Bullying and making school complaint

[Elw80]

I need help in how to take this further... I’m laying here wide awake, listening to the wind and dreading sending my son (age 9) back to school tomorrow.

Short story... he’s been bullied by a boy in his class for over a year, physically & verbally. Boy has hit my son, called him a fu*ing prk, a fuing fat slg, stolen his bag, strangled him etc etc... He’s not from a very nice family.. think Jeremy Kyle! The mother of said child has physically & verbally assaulted me in the school playground because I’ve made complaints about her child! Police are involved. I’ve had perhaps 8 meetings with school and each time they’ve failed to do anything bar telling bully to respect my son which he has done until th next day and then called him F this or F the that! After last assault by parent on myself my husband and I had a meeting with head where I broke down and I was assured that they would do something proactive about it and also keep my son safe from this mother (whom threaten to get us both my Son and I again at the school) however I have not heard a single thing back from the head which was over a month ago and when I tried to speak to someone in the Senior leadership team as they call it, I have repeatedly been Fobbed off with not available! I am fed up of the school and their quite frankly don’t give a toss attitude! I’ve called my local authority and have tried to find my son a place at another school but there is literally not a single place available at any school in the area!! I’m at a loss as to what to do and it’s starting to make m

This is totally unacceptable. Have you formally complained to the Governors?
Also, if you haven't kept a log of meetings and phone calls try to remember as many details as you can.

If you don't think your ds is safe from this bullying, maybe keep him off tomorrow and ring school first thing and arrange a meeting to discuss how this situation is to be managed.

No 9 year old should have to go through that for a year.

Is home ed an option, maybe as a temporary measure while you wait for an alternative school place?

You can apply for a place at another school then appeal when refused. Not guaranteed to win but worth a try perhaps. May take a while though.

That was going to be my next step in complaining to the govenors... not sure how to write it, or just be open about how it’s been going on, affecting us etc?

I have had so many meetings with school about how to keep him safe, they said easiest option for them was to keep my son in at break etc.. which I said was not fair as why should he be penalised! The last 3 days before end of term I picked him up 15 mins before the end of the day for fear of being attacked again by the mother!

It is affecting my son at home... everyday after school he would say that I obviously didn’t love him other wise why would I send him to that school! He has also wet the bed a few times after the last incident with the mother.

He has a tutor once a week as he is a bright boy and find classwork too easy and not challenging enough! I am trying to work out the logistics of Home schooling but I have just started up my own business and work from home, so would need to find a way to juggle the two!

If you're interested in finding out more about home ed look up home schooling UK on Facebook.

When home edding, you are required to provide a full time education suited to your child's age and ability. You do not need to do this during normal school hours, so there would be options for you to juggle your business around your ds's education.

There are so many resources now online, many free and loads of advice via Facebook groups.

In your case, as the school are not keeping him safe and he is so unhappy, it may be worth considering the viability of home ed.

It’s bad enough the son is a bully but for the mother to be physically and verbally attacking you is just unbelievable. Shows there is zero hope for them changing his behaviour.

I am a Governor at a school and I would strongly recommend writing to the head of Governors. We act independently from the staff and have dealt with many a complaint when the head teacher has not dealt with a problem. We have more influence than I realised when I volunteered. I really hope your son is ok. If they can't guarantee his safety from harassment/bullying explain that you will be withdrawing him.

I'd keep him at home and would report the family from social services.

Write to the governors now. Why wait? This is unacceptable.

Put it in writing to the head teacher, setting out the incidents and explain you want the details of the chair of governors. Then send it to the chair once you get those details. putting it in writing should jolt them into proper action.

And put your ds on the list for a transfer to a number of schools and something will come up. My dcs has no places when we moved House but something came up eventually.

The governors at schools I have worked with had zero to do with this sort of thing. They would refer it back to the Headteacher to deal with.