To be frustrated at Ill kids going in

[Shelbygirl15]

Last week my child went to school with a yucky cold on the first day of it. I felt absolutely awful about it and she was sent home within half an hour for being peaky and streaming eyes. I was glad she was sent home because I wanted her to be home, but she had already had 2 days off last month and I was having abit of an attendance panic.

She's back now and the teachers off Ill and it sounds like there's lots going around. What has struck me is my friend's son has had the worst cough and cold for three weeks and has had zero days off. Not even when he was coughing until he was swallowing his sick on the way to school. He's not been sent home and managed to get through the day. He had a toilet accident yesterday at school and she had to go change him. He went swimming last night then this morning she tells me he had the squits last night but he's ok today so he's gone in. He was holding hands with my child minutes before she told me. So now my DD is at risk of getting a stomach bug when she's only just gone back. It will be my luck we will all be ill in the next few days. She's so prone to it. Just pees me off really that people don't want to keep their children off so they have good attendance. They responsible parents who keep theirs off get the rubbish attendance!

The system exists to prevent people who don't care about the child's education taking the piss. Unfortunately there are many of these. It has the consequence of frightening parents with genuine reasons for keeping their kids off. It also negatively impacts disabled children and children with difficult family lives who struggle to achieve good attendance for non health related reasons.
People are not in the wrong for sending children with colds into school. But if that child is really ill, or needs some TLC (maybe asthma) or has a tummy bug, then they should stay off. It requires a common sense approach.
When the children are very small it is SO depressing they always seem to be ill, but that period of time doesn't last for ever as with a bit of luck they get stronger.

I really resent people using someone else's personal tragedy to win an argument: a child died, which wasn't the schools fault, or the parents fault, or the parents whose kids had colds fault, it was one of those cold hard horrible things. If you send your child into school with a cold you are not an irresponsible parent.

I could get a cold from my child or their friend and die, I mean I have lung cancer and I'm low on the old immunity. Do I want them to miss out on education just in case a rare one in a million rare complication occurs? No. That would be crazy. Illness is scary, but the application of critical thinking and common sense is all that is required here.

I know I am a bad parent for it (well it's also good that I work and provide for my kids so two sides to everything) but yeah my kids have to be real sick before I let them have the day off. I work and DH works and since I am a teacher, school tends to think having school holidays off is enough time off.

I mean maybe 10 years plus of working in a secondary school has made me cynical when it comes to kids saying they are ill but I just don't worry when my child sneezes or coughs.

Colds are one thing, but a tummy bug can ruin weekends and holidays for whole families!

Those bullying attendance letters give people mixed messages

Colds are one thing, but a tummy bug can ruin weekends and holidays for whole families!

Have you read the thread?

I agree the failure lies within the school's who have these attendance policies that are basically a massive threat of what will happen to you if your child drops below ten days off in total over a year. My child's at 92% because she's had four days off in 2 months. But it's winter and it's the time of the year when all kids get Ill. It should go back up as the year goes on. But right now it's low. Then there's risks of her picking up stomach bugs etc. Probably just in time to ruin Christmas!

I do agree we have no choice but to send them in with colds. The trouble is 4-5 year olds might be fairly well and able to cope. But come lunchtime they could do with a second dose of calpol and the school's can't do that. So that has to be considered. I tend to give calpol with colds for two days even without a temp. because it helps with a fuzzy head and the general rubbish feelings. As adults we all know that you can get waves of feeling rough with a cold in the afternoon etc. It can be a few days
At a time and you can easily rack up 6-8 Colds when you are little. So roughly that's 6 days off a year if you keep them home with a bad day with a cold. Then they could get 1-2 tummy bugs a year that mean another 3-5 days off. Then there's hand foot and mouth, impertigo, chickenpox etc. It's very easy to go below 95% in the infant's especially. Yet it's something you are punished for.

But seriously it's selfish even as a working parent to make your child suffer. If they have a bad tummy they need the sofa or their bed until they are recovered. It's one of the roles of being a mum taking care of your kids when ill and yes they will inconvenience you with their bugs a few times a year.

I just wish people would think about other people abit more. You don't want to be the reason 15 kids get a stomach bug in the next two weeks. Just keep them off and make sure they are recovered.

@Aquilla yep I agree. They are the most inconvenient horrible things. Loosing control of your body is not nice. It must be awful for the kids who end up vomiting allover the classroom too. I couldn't be a teacher as I would not cope with that happening.

Ok it's all well and good to say it's my job to their for them and I should keep them off but I can't and there are a lot of other people who can't just drop whatever their doing to be a mum all the time.

On the flip side this whole attendance thing is just a requirement don't get worried about it. They have to harass you if attendance falls or Ofsted gets on their case but they're not going to fine you or take you to court unless it drops a lot lower. Schools are aware kids get sick and they're not going to call social services over it it's just Ofsted who aren't aware.

jacqueshammer
Yes, thanks - I have read the thread. Op sent her kid in with a bad cold then got sent home.
Op's mate's kid had a bad cold/cough and later on a tummy bug and mate sent kid swimming and to school. Squits=tummy bug/flu, no?

Then I made the point that while sending a kid in with a cold was often excusable, sending them out into the general population with a stomach bug is totally unacceptable. Hence, agreeing with op's post.

Then I made the point that while sending a kid in with a cold was often excusable, sending them out into the general population with a stomach bug is totally unacceptable

Yes, you also said "just a cold" vs "ruined weekend".

Your "just a cold" could well be a hospital stay for DD which probably trumps a "ruined weekend".

If you send you child to school with a full on cold/cough (not just a snivel etc) then yes, you're not adequately considering the consequences.

@Shelbygirl15 OP our school is happy to give Calpol / ibuprofen if we've signed a consent form, which I'm very thankful for. My DC's have had a few sports injuries over the year that have required a dose of painkillers halfway through the day, and that has been done with no issues.

I think though it's not as simple as cold vs d&v and who is to blame.
Because hand foot and mouth can be just cold like symptoms or include the rash and cause d&v.
Adenoviruses can cause - ear infection, uti, d&v, cold syptoms and croup. So can be transmitted by the coughing or d&v.
So 1 child will have to be off the 48h tonprevent spread because of d&v symptoms but it continues because the classmates are coughing virus everywhere.
Also adults often get a bout of loose stools and think ohh eaten something or too much caffeine. But now i have dc i know it's likely their d&v bug but im just not that ill. Im convinced dp just gets a headache. So adults and kids who dont get that ill are spreading it anyway.

If it is hfm it's contagious in poop for 1m+.

Im starting to suspect swimming pools of spreading d&v as we've been ill twice recently and both times confirmed V in the pool either when we were there or a week or so before.
Have to say it comes on suddenly so i can see how parents get caught out and the kid V in the pool.