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Primary education

Join our Primary Education forum to discuss starting school and helping your child get the most out of it.

Home visits and co-parenting

2 replies

Tippletopple · 07/09/2019 00:13

Hope someone might be able to give some advice: DS is about to start reception and his mother and I are divorced. We currently have an amicable 60:40 co-parenting arrangement, with her being the 60% primary caregiver (as I work full time and she does not).

I just found out DS and ExW had a home visit from the school. I don't mind this at all and understand its a good thing, however I've since been told that one of the reasons for home visits is that parents can have a chance to meet the teacher and discuss any concerns, ask questions, etc.

As I have my son 40% of the time, AIBU to feel concerned I haven't had this opportunity myself? Having not been there I'm not sure exactly if having the chance to meet the teacher myself would have made much of a difference however on the other hand I worry the school are just making a snap judgement of "Mum's the caregiver" when a significant proportion of the caregiving is actually done by myself. I wasn't even made aware home visits were actually made until after the event - my Ex-wife didn't feel she needed to give me a heads-up beforehand and only told me after.

Hoping I'm just making a mountain out of a molehill here. Any parents in a similar situation?

OP posts:
BackforGood · 07/09/2019 00:28

In truth, it is for the school to meet the child. It doesn't really matter who is looking after them. Some dc whose parents work full time are visited when Gran is looking after them, and some, while they are in Nursery. I wouldn't choose this as a 'thing' to get worked up over.

CrazyCatLady159 · 07/09/2019 00:34

The school only visit the home they they have on record that the child lives at. As she has 60% they would go there.
I'm assuming she filled out the paperwork with her address ....

You could always call the school and go in to meet the teacher if you want too ...

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