DS (7) lacks focus, can't sit still, is there a deeper problem?

[Lorelei2]

I'm reaching out because I want to help my DS (7) focus better at his classwork, not get distracted as much. He's fiddling all the time and can't sit still. He's not listening to the teacher properly and is failing to finish his tasks and he gets very upset when he can't do something and doesn't ask for help. The teacher also told us she invited a Learning Support Assistant to observe his constantly fidgeting behaviour in PE to see if they had any concerns. What he does with his body seems to be the opposite of what the teacher is asking them to do. She says he has potential and his reading and comprehension is very good but he lacks focus. I know this doesn't sound too serious but I am worried that he won't achieve what he should be able to and will get bullied for his awkward behaviour. What can I do to get him to realise he has to do his work properly or he'll fall behind. Any help greatly appreciated.

Ask the school what they are thinking wrt the learning support observation.

How would you feel about a suggestion that he should be evaluated for ADD or ADHD? I suspect this is something on the school's radar.

This sounds like my nearly 8 y old and the school have referred my dc for assessment re. possible add/adhd. The questionnaire we had to fill in summed my dc up completely, apart from the last bit about oppositional defiance disorder, which I believe can be a strand of ad(h)d.

Things that work for us are short, written checklists of things they need to do to get ready for school/bed that they tick off as they go, fiddle and fidget toys, written instructions that they have to read and follow for when new maths topics are introduced, being allowed to read instead of going out to play (reading is an area where my dc can hyperfocus and will help calm most instances of anger or giddiness) and working in smaller groups within and outside the class so there are fewer disruptions.

thanks mathanxiety I'll ask the school. I believe it may be on the school radar.
I like the idea of short, written checklists KeptTheBeachesShipwreckFree that's a great idea.
I also wonder if he struggles with maturity because he is the youngest in the class. There are some kids who are almost a year older than him, quite a few deferred kids.
We did ask whether he could be deferred when he started school but they said no, he'd have to have been psychologically assessed and a good reason given. And, as far as they were concerned they felt he'd be fine.
However my DH and I both knew that he was immature and difficult to manage, the nursery teachers had already complained to us that he doesn't listen at all.
So when we had to send him to school we were worried he'd feel anxious if he couldn't do something and it was perhaps because he should've been in the year below.
We still worry about this and wish we'd maybe tried harder to have him deferred.
Has anyone else had this issue with a child who they believe should have been deferred and are still worried that they are not coping as well as they should.

A friend's DS, aged 8, is very bright (exceptional maths ability, pretty good reading/comprehension etc) but is easily distracted, fidgety, uncoordinated and struggles to get his thoughts down on paper. He has recently been diagnosed with dyspraxia. It might be an idea to read up on dyspraxia as well as ADHD/ADD and see if it resonates at all – though of course, any diagnosis should be made by a professional and not MN 😊

I wouldn’t get hung up on thought of him being in the wrong year group. The chances of him being allowed to move down a year at this stage in state school are vanishingly small. Focus your efforts on fighting to get him the help he needs.

Make sure you have an eye exam too and check for any visual issues. I’m an Optom myself, but also from a personal point of view, my DD’s concentration is shockingly bad when she isn’t wearing her glasses.

Hi, my DD is similar age. in her class, they have 'wobble' cushions and noise cancelling headphones for kids who are easily distracted. My DD went through a fidgety phase, and I got permission to let her have a tangle to have in her hands whilst listening to instructions. www.toys4hands.com/english-1/tangle-toys/

My 6 year old is the same, constantly fidgeting, not focusing and often not finishing work. He's also youngest in his year and looking back I wish we had deferred him. It doesn't help that he's in a composite class and therefore there's some kids practically 2 years older than him so he stands out even more.

His teacher said his focus is slowly getting better as he grows older. I'm just hoping it's a maturity thing. I also think getting him to a couple of after school activities is helping him. His teacher lets him fidget with his jumper because she thinks it helps him concentrate. Maybe some non obstructive fidgeting would help your boy concentrate?

underneath i agree about the glasses. But annoyingly they are always falling down dc nose which also has tge affevt of making them tired.

I think it's a huge disadvantage being youngest. But especially because in this sort of situation it is hard to see if there is an issue or if they are acting their age. Also if children get a diagnosis (adhd after 6yo) obviously they are further up the school at the same age before support