How far behind is my 4 year old?

[elliejjtiny]

He's in reception, aged 4y 8m. Teachers and senco use positive vague phrases when I ask how far behind he is. "Doing really well", " making progress" etc which is good or "30-50 months secure" which is a huge rannge, but I just want to know how far behind the expected level he is and if he will cope with year 1 when there is less playing and more reading/writing. He can't read at all. He can write a couple of very wobbly letters if someone writes the letters first so he can copy. He knows about 5 basic colours and 4 shapes. He can count to 5 and he recognises most of those numbers written down. He is still in nappies but can dress himself in T-shirt and jogging trousers, he can't do socks, shoes, zips, buttons or tuck a shirt in trousers. He can use a knife and fork a bit haphazardly but can't cut up his food. He can't put on or take off his coat. He can wash and dry his hands. Can anyone tell me how far behind he is? And if he will cope with the lessons in year 1? He gets 1-1 help at lunchtime and playtime at the moment and all reading and writing is done either 1-1 or very small groups anyway at the moment.

Thankyou for all of the replies, I'll try and answer all the questions.

He has global development delay plus some health issues and was in special needs preschool. He had portage for 2 terms when he was 3 so he has an ed psych from that but she is not very involved and has only met him twice. His development has been assessed by the health visitor as being about half his real age so he had the skills and development of a 12 month old when he was 24 months etc. his last assessment was age 3.5 I think. Then he started school and the way they did things seemed to be much more vague.

The 1-1 at playtime is because he had a few quite major bumps on his head in the first few weeks in the playground. He isn't very steady on his feet and he walks like he is drunk. One time he stopped breathing from the shock of falling over (like breath holding temper tantrums that some toddlers have but he can't control his and they happen when he is upset or hurt) and I think that scared the teacher so he's had 1-1 at playtime since then.

With the colours he will recognize red but if I show him pink or orange he will say they are red too. He can't blend sounds or recognize letters. If I or the teacher write letters out for him he can copy about 4 different ones but he takes a long time and he has to be shown how to hold the pencil every time. He doesn't have a preferred hand for writing with yet. He loves stories and we read to him lots, both the books he brings home from school and ones from home.

I've thought about him repeating year R but I have concerns that firstly he has a brother a year younger than him (and developmentally ahead) and I would worry that them being in the same year group wouldn't be good for either of them. It's a 1 form entry school too so they would be in the same class all through primary. Secondly he is quite tall, one of the tallest in his class and I think he would look obviously older than the other children if he repeated reception. He is June born so he would be 3 months older than the next eldest child and 15 months younger than some of the youngest ones.

you sound like you are very much on top of this .
it sounds like in class/school support is available and with the close age gap to his brother indeed probably best to continue with his current cohort.

I agree about keeping him with his chronological cohort. However, it really does sound to me like he needs to be assessed for an EHCP. I'm surprised the school didn't do this before he started, as he was already having EP and SEN nursery support.

Please make an appointment with the SENCO to discuss this. If they say he doesn't need an EHCP, please consider making a parent application.

Get the process for ehcp started.
Go visit special.school.so.you know what other options there are
You can absolutely go to open days or ask to be shown around at any time even before getting an ehcp.
Ask for some standardised tearing to identify weak and strong areas.

As longer term pursue genetic testing as having a diagnosis can help eg micro array

It sounds like he is doing well thought he is beginning reading etc

Also see what local.offer is for children with disabilities and get as assessment under children with disabilities to find out about local clubs or opportunities for kids with SEN eg in my area there are swim lessons sports clubs etc

Standardised testing

Ss assessment children with disabilities team and plug into local parent support groups

Loving stories is really good and it sounds like he is willing to try with writing which is fantastic. If you can get him drawing even if just squiggly patterns that will help with pencil control. Things like threading beads onto a stick, or racing to move small objects like marbles from one pot to another will help with the pinchy action and might make holding a pencil feel a bit more natural too.

With a brother in the year below I can see why you would be worried about repeating the year, I can't imagine it being a great idea for either of them. If the school haven't already sorted one you really need an ehcp, and it does sound like he will need a lot of support to cope in year 1, so the school need to crack on with securing the funding for that as it takes a while.

All the best with it all - hopefully they can give you some specific things to do.

Could you try switching him to another school so he won't be in the same class as his brother? There might come a time when he will notice that other children are ahead of him academically. At least if he repeats Reception he'll be more similar to the others in his class.

OP, its always dangerous to compare your child to others.
I have just been to stay with a friend. I have DD1 in reception, she has DS1 in reception (different schools).
DD1 can count to 20, add 2 + 2, write her own name, reading at ORT book band 3, dress herself (but not buttons, zips or laces).
Her DS1 has completed all the phonics, write and spell correctly entire sentences, do maths like 5 + 7 = 12 and can read pretty well.
Apparently there is a child in their reception reading Harry Potter...
Comparisons are odious.
If you have concerns make an appointment with the teacher and ask them directly. Good luck.

sally - the OP has said her DS has global delay and went to a SEN Nursery. This indicates he is not achieving the lowest levels of expectation. He is way below your DD if you read the thread. I can assure you that not every child can catch up or there would not be a need for special schools at all.

When I worked in this field, (quite a long time ago now) we always had an ed psych report when the child moved from nursery to mainstream school if they had additional needs. I chaired a meeting each term where we looked at every nursery Sen child in our area and pre nursery Sen children (we could admit early into nurseries) to see what setting was best for YR and what assistance would be needed. This included reviewing reports from ed psychs, nursery teachers, social services and health visitors.

I am very surprised there has been no planned movement from a Sen nursery to mainstream. If he was at a Sen nursery was there no evidence for a EHCP at that stsge?

There are instances when the mainstream school just isn’t the right setting but negotiations on this stage of schooling would usually be a via an amendment to the existing EHCP to take needs into account.

I feel surprised your DS doesn’t have a EHCP if he went to a Sen nursery and I am surprised the mainstream school isn’t pushing for one.

I think there is a lot more the SendCo at the school can do. I would certainly ask for the schools ed psych to visit. I assume this one isn’t your nursery one.