Relocating with year 3/4 child - any experiences?

[dimmu]

Hi everyone,

We have made the big decision to relocate from inner London to another large city this summer. Our current area has become a hotspot for knife crime and gang/drug related activities and the secondary schools in the area aren't great. As with so many others in London, a nice house on a nice street is beyond our reach, and we have therefore decided to move somewhere where we can afford the suburban dream.

Our flat is now under offer and I am having some wobbles, mainly because of DD1. She's currently year 3 and has a wonderful circle or friends and is doing really well in her outstanding primary school. She understands our reasons for the move, and we have included her in discussions but she is still sad to leave mainly because of her friends. She's quite sociable and seems to make friends easily so I hope she will be ok and will settle in.

We really want to move now as DD2 will start school next year, so at least we only have one school place to secure. Also would like DD1 to be all settled in the new city and have friends before she starts secondary school in a few years.

As I said I am now having some last minute wobbles and I guess I am really after some reassurance... How was it for your child to move schools/cities at this age (8/9)? Did it take them long to settle in a new school? Is there anything we can do to help her settle once we have moved?
We are moving during the summer holidays, I am taking the whole August off as parental leave/holiday to get to know the new city and spend time with the DDs and then the girls will start in a new school/nursery from September.

My oldest dd was 8 when we moved and she settled in fine. She started her new school in September and made some new friends fairly easily. One thing i would suggest is signing her up for some out of school activities (eg: brownies, dance, football) before the term starts so she has friends out of school and knows people in the area. have a couple of playdates with her friends from these activities. all the best OP x

I think with a sociable, confident girl you should be fine. I know a few people who have moved around that time for less good reasons than yours and it's been fine. She'll still have three years so plenty of time to establish new friendships. My friend moved hers at that age and it was fine. Within about half a term it was as if she'd always been there.

We moved about now, when ds was in yr 3. He was confident and doing well in his old school. Just after we moved his new school got a poor ofsted report and I panicked. But he settled in fine and is doing really well. His new school helped him adapt really quickly and he has a lovely new set of friends.

We moved when ds1 was in year 4. We moved also from London. I think it helped because his old school and new school were similar in ethos, size etc and he soon made friends and settled in. Ds2 was 4 so started the following school year.
I agree with pp who suggested out of school clubs. My ds also had to change his cubs group but the new group was great and he settled in there really well.
It’s such a worry at the time but honestly it was the best thing we ever did and I don’t regret it for a moment.

Thank you all for your responses, I really appreciate them, and feel a bit better now about uprooting DD1. Definitely a good idea to try and find some out of school clubs for her, perhaps even a local summer holiday scheme if there is one.

We moved in the summer hols last year - DS was going into year 1 so younger than yours but what worked incredibly well for us was: once I knew what school he would be going to I joined the school parents Facebook group and asked to meet up with people from his class in the local park in August. This meant on the first day he has already met some kids and established some friendships. If made it so much easier for him and too a lot of angst away from the first day and days.

I moved my son in Jan year 4 after his current school appeared to be crumbling (so many teachers leaving) - I was worried because he's a sensitive kid and struggled to make friends in reception when he didn't know anyone. He LOVES his new school. He LOVED being 'the new kid' and getting all the attention. And now he has a brand new group of friends.

Slightly different situation to yours as it was within the same town, but the school move was very positive.

Our eldest went into year 3 in the January having moved across the country. She found it harder than the others but soon settled once she realised much was the same. She adored her new teacher, which helped.