Reception child has no interest in learning to read

[Lookingbackatme]

DS has just turned 5 and is in Reception.

We’ve just had parents evening and although we knew he wasn’t doing well with phonics at last November’s meeting, nothing has changed much.

He has zero interest in putting any effort in, both at school and at home. Still on Pink book level. School are just moving onto Stage 3 of phonics and his teacher said he hasn’t even grasped Stage 2 yet.

He can sound most letters easily enough but mostly refuses to attempt to blend the words without a battle. We are not sure if he doesn’t know how to or lacks confidence to try.

He absolutely loves being read to and has a large book collection, goes to the library, has an excellent vocabulary himself (two teachers have commented on it). We’ve bought some phonics stories that we thought he might find more interesting - Lego, animals, the Usborne series etc to no avail.

What else can we do to get him interested? Teacher said he is not going to meet the phonics standards for EY at this rate. No reason to suspect dyslexia or any other learning/reading difficulties as yet they said.

In contrast, he is doing extremely well in maths..

Try rude words, like bum or fart. DS is 5 and we get him to practice writing by allowing him to try to write words like that. Works a charm.

Maybe write something down and tell him its a rude/funny word but you won't tell him what?

If you're on insta have a look at 5minute mum - her son was similar I think and she has lots of fun activities to support developing learning at home.

I’d be inclined to just keep him enjoying the reading and do little and often with the phonics practise.
I remember with my eldest getting really frustrated with him(he didn’t know!) because he just could not get it! He used to get 10 spellings a week of simple words, cat, dog etc and we’d spend ages practising and he just couldn’t grasp it, when reading his books we’d blend a word together and he’d read it, then the word would come up on the next line and he couldn’t recognise it literally two seconds after reading it and we’d have to sound it out together again, it was PAINFUL! We just persevered and I tried to back off a bit and now he’s absolutely fine, he aced his phonics screening at the end of yr1 and is sight reading fluidly now

We tried flash cards and made it into a game if he read the word he got a sweet and we’d compete to see if he could get more sweets than the previous night, he liked that and it made it a bit more fun

Do you have a tablet? There are various reading apps you could try. We’ve used Teach Your Monster to Read. It starts with basic letter sounds and builds up to reading sentences. I have heard other people recommend ‘reading eggs’.

but mostly refuses to attempt to blend the words without a battle. We are not sure if he doesn’t know how to or lacks confidence to try.

Have you tried shouting the sounds out - trick that worked with one of mine seemed he could hear the sounds then - it was a tip from here.

Thanks to everyone's responses which we have been looking at and trying. Sorry this is a bit long..

Now that schools are likely to be closed until September this is going to leave DS(5) in an even worse position with his phonics. He was not looking likely to achieve the EY standards as he was struggling with Stage 2, and now we are in the first week at home and he is mostly just refusing to even try with anything phonics related.

We are using the school's subscription site Purple Mash and Bug Club, as well as Teach Your Monster to Read and Reading Eggs. He will play the games and activities etc but as soon as he has to make an effort to create/sound a word etc, he has a strop and walks off. Similar reaction with Orchard Toys word games and wipe-clean books. Will not even try with flash cards. Hates writing, and his handwriting is mostly awful. We wrote simple short 4-5 word sentences, cut them up, and ask him to look at the words and try and create a sentence - he will sound the letters out but refuse to try and blend the word so that he can try and make a sentence (school suggested this activity to parents).

We've tried to keep it to 10-15 min sessions, and a reward system of if he tries consistently for a week then we will buy him a Lego mini-figure bag (which he loves at the moment and is always asking for a new one). We are not allowing tv before 4pm anyway, and say there will be no tv at all if he doesn't just try. All to no avail.

He absolutely loves books and being read to and the school have asked for parents and kids to read to each other for 20 mins per day. He refuses to try and read to us (even worse reaction than when he was at school).

So, just wondering if anyone has any ideas to help motivate him to try? I want it to be fun for him as I know he struggles, but I'm feeling horrified at the thought that he will be going into Y1 not only having not achieved up to Stage 2 phonics, but will have probably pretty much lost most of that too.

I know everyone is saying that most kids will be in the same position, but that also depends on how keen the child is to learn and their starting point when the schools closed. I keep seeing Facebook posts of friends kids all dutifully doing reading and writing worksheets and activities, and there is my DS flatly refusing and just wanting to play

Some children aren't ready to learn to read until they are a bit older so try not to worry too much. With the right support he'll get there in time.

15 min seems a long time to me to practice phonics in one go. If he likes being read to, why don't you read him a story he likes and ask him to sound out one word on each page you think he should be able to handle? That might help build up his confidence.

Also, my daughter loved the cartoonito Jolly Phonics DVD which goes over all the major phonics sounds and has blending as a fun activity at the end of a story that uses that sound. Each sound has a 5 minute video including 3 words to blend at the end.

Beyond that, just point out words around the house and sound them out yourself without forcing him to blend them and also emphasise its okay to get it wrong and make mistakes.

I have a bit of a perfectionist and I have to point on my mistakes all the time to make her feel better about when she tries something and doesn't get it correct! I'm sure you are already doing this but explain that practicing things we don't know how to do is the only way we get better at them.

Good luck, I'm sure its a lot to juggle on top of everything else.

My suggestion would be to read to him, take the pressure off him to read. Read to him as much as he will accept. Most kids like to be read to. Make up stories too. Mine love stories from their babyhood and toddler years.
Audible stories is offering free books at the moment. Like Winnie to Pooh and lots of other. When in the car, at dinner or maybe while settling to sleep.
Help him enjoy stories. Graphic novels and lots of pictures are good becuse kids can figure out the story of the words get too tricky.
Try not to worry - he will pick up on it.

He’s just turned 5 and just isn’t ready. Lots of children simply aren’t at this age. (I’ll try to avoid the rant about early education in this country and stick to helpful!)
As the PP said just enjoy reading together, listen to books together (my DH had beverage listened to Winnie the Pooh until we had it in the car and he loved it) and let him see you and his dad (if he’s around) reading- they need to see reading as an important thing.
Children at this age are programmed to do, their eyesight tends to be slightly longsighted, they’re full of energy and need todo physical stuff. Not conducive to learning to read. Perhaps focus on fine motor skills- play-doh, Lego, bead threading, jigsaws to help the handwriting?

beverage = never!!

II would treat the next few weeks as a chance to let the pressure off. Go back to stuff he can do. Like single letter sounds and reward him for doing it. Let him feel successful and only move on to the next stage very slowly.

This isn't phonics, but it is something my kids loved at that age. I'd read a story, and they would pick a word to read, like the protagonist's name. Every time I get to 'their word' they say it. My eldest invented it, but it is actually quite useful for helping them look at the text when you are reading rather than just listening. After a while they have about 3 words each, which is funny. Also, don't worry, kids develop at different rates. My little one went to school unable to write the first letter of his name correctly, and couldn't recognise all the letters. He is doing well now!

Do you know what phonics scheme they are using at school? Ruth Miskin is releasing daily phonics lessons from Read, Write, Inc on Youtube which include learning the sounds and blending. They are only about 10 min and they encourage audience participation. Might that take the pressure off, since it's someone else doing the teaching? My other suggestion is Alphablocks if you can get it on iplayer at the moment.

I was going to ask whether he follows when you read to fit or does he just listen? If he follows, what about making a 'mistake' when you read a word you know he can read? See if he corrects you. Or, if he has a book where he knows every single word of the story - you know, the one where you can never skip a page because he will know- and again , change or leave out a decodable word. A lot of children like to correct an adult's error. But I'd definitely try to keep it fun And not pressure him too much or you risk turning him off reading altogether.

Teacher here with reception aged boy who struggles with blending to read - alphablocks on I-player is great!

Download some apps - twinkl phonics is free, look for other free phonics apps. Look at jolly phonics videos on YouTube for songs and rhymes with actions which are really memorable, if you can do the action and show the letter can he say the sound it makes?

Can he orally blend - if you say C, a, t does he know it makes cat? If not practise that.

Can he hear rhyming words? Continue a rhyming sequence? Cat, mat, sat, hat...?

I'd say definitely take the pressure off but keep playing games with him. I've got some cards with all the sounds on and we have a game where if my child can say the correct sound, he "wins" that card. If not, I win it. Then we count up our cards and see who has the most! Can he beat his score? Takes 5mins then done. Keep to one side a few he doesn't know, say the sound while pointing to each letter, and play a game where you mix them up and he has to point to the letter when you say the sound. Can also do that the other way round - he says the sound and you point to the card. Make mistakes - does he notice? A lot of children love correcting adults' "mistakes"!

Use tv/youtube but use it wisely. Don't tie it to phonics even as a reward. If he thinks of the phonics apps as a game he might be more engaged. There's no point creating arguments around it or you risk him being turned off phonics "lessons" or games because he's getting punished.

Look on the phonicsplay website for games and resources - pirate themed buried treasure is a good one and the games can be selected to suit all phases. Don't forget phase 1 activities - sound discrimination, can he say what different sounds are? Play I spy. What sound does spiderman start with? Batman? Hulk? Or whatever he's interested in/playing with at the time! If he doesn't engage, you say it. Keep your tone light and encouraging and back off if he isn't interested.

Above all keep reading to him. Lots of good suggestions upthread too. Try not to worry - he's still very little. They make lots of progress in the summer term which unfortunately is probably not going to happen now, but in September he will probably have made quite good progress if you do a bit every day.

is there a comic he likes, (old gimmer here) like the beano, alpha blocks or whatever to get him interested in looking at words not just spelling them out iyswim

We had this.

In all honesty, my biggest worry was that she'd actually and up hating reading if we pushed it.

So I backed right off

Went back to just reading to her for pleasure and looking at pictures with no pressure.

I was fully prepared to be quite firm with the school about this, but actually they didn't disagree. A term or so later it seemed to click. And she is now a very avid reader.

My ds absolutely hated phonics, and rebelled at every turn. His reception teacher and yr1 teacher were horrified (I well remember his yrR teacher being very upset that he wasn't motivated by stickers). We kept reading to him, got him to write shopping lists of the things he wanted. By yr 3 he was more than caught up, by yr6 his reading age was off the scale, and in yr7 his leaving middle school award was 'for reading all the time'.

I would honestly take all the pressure right off. Read loads with him, do the free Audible books on Audible stories, cook together so you are reading the recipe, write shopping lists, to do lists, look at instructions to build lego - anything with words. Watch AlphaBlocks, but don't push him to say anything about it

@Lookingbackatme I know this thread is from 2 years ago, but if you are still around I'd love to know how your son is now x

@Lillyflow thanks for asking! DS(7) is now in Year 3 and it’s been a hard road but he is getting there with his reading. Towards the end of Year 1 he suddenly decided to try and start reading which was a huge turnaround for him. He’s made slow but steady progress and towards the end of Year 2 the school said they think he is showing dyslexia traits; we are all adopting a wait-and-see approach and in the meantime he has 20-minute phonics sessions x 4 per week at school and then the class TA listens to him read most days. He has also been given a yellow overlay to put over text when he reads which is something that is used for dyslexia. He said he finds this useful but recently he left it at school over the weekend and he seemed to read just the same as without. I mentioned this to his teacher and they have checked this and agreed.

I don’t think he has dyslexia (doesn’t run in the family either); I think he has experienced a perfect storm of refusing to read until the end of Year 1 (so an almost 2-year delay); then Covid hit and all the affects of that, and consequently he is behind. The school said he is making good progress and is more or less now on a par with Year 2 reading level. He tries hard to read - no reluctance to try at all now.

He has just been assessed last week so we are waiting to hear the results. If necessary we will still pay for him to have a dyslexia assessment but the Senco said there is no rush for this as he is progressing well.

@Lookingbackatme Thank you for coming back with an update :). So glad to hear he is making progress.