Non Competative Sports Days. I hate them

[castrolgtx]

Everyday the same children come out of school with certificates for good writing/reading/maths etc, but sports day can't be competative in case children are upset when they loose.
At the mum of two sports mad sons it drives me mad as it's their one chance to shine.
Anyone else agree?

one of my children is a dreadful loser. He also happens to be OK at sport. It's not that he hasn't 'learnt' how to lose, just that he hasn't quite got the emotional maturity to handle losing yet (something, I am hoping, will kick in as he gets older).

There's no point teaching children a life lesson about losing if they aren't emotionally mature enough to deal with it and ime, at infant age, there are still plenty of children who haven't quite got there yet.

If you want your child to compete in sport from an early age, there are normally local clubs and the like that you can join.

Agree the age of the child is very significant

Exactly foxinsocks. What's the problem with taking your dcs to a sports club if you/they are desparate to compete.

God I remember sports day. Spending all bloody day with a fixed grin on my face showing what a "good loser" I was. It must have been great fun for my mum too. She must have been so proud .

lol

the things is ds would be perfectly happy if he got to do hours of sport at school - he loves it! But it's not everyone's cup of tea!

Oi Aloha

i think you will find you agree with me too

just pointing out

Anyone who has watched their child in tears because they can't handle losing (and it does take lots of kids a while) or others get so wound up by the prospect of losing.....

At the Nursery one it was sorta competitive: stickers etc for first, second third. My poor lad did well just to get from A-B, but by the time he got there all the other parents were bored and wandering. Bloody rude! And the competitive attitude of the parents- sheesh! they're 3 and 4!

fast forward to Mionday, main school sports day: DS1 already crowing nastily to ds2 (ds2 is average) about how fast he is. (he did lose last year but only after a mistake by the mum awarding which they decided to ley go so as not to upset the kid who had been told they ahd won).

Bugger that for a alrf- what shall we try next, SN kid baiting?

its not about liking losing who does? only about learning how to with good grace

Something not every kid can do cammelia (albeit that takes me back to the SN- but then as 2 of mine are, thats my automatic standpoint anyhow)

I know plenty of adults who can't as well

AS do I, some of course will have SN at a lowl level- eg undetected AS. others are just- well - poor losers.

I know I bang ion about SN and of course I would really, but the stat I always quote is that 1% of kids now are thought to be on the auttistic spectrum- before youa dd every other SN thats about! Tahts a lot of kids who just cannot cope really, as most are in Mainstream ed anyhow.

In my area they had inter-school sports for the sporty kids. Proper competition, proper medals & presentation ceremony. The useless among us would go along and cheer them on - everyone happy.

We used to have those as well as a pintless sports day, DH apaprently represented Somerset in the cross cuntry a few times as well (and hilariously came second to last in the aprents race at Nursery LOL- i came abot third of 40 so despite beinga nti competitive sports at primary age was well chuffed )

have no issues when optional, gives kids an escape clause.

Disagree totally castrolgtx. Sports days should only be competitive if children are allowed some say over whether/what they compete in. Even if say everyone has to be in at least one race, but keen/sporty children can be in as many as they want.

At our school sporting achievement, effort and success is rewarded all the time. Those in school teams are praised and get certificates, as well as writing reports on matches for newsletters etc. They sometimes get photos in the local paper etc.

Would you be as keen if all children were FORCED to take part in a music or maths or spelling or whatever competition, with parents and other sundry adults invited to watch this? My kids would have loved some of the above, but I wouldn't force anyone else to do them. Instead, we have concerts and other events for musical children to take part in - as well as those who frankly aren't that musical but love to have a go, and that's great. The key thing is choice.

Our sports days are non-competitive in the sense that they are team games with different activities and children moving around the field, but the competitive element is that points are awarded and the 4 school house teams compete for a cup. And believe me, they do think that matters!

I've had this debate numerous times in recent years, so out of interest I've asked my mum and others of her generation and even earlier generations, and they were almost unanimous in all hating sports days, both when they were at school and as parents. So I don't think the old-style ones were all they are now cracked up to be.

well when i was in school, about 4 years ago there were academic competitions. Mental arithemetic was done in front of everyone and if you didnt answer tough shit. Reading aloud was common practice in school and it was obvious who could read better even in junior school. Agree this is harder with other subjects, but to most kids its obvious who is the fastest etc etc before spports day. Bring back competition, give people ambition and children have to learn they cant be the best at everything.

This comes from a sports day hater, was alwyas last and didnt care!

And the ones who can't be the best at anything penelope?

They're going to end up feeling even more useless aren't they?

PP - you were at school 4 years ago?

I agree this is hierachy in many aspects of life but learning doesn't have to be competitive and certainly not from very young age

sorry, - there is a hierachy

Primary wasn't too bad for me, I had the intelligence there - by the time I got to senior though I was at grammar school.

Terrified of speaking in public, so all the standing up in class stuff made me physically sick, didn't shine intelligence-wise as we were all bright (and they don't bother to mention to you when you are there that you are already above many iyswim), and was no good at sports.

Yup, done the not being best at anything thing. It sucks and it is still with me now - has wiped out anything I felt at primary school.

(I liked sports day from the competing side of things, not the losing.)

It should be a chioce i agree there, if kids dont want to take part thats fine.

Most kids can do somethinfg really well and all have a special taalent whether academic, arty, sporty and most kids do achieve above avcerage at soemthing.

This isnt meant to be an anti children with SN rat becasue thats not how i feel but i think with so much competition in the classroom anyway, sportsday isntgoing to affect children that much.

I have no magic solution theres no right or wrong way around sportsday, aschools are dammed if they do and dammed if they dont.

Yes, most children know who can read best, who is brilliant at art, and who comes top in science every time. But it is not considered appropriate to force children to perform in public in these areas, so why should sport be any different?

Children should be encouraged to enjoy activities which will help them be fit, and to find activities or sports that they can perhaps continue with after school. Team games and competitive sports really have a lot to answer for in this regard, many children are put off 'sport' for life - how many adults really play football or hockey or netball? Far better to show them that there is a multitude of activities out there, that it doesn't necessarily have to be competitive, although of course it can be for those that enjoy this aspect, and that being active doesn't have to be boring or humiliating.

yes, I am only 19.

I quite like the balance achieved at my children's secondary school. Every child is supposed to take part in at least one event on sports day, but other than that it is totally free choice. So those that are either very good at sports or just like having a go (and there are some of those!) do loads of events.

Tutor groups make banners beforehand, and those who aren't competing in a particular event wave the banners and cheer on their class - and this is inter-tutor aspect is very competitive.

I think sport encourages a lot of bullying and sheer nastiness. As demonstrated here.

You're overreacting aloha. There is no nastiness just diff views

And I am glad most enlightened schools are moving away from ritual public humiliation of those with difficulties. Maybe those who are so keen on it can find another way to upset those less able. I don't know, bear baiting? Laughing at disabled kids?