Relocating from New York To Berkshire with family.

[Rukhsana1]

Hello. My family will be relocating from the U.S. We will be enrolling our boys in wonderful pre-prep school. My concern is making new friends.
Will parents at a primarily boarding school in berkshire be open to new friendships? are there any subtle rules of social interaction I should take into account?

I want this move to be a smooth one for my boys, but also for us as a family. If anyone has advice on how to make new friends in a new country and city, let me know!

Very interested in this one as we're about to start looking to buy in Berkshire and I'll be registering two boys for preps there.
I'm assuming that most schools nowadays have a good mix of parents, most of whom would hopefully be welcoming! Boarding is different these days. Not many full board right off the bat.

PS I'll be your friend

Berkshire is a broad church - rules in Slough may be different in Bucklebury! Boarding parents will tend to have absolutely minimal contact with each other, largely on the basis that most of them will live some distance from the school so you inevitably have a smaller pool to make friends from. Even if they're flexi / part boarding, the reason is often going to be that both parents are working and therefore not as available.

Pre prep is unlikely to be boarding surely? Highly unusual if it is. Therefore they will make friends. Prep is different but they will already have friends by then. It all changes when they get to senior school anyway and lots of boys will board for Y7 & Y8 so they get used to boarding and they may well be local.

Depends on the school/year. From our experience at St Andrews nr. Pangbourne, its great. There is usually a whole year social at the end of each term at a local restaurant, school events, and the never ending rounds of birthday parties which means you'll see the other parents every other weekend anyway.. From that friendships build, via alcohol mainly. There's a few American kids, one does a fab Hallowe'en thing as its more their thing, or something for Thanksgiving.

in terms of the English thing and etiquette, you kind of get a pass, you don't fit in the class structure, and the parents tend to be either pretty successful in their own right, or with money from somewhere down the line and in either case they've travelled and are open.

just don't talk religion, or politics, or money and you'll be fine.

and a note on boarding, starts at year 3 (prep), flexible boarding, my yr2 cant wait.

Thank you all for the wonderful feedback!

Another question re etiquette. Independent schools in New York and Los Angeles ask for hefty donations above and beyond the school tuition. Some schools expect a certain percentage or publish the names of families with how much they donated. I have always found this tacky and wondered how find raising was done in U.K. independent school. My boys are age 6 and 8. They will be day students— however most board where we are sending them. The school is in ascot close to Windsor.

Thank you for your insights.

So far as I know, schools do not expect donations. Don’t get me wrong, they will cheerfully accept them and I am guessing in some ultra high end places in London it may bump you up the admissions list but otherwise no need to donate.

Papplewick by any chance ? Most don't board til year 6 so way to go yet. Mine are all state kids but I know parents there and they are the friendliest bunch - my 'poor' kids have several friends who used to go there and have been to parties there. Snakes seemed to play a huge part !!

again, cant speak for all schools but a percentage? Or publishing donations? First time I've even heard of it.. Sounds awful. I suppose if someone is especially generous, they'd be thanked.

fundraising - well at ours, there's a committee and they run events but its mainly for the benefit of outside charities, we just had a new sports hall, and actually have no idea how they paid for it, they did ask for some contributions for equipment I recall, but it was a small note in a newsletter. Give up some time to run a stall at the fete and you'll be golden.

On the boarding matter, that early I would be really suprised if any of the kids board. If the parents are too busy, then they will have a Nanny for pick up and drop off but even then I'd expect the parents will make an effort at the weekend, and if they don't you probably won't want to be friends with them.