'Star of the day' system for yr 1 - RANT (apologies)

[ipanemabunny]

My ds is in an ELS group of about 6 or 7 children.
The 'Star of the Day' award is clearly for the child who has been the quietest and has sat the most still and not made a sound etc.
My ds is never going to be a mouse or a statue. He is a normally active and excited boy - I'm so sick of the messages he gets that the meek, quiet, pliable, compliant get festooned with awards!
Of course those children should be rewarded (and I'm sure they're EASIER TO TEACH...) but what about other qualities that enable communication and language like confidence? vocabulary? general verbal skills? expressiveness? passion? imagination? sense of humour? narrative skills? acting skills? musical skills? creativity?????? Shouldn't they get some room for praise too?
This is not the USSR or China - we don't want to just breed drones do we????
Awards should not be set higher than a child can achieve and they should vary in what they reward shouldn't they????
My ds was in tears last night saying "it's too hard, I can't do it, I'm not going to get a shiny pencil - wailing and sobbing"

I can see why you're upset but I think those skills (that Twig has listed) obviously do make them easier to teach but ALSO mean that your child will find it easier to be taught iyswim (and there will be less chance of distracting all the other children).

I'm sure, if he's only got 2 stars to go, he'll get his pencil .

DD's school has "star of the week" but it seems to operate very differently (perhaps because there are only 10 in the class?). Every child gets the award once a term, any extra weeks are conveniently "whole class" awards (e.g. fab performance in Nativity play). The reasons for the award vary hugely from "reading aloud with beautiful expression" to "trying a new food at lunch time", and although the kids are aware that they will each get an award they still seem genuinely delighted when they are picked.

yes of course its harder for a boy to do it in general than a girl .. they tend to be more physical

did you miss the part where I said my DS was the same and the same age

I know exactly what you mean but I had a different response to it from the one you're having (which I must say wasn't easy because my automatic response was 'how very dare you') .. I was only trying to explain my rationale for my response to it and what I'd done about it to help support him

we talked about how important it is to try and also how difficult it can be, about the times when he's allowed to be a chatterbox and fidget and the times when its not appropriate. We also worked out together some techniques to help him remember to be quiet when he was supposed to be which included putting his finger on his lips as a physical reminder and him asking me to write (tattoo) on the back of his hands for a couple of days (the words Listen and Don't Talk)

but I agree, it's so hard to see your children get upset by things like this but good that he obviously cares enough that he's trying very hard (and if his teacher's worth her salt, she'll have noticed).

dd has actually been star of the day about 4 times, its a shame the sitting still thing is not being followed though at home, she wriggles about so much at the dinner table, i've lost count of how many times she's fallen off her chair

Twig is right, right, right.

The other thing that I'm not sure anyone has mentioned is children who are sitting quiety and concentrating are not only easy to teach but LEARN MORE. There is a real emphasis in primary on not too much 'chalk and talk' and interactive activities on the carpet, these times are the key learning times which are then re-inforced by the practising of activities at their table.
I have a dd who I know will be absolutely fine in school because she can sit and listen and concentrate but equally I have a ds who rarely sits still and concentrates! I would expect him to learn though when it is appropriate to be noisy and when not and also to be rewarded if he does. Why should children who can sit still and listen not be rewarded before their behaviour...I'm sure my dd will be one of these children (it's just the way she is, not my doing!) and I would hope that her diligence will be acknowledged and rewarded.
I think in the OP mentioning to the teacher that your ds is trying hard is a good idea and then she can reward him for trying, maybe give him a short chunk of time in which to succeed?

I'm generally happy with ds1's class system, but I know he gets quite disillusioned with the 'star of the day' award - he's got it twice, but it generally goes either to the slightly 'pushier', loud children (the ones who are always 'me me me miss') or the naughtier children if they've done particularly well one day. Which is hard for ds1 as he is a very 'good' boy, but is quite quiet.

All very good points, I agree Twig and foxin. He needs to learn to sit still and listen and learn. But if you'd seen him in floods of tears last night saying "I've tried, it's too hard, I can't do it" I think you'd wonder about setting the bar too high!
I'll ask her tonight about it.
My lovely mil (rtd teacher) just phoned and said everything you said Twiglett. But also she hopes that the teacher will put it right and not leave him the only child without a bloody stupid PENCIL!

interesting - in my DS's school they hand out stickers on a daily basis and little certificates, and have monthly awards which are given out in assembly. DS has noticed that it is the noisier naughtier children who get the daily rewards (because they are trying to encourage the little good behaviour they produce!) and the quieter well-behaved children who tend to get the monthly awards. DS is of course in the former group (he commented once that he got a sticker for being a "normal good boy". I'm not sure if this is a better system but it avoids the problem of either just rewarding one group or the other.

Of course we need our children to learn when to be quiet, when to concentrate, and the value of working hard. But we also need to reward effort, which is where I really feel for Ipanemagirl's little boy.

DS1 is now 8 and he can't sit still; if he concentrated on sitting still, he would have no concentration left for the lesson. If he moves about, he can learn. But that's not acceptable at 8 and he is suffering for it. In his Y4 class, the children who get the most merits are of two types - the really academically able ones who get them for excellent work all the time, and the children with significant learning or behavioural problems, who get them for effort.

The quite-bright-but-finds-it-difficult-to-concentrate-child, or the quiet-no-trouble-but-average-academically-child, don't get many merits at all. It's all very disheartening.

Star of the day is awarded at my childrens' school for any number of things - not sitting quietly! Most kids end up getting at least 1 or 2 a term.

I think sometimes these reward systems are counter-productive. The excelling children take them for granted and too many groups often don't get enough of this kind of encouragement.
I think the main thing is what messages are the children getting in each place?
My ds is getting the message that he's the worst in his els group - he has the least stars therefore he's the worst. I don't see how that's a productive message for any child, he's just frustrated and despondent.
I'll see what she says this afternoon and try to be positive.

I think that ours are given for anything that they've done well. Mine have had them sometimes for things as seemingly minor as helping in the classroom, or doing a peice of work better than the day before. They aren't for any specific thing. That was every child will get one at some time.

And good luck with the teacher. She probably doesn't realise how much it's upsetting him

thanks to all for your patience and support.... Just saw his els teacher. ds got a precious star today and she says they'll all get a pencil before Easter! phew!

my mil and dh are right - I worry too much and over-react I should always speak to the teacher before I get carried away on a wave of my own hysteria. parenthood is so stressful!!!

it was the other way round for my ds
The kids that got on an did the work and did it well without hassle, got sweet FA
the disruptive kids who cut down their swear words from 10 to 4 and kept violence to a less than their average weekly basis got rewarded for sodding improvement.
I cna see the logic in encouraging kids who would normally get told off, but it sent a negative msg to the kids who got on.
Should be fairer ways of doing things that are more inclusive

I agree with Piffle. The way it goes at our school is that that the ones who get 'star pupil' the most tend to be the more disruptive or struggling children. My dd has got it twice in 3 years. She is bright and well behaved. There are others like her - it seems that the teacher thinks they don't need to try so hard to produce good work so they don't get the rewards. When they do it has to be for something exceptional. At 7 years old they don't really understand and my dd has said (when she hadn't had it once after nearly 2 years at school) that ''I'm useless because I never get star pupil''. What is clear is that if they are going to have such a system they must ensure that every child gets their fair share.

its your job to worry too much though

and tbh we all over-react when its our children at stake .. it is far easier to analyse someone else's situation and be rational about it

I think, without mn, I'd probably have been all-guns blazing about my DS and his warnings .. but it gave me a place to talk it out, well here and with some RL friends, that helped me be a little more objective about it

.. am glad he'll get his sparkly pencil .. sparkly pencils are the most important thing at times aren't they?

my bet is Early Literacy Strategy

I'm doing an M.Ed at the moment and currently am studying 'managing behaviour in schools'. This may sound simplistic but it seems to me that many schools have bought into the behaviourist theory - they use reward systems to encourage good behaviour. However, after teaching for 15 years and now having done extensive research on this subject, I strongly believe that too many schools are dabbling in the theory, but don't actually know enough about it to implement thoroughly and effectively. There are many theories of behaviour which should be considered when writing a behaviour policy. Maybe a point you could bring up with your head?

early literacy support.
It's fab! It's an early intervention programme for kids in Y1. It's not for kids who really struggle like most of these things. It's for 'middling' kids who are 'middling' because they're not reaching their potential IYKWIM. Brings them right up IME.

Children who sit quietly and listen learn more. Children who interrupt and talk at the wrong times not only don't learn so well but also they prevent other children from learning. Of course all children are individuals and every one has different qualities that need to be recognised at the right time. BUT school is an environment where tough though it is certain behaviour is needed at certain times and children do have to learn to fit in to that system. I bet your ds gets loads of priase when the time is right for active participation.

The choice for the teacher who has to try and fit 25 little square pegs into 25 little round holes is either enouraging the behaviour you need with rewards, punishing the behaviour you don't need or doing neither. I know which I'd prefer.

I hate these Star of the day badges etc. My DS1 was/is the model pupil (would never shout out, always sat still,worked hard, never talked etc) and would be so upset every Friday because it was never him. I finally plucked up the courage and asked the teacher who got these awards and why. They were for sitting still, working hard, etc so asked what DS was doing )or not doing)to never get one and was told that as he was always good he got overlooked Blardy stupid IMHO.

IMHO I would buy a supply of shiny pencils and reward him yourself.

It is so interesting to hear everyone's different views on this. Smileygirl, I'm on the curriculum committee at ds's school so can easily bring this subject up and ask about how these rewards systems are assessed. What are the alternatives to this kind of approach? Are there theories I could research online that a non-academic could understand?
I think it would be a useful question on the parents/pupils' end of year questionnaire - but I think it would be important to make sure the questions were well put. Questions that would get the truth out of people like: Do you think the rewards system in school is fair? sort of thing.
I think it's interesting to find out if children think they are successful or not at school and what they perceive to be the indicators for that.
A friend's ds in yr 2 has hearing difficulties and is in a special needs group for most subjects but his self esteem is very solid and he thinks he's brilliant at what he does.
The use of time-out is interesting as well. In ds's school children who have been naughty together are often sent to time out together; this seems to just reinforce the relationship and reward the bad behaviour. Strange policy. Maybe like most things - carefully handled these methods can be good but as a blunt tool they just stop working.