Reception age child won't eat his free meal

[feral]

My 4yo ds started reception and has been coming home starving but telling me he likes his lunch.

Teacher now telling me he's refusing to try anything he doesn't like the look of and hardly eating anything. Therefore they want me to give him a packed lunch.

I plan to talk to him and I'm giving him the rest of this week -

• does anyone have any.l suggestions on how to get an already fussy vegetarian child to try what's on offer when I'm not even present to encourage?

And please don't say 'let him eat meat' because he knows he can try it if he wants to but even if he wasn't saying he didn't want to eat meat he wouldn't try it as it's new.

I'm at a loss!

DS2 used to eat everything, with gusto, when at nursery.

At infant school, he started to become a really bad eater. Turned out the meals were really horrible - there wasn't a kitchen in the school so they were delivered at 9am in the morning and left in a hot box to keep warm until they were served up at 12.30. Even the salad and bread were left on top of the hot box, so while not actually hot, they were warmed...

It was pure fluke that I happened to be at school one day when lunch was being served and saw it. Although it said it was pizza and salad, it really was an embarrassment. And that was one of the better meals they served.

After that I didn't push ds to eat school lunches although would still order some occasionally. He's now at a different school, food is much better, but it's still a struggle to get him to try school lunches as he's been scarred by the infant school ones. Even things at home that he used to like he struggles with because the memories of infant school dishes with the same name scare him so much.

Really wish I'd just ignored the free school meals and sent in a packed lunch and then maybe I wouldn't have ended up with such a fussy eater.

I'd try to get there to see the food to see if it really is bad - in which case, send in packed lunches. Or if it's not too bad, then work out what he would like, what he would hate and send in a packed lunch on the days he would hate stuff.

It's not about affording it, more wishing he wasn't fussy. I also can't deny having to make a packed lunch will be a pita but I'll live.

He already does breakfast club two mornings and no issues eating his shreddies there cos he loves them!

It's still early days yet. They get free meals until the end of y2 so there is plenty of time for your ds to start eating the school dinners. I don't think you should worry too much about the fussy eating.

Honestly feral he might not be being picky or fussy some schools meals are genuinely rank and at 4 you are old enough to know what's nice and what isn't!

As a school dinner lady, this is not unusual. My ds(yr6) only eats fish and chips every Friday. Pizza is not proper pizza dough, more like bread but biggest number choseing school dinners.
Agree with looking through the menu and discuss with him what he liked. Some new parents send in packed lunch as well as ordering dinners, if the kids don't like the dinner they go and get their lunch box.

The free school meals at my son's school are pretty rubbish. His packed lunch is much healthier! If be fussy if the school meals were horrible too....

My vegetarian kids hate school lunches so they make their own packed lunches. Ds told me they gave him meat sausages once and then took them back off the plate to swap for Quorn , leaving 'meat juice'. All the kids with poor table manners put them off as well. I'd do packed lunches and be done with it

Any suggestions for non boring veggie lunchbox stuff that I can practice getting him to eat at home first?

All your replies have really made me think packed lunch has to be the way to go or at least a combo depending what's on the menu that day.

I let my DD eat a packed lunch in Reception. I think it made her feel secure. I told her she had to have school dinners in year 1 and she was fine. I would make a lunch for now if you can afford to.

Ferel My kids have piece of fruit or tub of grapes, cheese and ham or Nutella wrap, (leave out the ham), tube yoghurt, cheese pre wrapped portion and small packet of crisp every day. I give them cordial as they have water in class. Then I put them a different treat in every day e.g. Jelly, buiscit treat thing, ice gems and they love seeing what it is. I pack two up- a good sized dinner with lots of options and I do it for £15 a week shopping at Aldi. I really can't recommend their pack up stuff enough!

I just put in a lot of variety but smaller iyswim.

I'm sending mine in with a few snacks on advice from the teacher. It's been working well.

I have a fussy vegetarian child just started in reception. It helped to look at the menu and explain what things are as at home we might have something similar but call it a different name. Like she hadn't realised the quorn sausages at school are vegetarian because at home we just call them sausages! So I got the packet out of the freezer and showed her the name. We've rehearsed different ways of asking about the menu, eg, 'I'm vegetarian, can i eat that?' 'Does that have meat in?'.

If he was good at reading meals at nursery I'd persevere, he might just be getting used to things and it might not even be about the food, it could be how noisy the dining hall is or how many people are there.

I think you are right to give him a packed lunch. He will probably become less fussy as he gets older. From my own experience my children were more willing to try different foods once they got older. Also I don't think that anyone should rely on the school dinner as their children's main meal and only give a sandwich in the evening, unless your schools are better than those I have seen.

What foods will he eat ? I would give some of these foods varying them on each day and then put 1 thing in that is new.

Loads of veggie kids on here! I'm veggie kids aren't! Can I be nosy and ask is it their choice or did you decide they were?

Veggie options on school lunches can be really weird, so I don't blame him. E.g. Baked bean lasagne

I think your sandwich for tea plan may not work out as they're so hungry after school. School meals are small and not always that balanced. I think children need a proper tea in the evening, especially vegetarians, to ensure sufficient protein and nutrients. (We are also veggie)

I have progressed to super boring packed lunches. Sandwich/wrap, cucumber sticks, grapes. Occasional crisps. They don't have long to eat and i try to keep the sugar content down so they can have pudding in the evening.

My dd is fussy and refused point blank to eat her nursery meals so I haven't bothered with school dinners.

I know her well enough to know that a) she has an incredible sense of taste and smell which is very common in fussy eaters b) she has big tonsils so when she eats certain foods they "stick" and c) she gets acid reflux so gets burning stomach pains if she eats certain food.

My priority is for her to eat at school, so she gets packed lunches of stuff she likes. At homeshe is encouraged to try things and bless her, she does.

She isn't my PFB - he eats like a vacuum cleaner although was fussy at about 3/4 but now will try most things. He is vocal if he doesn't like something but that's ok. We are all entitled to our opinion!

I'm taking on board the evening sandwich is a no go

I'm new to this. All advice appreciated.

Does he want packed lunch? It’s possible his mates have it and so he wants the same. It’s also possible he thinks you’ll give him treats. If he doesn’t eat school meals, I’d personally go with really boring food, no sweets/fruits/yoghurt just veg, and a bottle of water. But then I think having a hot meal at school is important.

Also, unless your child has a large appetite, don't put loads in. I think a lot of children seem to be overwhelmed when they open a lunch box with lots in. They don't seem to get very long at all to eat and obviously there's a bit of chat with their friends. I had to reduce the amount I put in as my daughter used to come home worrying that she hadn't eaten all her lunch. At 8, I have only just started adding a bit more.

Nutty that's so mean!

Maybe gruel and water in his lunchbox

If it gets him to eat school dinner why not gruel lol. Seriously though, the lunch is free presumably because you need the extra bit of financial help. He needs to be encouraged to eat it.

As I mentioned earlier, mine thought packed lunch meant lovely berries and wraps every day. When he realised cheese or ham sandwich on brown loaf and apple is his lot, he swiftly agreed to school meal again.