Would you pay for private school if you could 'just about' afford it?

[user7654321]

And the local state schools weren’t too great.

We could probably just about afford for DS based on the fact that we can easily afford £1500 a month nursery fees at the moment and we still have some spare cash each month (£1000), but obviously it would be nice to have that spare cash to save/spend on other things.

We are just thinking is it worth considering, and looking into private options, if we aren’t mega rich. Would you make sacrifices elsewhere to afford private education?

We've had this discussion and decided no to primary - assuming 5% fee increase per year plus adding in all the actual costs (uniform, meals, clubs ...) - would prefer to top up state, go on holiday, save for a rainy day, not worry about redundancy, not worry if one of us gets ill etc

Our state options are ok to good though not dire

We looked at the local independents then took a deep breath and went for it. We did have a savings buffer - just as well as I stopped paid work when my youngest was small never dreaming that a decade on I'd still not be earning much. Scholarships and bursaries have helped but we are working our way through that buffer. In our case I think it has been worth it.

I'd suggest looking properly at your local schools and thinking about what they offer, how they feel, whether that extra feels worth paying for for you as a family. That private primary-> state secondary is an "established path" helps because there will be less of an expectation that you stay in the independent system. Save as much as you can whenever you can to give yourselves choices.

Definitely think carefully about whether you will have more children and factor that into your decision making. Also consider whether grandparents might have an interest in helping fund education - some are keen to if they are able, some wouldn't be able to or wouldn't want to, but you might not know unless you have a conversation about school choices, at some point.

I did, for 7 years. Really struggled at times, went through 3 ebay cars in that time all cost no more than £200. Highly stressful however the state secondary schools around me are shocking, huge classes, poor results, drugs, no motivation or encouragement to do well or have ambition.

Only came across two snobby parents who looked down on me, however the other parents were great and I’m still friends with some now.

My thoughts are education opens opportunities and you only have one shot. Just my thoughts though.

If you really feel your local state is truly terrible and the private is much better, then it’s possible. It’s going to be very tight though with the year on year fee increases, extra curriculars, uniform etc. Lots of parents make the sacrifice though and compromise elsewhere, you wouldn’t be alone. We are very lucky to not have to make any financial sacrifices for fees now, but we did so when our eldest started primary and I would be very stressed out if the financial situation was that precarious throughout their school career. It would have been a constant worry.

If your child is bright then I probably would not. My children have all been in a variety of state and private schools. The private schools have smaller class sizes, obviously. My opinion is that the kind of child who will benefit most from a private school is a child who is average and also does not have any SEN v

No i wouldn't.

One of my children had bursaries and scholarships but I found it difficult finding the money for uniform, school trips and other expenses. Like they would just casually announce that there was going to be a £50 trip A LOT. She is now at a state academy and is doing fine there but she is a straight A student.

Yes. Absolutely. No question. As my parents did for me.

We could have gone private but didn't.

We used the money to move to a better location for the kind of schools we like. We also pay for lots of extracurricular activities. DH and I are actively involved in the school.

The local state schools are excellent.

Our children mix with a wider range of people than our friends at independent schools, which I see as a huge bonus. Mind you, our independent sector friends think that only having naice children in class is a benefit not a disadvantage. They are happy with their choices and I am happy with mine.

'Naice children'? That's a bit rude!

I wouldn’t send mine private if you paid me. Just do what you think is best for your dc in your own local circumstances.

I am of the opinion that the quality of a child's formative education is paramount. The foundations for learning are laid in the early years, so the best quality available to you is the one to go for.
Private/state doesn't come into it, if it's right for the child is the key.

While the first few years may seem manageable, especially if Early Years funding applies, there are usually significant jumps at year 3 and year 5, both in fees and extras, as well as above inflation increases annually. I know a family who have moved their dc for this reason but it was a wait until a state place came up, they had to move mid term and for 18 months had 2 at different schools.

Do remember both fees inflation (higher than every other inflation index in recent years and I dinmt see that changing soon).

And the other big expense if childcare (if you need it) over the longer holidays. Are there holiday clubs which cover the weeks when state schools are still on termtime? in areas like SW London where there are a lot of private preps, the answer is yes, but that's not the case where there are fewer. If not many in your area, how will you cover those weeks and how much would that cost?

‘Mind you, our independent sector friends think that only having naice children in class is a benefit not a disadvantage. ‘

One of the private schools I used did not only have ‘naice’ children imo. It had a collection of thieving little brats who kept helping themselves to charity money and my dd’s school uniform. The school did nothing about it. This is ONE school. But I’m just making the point that private school doesn’t necessarily equal better behaved children.

I chose private for primary and secondary, even though we could only just afford it. It was OK until marriage broke up and we had to face to separate mortgages and still school fees. We both ended up seriously downsizing so that we could keep DS at school. It's hard and in retrospect I would not do it again. Counting the days until it's over. So my recommendation would be to make sure you have a good buffer. You never know what's round the corner

*two separate mortgages

I'd start in state and see how it goes. Potentially save up for private secondary.

Thanks for all the advice. I think we need to have a proper look at the local state primary school and take it from there.

If we decided it was really dire, we would currently have a budget of £2,500 - £3,000 per month for education/childcare without making other sacrifices. If we do have another DC then there are sacrifices we could make to pay for both (e.g. cheaper hols, curb spending) but there wouldn't be much buffer. I also agree with those that say that the extra cash could pay for a hell of a lot of extra tuition, or could be saved for future.

I do. My son is much much happier and his academic skills are now marked as above average. His old school he was lonely, showing signs of anxiety and barely worked. Best thing I ever did

Absolutely! What could possibly be a better thing to spend your spare income on? If the state schools were good you could potentially use the money to top up their education so that is of a similar quality to your local preps but even then private schools usually represent really good quality for money. In addition to providing a high quality of education they also have a very strong focus on soft skills, everything from general polish and table manners to elocution lesson and chess clubs, that state schools just don't have the funding to cover. There is much more to a good education than academic attainment.

I wouldn't for primary.
Considering it now DS in year 7 and our joint income is £50k ish.

Outstanding does not always equal a great school either. Ofsted may rate it so, but it does not give the true feel of a school. I'd rather have a school that wasn't outstanding but that was caring and a great ethos with strong results/progress 8.

Obviously it is possible to have an outstanding school with all those qualities too - just don't be blinded by the outstanding label.

Yes totally. My children's education is the most important thing to me. They are both in small classes of around 15. They have one to one time every day. They have access to amazing facilities and get to try stuff they otherwise wouldn't have the time to. We moved to the country to make it possible - schools are cheaper here. As is property. I'm glad we did it. You only get one shot at this and I believe that their prep education is possibly the most important bit. Giving them confidence and security for the rest of their lives...

There’s a good point made there. Just because it’s private does not mean it’s got a good pastoral policy. My sons new school does and really looks after the kid as a whole not just their academic education. So research as much as you can!