Reception class exclusions

[Albert01]

Hi all,
I’m new to Mumsnet- hoping someone out there is able to offer some advice (please).
My son has just turned 5- he started school last September. He attends a relatively small out of city school. He has been excluded 9 times in the last year and is currently on a re-integration plan, meaning he is only accessing school for two hours a day.

My son has Anxiety, whereby he is hyper vigilant. He is in fight or flight mode all of the time.. usually presented as fight.
He has hurt other children, damaged the class room and hit out at a teacher.

Of course, I don’t condone this behaviour and agree that he needs sanctions- however the exclusions are not seen (by him) as a punishment.

He is no longer able to access the class with his peers and spends a lot of time in isolation.

I have requested an assessment in view of an EHCP for emotional and behaviour needs and he has been referred to CAMHS.

My son knows right from wrong, he is able to socialise and he attends sports clubs etc-

Has anyone has similar experiences (I feel so alone in this)...

Thankyou for taking the time to read this and for any advice- it will be very gratefully received.

My first question would be why is he so very anxious? At 5, I wouldn’t be inclined to say anxiety is a diagnosis, but a symptom of something else. Does that make sense?

Hi,
Yes, total sense- he has PTSD. Sorry, I should have said in post. Thankyou for replying xx

I'm sorry to hear you are going through this.

Yes I have been here. I went through similar a long time ago. My little boy hit another around the head with a cricket bat. He was left unsupervised and decided to be a helicopter. He was generally a bit out of control sensory seeking type behaviour.

This was reception and the first few months. They quickly decided he could only attend shorter mornings for the first year and they quickly recruited a 1:1.

Things were so different before austerity cut backs. I didn't need to get a Statement (old version of ehcp) because the funding was plentiful back then.

The good news is that now if you do the following you'll likely get help:

Make a telephone appointment with IPSEA, hard to get but keep refreshing the booking page a few times a day.
They give you the legal side and very good support.

Insist that your child is supported by the SEN person/ department and that they are doing a plan, do and review approach. This is essential to get help and funding and can take years if they are not kept on task.

Ask for a TAF meeting (team around the family), this will help you hold people accountable and have an action plan for the next TAF meeting. Keeps everyone on task.

Ask for a referral to Camhs via your GP.

Contact your local SENDIASS, you can find them in your county council directory or call switchboard. They support you getting the right help for your child and may attend TAF meetings if required.

Do everything, be that parent, there is so little funding available now you have to push. Your child sounds as though he needs an EHCP to help him access education and the sooner the better.

Good luck x

Thankyou theorchardwhisperer, great advice, much appreciated xx

The fact that son has been excluded 9 times in reception must surely be a red flag for the school that there is an issue with your son that the school and you as a family need to get to the bottom of.
I agree that getting a TAF started is a sensible move and that you need to push the school to get more evaluation of your son carried out to see if they can establish what is the trigger points for your son's poor behaviour.

OP, this sounds so hard for you. I have no experience of this but know of the charity Just For Kids Law which might help justforkidslaw.org/about-us/overview/

I know nothing of this directly. But I am confident I have read stuff relating to adoption on hyper vigilance and the classroom, which I think might help. So try some searches with adoption in or look on Adoption UK and you may possibly find some useful leaflets.

However tbh I am assuming you and the school have tried all the 'obvious' things like safe spaces etc, plus positioning him on the side or wherever he feels safest.
I guess a reception class must be worst for anxious traumatised children due to the free flow chaotic nature.

Hi OP, have you heard of Therapeutic Parenting? A lot of social workers and therapists recommend this for children with trauma. We have had foster children in the wider family and were advised to parent in this way and for the school to teach in this way as normal strategies are proven not to work with children who have experienced trauma. One thing they talk about is that children who have experienced trauma are typically working at about half their biological age. So if your son is 5, emotionally he might be closer to 2.5. if you look at his behaviour in that context it changes the way you see things. I don't know your situation or whether it would be appropriate but there is a free Facebook group you can join, if you search for the National Association of Therapeutic Parents. There's is loads of good advice on there, especially around school.

Thankyou all so so much for your advice. It’s been very gratefully received xxx

Are you in a position to home school?
If you were, it could give the security he seems to need.
There are lots of Home Ed groups you could go to, so it could be quite social but in a more controlled way. You could still follow the national curriculum, but you wouldn't have to.
Then think about re-integrating eg for Juniors, or upper Juniors, which will be more ordered (or even Secondary).

If being in school is triggering his PTSD to this extent it seems cruel to keep him in there until it can be treated. Being constantly hypervigalent is stressful and exhausting. Poor little boy - and poor you and school trying to deal w it.

Could you start the summer holidays early or get him signed off by your GP? Anything to boot CAMHS up the bum to see him sooner.

I have a child with SEN and sensory issues who was excluded twice in reception due to dangerous behaviour. But the school engaged as many agencies as they could, started the EHCP process and while this was going on he attended school in the mornings and they funded an interim one to one. What are the school doing ?

Has he been seen by an Ed Psych ? There are waiting lists at most schools but an excluded child usually jumps right to the top of that list.

Does the borough have a behavioural team who comes and observes? They should have been engaged straightaway.

Exclusion is hard. DS has a very well behaved NT twin which made it very difficult and he was just too young to understand anything that was going on. In our case it was clearly explained to us that at his age exclusion shouldn't be seen or explained as a punishment, it was simply to keep other children safe and stop a situation spiralling. It was discussed whether the school could manage his behaviour or whether another setting should be considered.

Fortunately with correct support and help with his educational needs he reintegrated nicely, thankfully he bonded well with his year 1 teacher and LSA and now in year 2 he does still shout a lot at school and friendships are challenging but he is no longer aggressive and academically is only slightly behind the curve.

The reason I mention Ed Pysch and behavioural teams (other than CAMHS) is because you need as many reports as possible for an EHCP and if the school drags their heels with these the whole process will be delayed. In themselves they don't fix anything.

What have the school done to support him? Excluding a traumatised 5 year old child is ridiculous. Could you consider a different school?

I can assure you that “pre austerity” schools were never awash with money for 1:1 supervision in YR. Neither should YR be chaotic. If it is then teaching is poor and the school needs to improve the YR setting to be inclusive.

I agree that the school should be well on the way to seeking advice and he should see an Ed Psych who would also give classroom
management advice. I think it’s a horrible situation for both of you and it’s not acceptable. You and the school need to work together to see what needs to be in place next year. Therefore ask to see the Sendco and get the ball rolling!

I am really surprised that your DS has been diagnosed with PTSD without CAMHS input. You could ask the GP to chase the referral up.

Are all the exclusions official? Don't take him off the school roll OP, if you do so getting the LA to provide help becomes much harder. If he is too unwell for school getting him medically signed off would be best, and would mean the LA would have to provide provision e.g. Home tutoring or online provision.

Bubbles, I think Teen probably meant that because reception is free flow provision the classrooms are noisier and less structured/predictable, which can be really hard for traumatised children in comparison to older years classrooms where is more whole class learning and sitting at desks. That was/is the case for my DS, who has PTSD and had a 1:1 before the EHCP was finalised.

10broken Yes, my use of the word 'chaotic' was indeed shorthand for the 3 line explanation you provided. It was not an aspersion on the teacher's classroom management.

You describe it perfectly Teen, chaotic is exactly how many children with a history of trauma perceive such environments. My DS is out of school now but he definitely found the environment of the reception classroom harder than the more traditional setting of Y1. In the same way unstructured times like lunch and break are often difficult for such children. OP does your DS' school provide support at lunchtime etc?

What have the school done so far? Are they getting any outside agencies to help? (behavioural team, specialist teachers, early help etc) Can you see any pattern to what is causing the issues he is getting excluded for? There has to be something causing these incidents, the sooner you know what the easier it will be to deal with.

You said he attends sports clubs and can socialise there so is it possible that the more structured setting in year 1 will help anyway? I've worked with quite a few children who simply cannot cope with the free flow nature of reception, breaks and lunchtimes.