Mummy I look chinese!

[pigleto]

ds who is in reception came home today and pulled his eyes with his fingers and declared that he looked chinese. I told him that he did not look remotely like his friend who is chinese and that he was just making a funny face.

Now I am wondering if he is going to turn into the Duke of Edinburgh, or a racist bully, or get into trouble at school for racist behaviour. Or if I need to speak to the teacher or if I am overreacting. Please help.

I'd have a little talk with him and explain that some people might find his behaviour offensive even if he means nothing nasty by it, and ask him to stop it so he doesn't upset anyone. Whether I'd speak to the teacher would depend on whether your son was acting on his own initiative or copying a classmate. If lots of children are behaving like that, the school needs to do something. I wouldn't worry that your son is turning into a racist bully - it's unlikely that he intends to cause offence.

I did a short history on the evils of racism which I think went completely over his head. I discussed it with dh who thinks that I should have a quick word with his teacher in case his friend from Singapore is being made to feel victimised. I don't think there is anything malicious about it but I wouldn't want it to escalate.

Thanks Hallgerda, I think he has been copying his friends, it is not something that he is likely to have come up with on his own. I was just a bit taken aback, and I think I made a mess of the "talk" that I had with ds. I don't know whether to go over it again with him tomorrow or just to let it lie.

Probably best to let it lie for the moment, but have a brief word with the teacher. I'm sure the school will go over the history of racism at great length at some point.

(You'll know when they've done it because your son will come home and tell you about how "the pink people wouldn't let the brown people sit at the front of the bus" while you and your DH feel distinctly uncomfortable and wonder what the right terminology is and whether you've been getting it wrong all these years.)