how much time they have to spend working at home to mark and prepare work, write policies, make worksheets etc etc. As you may have guessed I am a teacher! Before I had my children I used to go to every single out of school event and offered to help at everything as I had no ties at home apart from dh. Now I have 2 children of my own and when I go back after mat leave in 3 weeks time I will be doing nothing over and above what I have to. My own children come first and I would rather spend my early evenings and weekends with them than other people's kids.