What age did you let your child go home by themselves?

[Battenburg11]

My DD is 10 and a half and in preparation for the transition to secondary school in September, we’re thinking when is a good time for her to start making the journey home from school herself.

Journey would take around 30 minutes with two short bus journeys and then a 5 minutes walk to front door. The first bus is opposite her school which takes her to tube station where she would wait for another bus.

I’m thinking of waiting until she’s 11 in the summer but would welcome your opinions. Thanks

Now seems like a good time. DD started going to and from school some days herself from summer term shortly before her 11th birthday (just over a mile's walk away, about 30 mins) as we knew she'd need to do similar for secondary. We might have started earlier only she has a younger brother so was travelling with him and au pair anyway, but we started letting her go alone for pre- and after-school commitments when her brother wasn't travelling at the same time.

If your DD is responsible and has been doing the route for years, no reason why not. Plus it means travelling by herself isn't this sudden new thing on top of everything else for secondary.

About 9, but it was only a short walk with only one main road to cross.
I think you are right to get your dd used to the journey now though, so there's one less new thing for her to get used to when she moves up to secondary school.

Year 5

We’ve always taken and collected DD by car so she hasn’t been on a bus home but I’d like to build up her independence and confidence by getting her to make her journey home once school finishes but I’m not sure at what age is a good time.

DD is very sensible and mature for her age but as a parent, it’s always a worry but I know she will have to when she is in secondary school.

If she is sensible and mature your half way there, no harm in reminding her of things that may go over their heads though, especially if your child is kind, like if a stranger drops something infront of her and then asks her to help get them to the car, or she is not to go off with someone to help them in anyway, or to go with someone because your in hospital and they will take them to you. Standard things but best to just go over it for both your peace of mind.

My ten year old randomly walks home from school here or there, no more than twice a month (but her school is 2 streets down)

Ds was 9

Mine are 8&9 and walk to and from school themselves but ....we live next door 🤣

I'm usually at school collecting his Y4 brother, so my Y6 doesn't get much choice but to come home with me.
He has come home on his own when the pair of them have finished at different times (this is the first year he could- we moved schools over the summer. It wasnt realistic from the previous school- noone did it). However, when it has been dark and he was coming back late, he has asked me to come back out for him.

So, I'd suggest dong the route with her a couple of times, as it's not a route she has done before, and then let her do it alone once it will be properly light when she gets back.

We had to collect the kids from their teacher until secondary.
Only you can tell if she's ready. I would wait till secondary but whenever do a trial run with her a couple times so she's comfortable with the journey especially if she's only gone by car before.

Totally Gogreen. I’ve mentioned to DD about not talking to strangers etc but there’s always that worry they’ll forget. DD is polite and considerate but I need to make her more streetwise. I may look into getting her a personal alarm or something.

Mine was about 10, I think, but I would have been nervous about 2 bus journeys. Saying that, I think it does depend on how used they are doing it. I used to collect dd with the car. If we caught the bus everyday and she knew what she was about I might have felt differently.
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Dd got a school bus home.
She would come home from the bus herself about 7/8.

DS age 11 (yr 6) does short tube journeys by himself. We built up gradually. Firstly doing the journey with an adult but in another carriage, then with an adult on the train behind, then with an adult putting him on the tube and another meeting him, etc etc. He now navigates a familar route (20 mins) by himself.

PS - we moved - prior to that I collected with the car, after that she had 2 roads to cross. And then she had a key. Last year of Primary.

Would you start off with meeting her halfway? After the first bus journey maybe? And build up from there.

Yr 5. Either 45 min walk or 15 min walk plus bus. But I spent a good while catching bus and walking route (maybe a term? End of yr 4) daily beforehand with him so it was very familiar whereas before we has taken car.

I'd think about when school finishes and when it gets dark. As soon as there is a good window start her practicing then.

My ds will be able to bus around this area soon but that’s cause he’s done the journey lots with adults. I’d start by busing with your dd for a term.

Could you maybe wait until the evenings are a bit lighter and then work up to it. Eg she gets the first bus and you get her from the tube station and then after a week or so she gets the second bus. And/or do the journey with her a few times as PP have said.

Thanks for your replies. Most definitely we’ll do a few trial runs when evenings are lighter but I wanted to get an idea st what age other parents allow their child to go solo. I don’t think any of the children in my child’s class go home by themselves but personally I want my child too to prepare for when she starts secondary school and even by then, we’ll be doing a few trial journeys to get her familiar with the routes.

Dt 10 in year 6 have just started walking home together (0.2miles) rural area. We spent last term walking to school and them telling me when it was safe to cross etc.
I think it's like all milestones it depends on the individual (one of my Dt was ready before the other). It's about the preparation so when Dt go to secondary school they'll be catching the bus so in the summer term I shall send them on the bus as a practice run and build up distance etc.

From the start of Year 5 for DS, so he was 9. To be fair in Year 4 he was often “picked up” but then rode his bike home whilst me or someone else walked/ran or drove. He’s fine. Some days I take him in then he walks back but otherwise he rides there and back each day, around 1.3 miles each way.

I would wait until the evenings are lighter. I think lots let their kids do it in Y5 or 6 but it tends to be more straight forward journeys and or they're doing with a friend or sibling. Realistically most kids make their own way back from secondary and not much will change in a year but I'd personally keep taking her until it's light.