Is this namby pamby of me?

[yesmynameisigglepiggle]

DS is not yet 5, a very sporty child and doing well at school. He is the oldest of 4 so competitive at home, but the youngest in his class. He has taken to 'forgetting' his PE kit, then begging me to take it home. After quizzing him he admitted that he gets upset when getting changed for PE. His teacher gives the first 3 children to be changed a gold star. Little DS just can't cope with the rush to get changed and not being quick enough. The girls win, they have a dress, he has shorts, t-shirt, jumper and socks etc. He is in a mixed class or YR and Y1.

Of course i have told DS in no uncertai terms that he must take his PE kit, though it tugs at my heartstrings. I have also told him many a time that getting dressed is not a race and you can't win every time.

Do I complain or would the teacher think I was an idiot namby pamby parent? (I normally am!!)

[wheresthehamster]

Well, are you going to go in every time ds can't win at something?

The argument about the girls is the other way round ime! Only about 3 or 4 girls in our yr1 class can get their dresses off without help. There are buttons and zips and belts to negotiate. It's the boys who are ready first every time!

[coppertop]

I can see this one from both sides. My ds1's class teacher had a similar system where the first 10 children to get changed would get a sticker. At the time ds1 had a lot of difficulty using his hands and for a while resigned himself to never getting the sticker. As the year progressed he was able to get dressed much more quickly and was absolutely thrilled to get a sticker.

With hindsight I can see that although it was heartbreaking when ds1 felt that he would never win, this was outweighed about a hundred times over by the pride he felt when he eventually won. I would say to let it go and maybe do some extra practice at home with him at speed dressing if you really think it would help him.

[ShinyHappyPeopleHoldingHands]

I haven't heard the term "nambypamby" for years!

Yes go in by all means but not to complain; just to explain that you identified that DS has issues with PE/his PE kit and you've realised why but that you've explained to him winning this "contest" is not important as long as he gets dressed as quickly as he can and doesn't mess about. This way you are highlighting the "problem" to her without saying you have an issue with it.

[mumblechum]

I think we should have a new section called "Am I being Namby Pamby?"

[yesmynameisigglepiggle]

I am not bothered about the competition as such, gosh it is healthy and a good lesson. The issues are

-should 4 year olds be 'forced' to dress as quickly as 6 year olds?

-should I nip this in the bud before is gets more distressing? DS is really sporty and his teacher has already put him off PE when he has been at school 5 months.

FWIW, he is a much speedier dresser then DD, even with her dress and sandals!

[ValnBen]

Hmm, I do think that kids have to learn that they can?t always win ? ?as long as you tried your best? is a well worn out mantra in our house
But, I do think that the difference between Reception aged 4-rising 5 and yr1 aged 5 rising 6 is a very unfair competition ? without brining gender and their difference in clothing in to the equation.
Maybe a gentle word with DS ? explaining that you understand the unfairness, but that the competition (and reward) is not the ?be all and end all? it?s cracked up to be?.?as long as you try ???? ad infinitum?.blah, blah, may be all that?s needed to give him the courage to try.
Failing that, get him to practice in the safety of his own home ?timer set, lots of praise for a good effort (even if it's not that good) etc? bring out that competitive boy that?s hiding in there (cos, he wouldn?t be that bothered it he didn?t have even the smallest competitive streak in him)

[yesmynameisigglepiggle]

Thanks shiny, I crossed posted. I think i will mention it in passing, in a sort of 'isn't it daft' sort of way!

I think having a 'Am i Being namby pamby' section is an excellent idea. I would never get anything done though...

[MrsWeasley]

on PE days can he wear his pe shorts & Tshirt under his school stuff and therefore only needs to take his things off to be ready ?

[ValnBen]

LOL ? very good MrsWeasley ? like that one ? but I fear on these very warn sunny day?s we are having just lately that may not be the answer?..?specially if PE is in the afternoon ? having said that, he might get too warm and knackered to be bothered!!!

Sorry YMNIIP, not trying to be flippant..that was just funny...

[ValnBen]

Bad mummy alert!!!

Says she who recently (on Friday just gone), sent her DS off to school on his first ?field trip? to the beach (we live at the seaside ),complete with his requisite fully disposable lunch pack, his waterproof (in case it rained), hat (in case of sunny weather), fully lathered up with long lasting high factor sun cream (in case of sunny again) only to discover that we had the hottest day of the year so far?.so hat and sun cream was good ? but on getting ready for bed DS could not find his jama top?.searched every where?..eventually found it ?????????? ?????????? ?????????? ????












Under the top he?d been wearing all day!!! How warm must he have been on that beach????

[coppertop]

ROFL at the missing top!

[ValnBen]

LOL copper ? wasn?t funny at the time!! All I could think of was how sweltered he must have been ? (he runs warm under normal circumstances) - and why, oh why didn?t I notice this when I applied the sun cream!!!!