Private schools??

[nikki81]

Hi everyone. Our DD is due to start the local primary school in september but we are now very reluctant to send her there and would like her to go to private school. Our nearest one is 30 mins drive for me so I have make sure this is the right decision. I do not even know if she would get a place there now as it's probably too late. I am also worried about what the parents will be like there. Does anyone have any advice. I am going to phone them on tuesday but they probably wont be there as it's half term. Thanks.

driving that sort of distance each day is so risky (I have heard as dangerous as working down a coal mine), does the benefit of private school (if any) outweigh that risk of injury in a road accident

I drive 30 minutes ish to private school with my children, it's not a problem for us. We're very happy with the school on the whole and find most parents perfectly normal and friendly - possibly more so than the ones at our previous (state) school in London!

I'm driving that distance and I find it increasingly tiring. There was a point a few weeks ago when I thought enough is enough and... just as I was planning when to let the school now, they got the best OFSTED review I have seen. So, well not sure what to do know, I'm tired but, educationally speaking, it's a fantastic place to study.

I'm thinking of gettin a mobile home around the school area just to avoid the driving!

Talking about that... There are people driving 35+ miles each way to take their cildren to DS's school.

35 miles sounds a ridiculous distance - does that mean a round trip of 70 miles twice a day (700 miles a week) I wouldn't put children or myself through that type of risk or stress. Would just get home in the morning in time to get back again.

Ours travel three miles or so each way to school but there is a good coach/bus service each way and they do go past other schools to get there - hate it when I do have to drive them which is very rare too many others at school gate

Yes Hooray, there should be a family or 2 doing that and at least another 10 driving a bit nearer. But the school is well worth it. And in our case, it has the aditional benefit of being the safest option (DS has severe food allergies so at 5:1 staff-pupil ratio and plenty of people trained in how to cope with anaphylactic reactions, it's worth even driving further away!)

I lived in a country and attended university in another, I lived about 10 miles from the border crossing point, there was (at the time)a waiting of a 1.5-2.5 hours to cross one way and at least half an hour coming back, the university was 8 miles from the crossing. I did it every day as hundreds of other students and... it's just a matter of getting used to it and do something interesting with the time. There were plenty of people from both cities doing this to take children to school on either side of the border.

Now, I find it tiring sometimes, but I have noticed that perhaps because there's not much to do, perhaps because DS is restrained by a seat belt or whatever but... he talks and talks and talks, that time has become such a fun, interesting and even educational time, that the day of the week I have to do even a further driving... it's my favourite day of the week

OP have you rung the school yet? What did they say to you? Best of luck!

We did a school run of 500 miles a week for 5 years. It cost a fortune in fuel/ car bills and was very tiring but it is do-able. DH works nights and found it easier to sleep in the car in a layby near the last school (3 kids at 3 different schools) than come all the way home again in between. That was OK except when well-meaning passers by woke him up checking he wasn't dead, and the day the police accused him of being the local burglar (because of course once you'd completed your burglaries you'd settle down to sleep in your car with the loot...!)

I personally HATE the growing trend of driving small children miles and miles to a 'nice' school. Are you absolutely sure there's nothing suitable close to home??

I think most people hate it tbh londonmamma, but often the reason they do it is there is no acceptable alternative for their situation, closer to home.
Allergies and medical conditions can be a major factor as chandra says. We have two children in ds' class whose parents went private, with an annoying rush-hour drive, mainly because they felt the school's policy on medicine administration, number of registered first aiders (in excess of legal requirement) and stated procedures for severe asthma/anaphylactic shock were an assurance they had to have.
We are very lucky to be able to walk to school and certainly prefer this solution.

Just out of curiosity, why are you only deciding about schools now? Have you just moved to the area?

Maybe something has happened at the school nikki was planning to send her child to?
We had one lined up and the year before we'd have applied they announced its amalgamation with a failing school a further 3/4 mile up the road. Big rethink suddenly required.

Sure but don't people apply November 06 for Septembe 07 intake? That's why I wondered if it was due to being new to the area and having to research schools really quickl.

Yes, usually
Have numerous friends on tenterhooks right now. Fortunately dd is sorted.

just as well we don't all drive kids 500miles a week to school, all that carbon dioxide and global warming there won't be a future to educate them for

horrayitseasterhols, there was a vile piece in the Standard a couple of weeks back, about how families weren't bothering to move to "better" areas to get their kids into the right schools, because they could just bus them in. the article said it saved the family the expense and hassle of having to move. oh yeah, just the hassle of sitting on a bus for 3 hours a day for some poor child

Fantastic though Hooray, at the moment I'm concentrating in keeping him breathing by avoiding peanuts but have also got a very ecological car (both in terms of petrol and CO2 emissions) in order to help me cope with my ecological quilt

Bundle, I'm not sure how things were mentioned in the article but I can vouch that in my city, with regards to good secondary schools) everybody would like to move to their catchment area, so much that the houses are exactly the same but the price is about 30-40% higher. So, most people won't be able to afford it.

chandra, that was the gist of the article, but I got the impression that many of the people pictured maybe could afford it at a stretch, but quite blithely shoved their kids on a bus (including homework club after hours) so they didn't have to bother

One of my friends put her house in the market to move to the catchment area, and while she was at it, they went to see a house that was exactly the same as hers (same model, same building company) in the other area, the diffeence in price was well above £100,000 so... not exactly lazyness. At some point she was considering that with the money spent in getting the same house in the expensive area, she could send one of her children to the most expensive private school in the other

I'm not saying it's lazy, but the quotes from these families truly shocked me: "it's great, we don't have to bother with homework as they've done it all at afterschool club" etc. why bother having kids at all?

we're in the process of trying to find somewhere to buy locally (from a flat to a house) and the prices are astronomical, it's going to be tough for us to stay in the same area but I'm determined because dd1 is happy at school

I did see that article, bundle, it was exceptionally bokesome, even for the Evening Standard. The gist was a bunch of clearly very rich parents living in Chiswick so that Daddy didn't have to commute to the City and handy for those business trips out of Heathrow, while sending little Hugo and Jeremy as day boys courtesy of the school's bus service to country boarding schools in Berkshire or Oxfordshire. WTF?

It just seemed the worst of all possible worlds for the children (though not for the parents, clearly). And the schools, who can presumably identify a bunch of suckers from 50 miles away, must be pretty happy about it too.

thanks, frogs, far more eloquently remembered than me. I hadn't wanted to say the C-word but yes it was Chiswick and you're right about the losers being the children - it felt a little like their weekly veg box being delivered

bokesome - good word

"I'm determined because dd1 is happy at school "

I think that's the important thing, keeping the children happy, obviously there are many different ways to achieve this. It's about finding the right balance. And sometimes finding that balance may involve travelling for miles, relocations, etc. but well, after all we all are doing the best we can. In ideal conditions every one of us would have a wonderful school that will cater for our children's particular needs just across the street. Unfortunately we don't live in an ideal world and we have to make do with the options that are presented to us.

Ps. By the way, I never said you said it was lazyness