My DS YR1 is "slow"?

[Babelange]

Bit of a shock speaking to DS's teacher at parent consultation evening... Seems that DS1 (nearly 6) who is quiet and bidable isn't keeping up with the rest of the class. Specifically she noted that his handwriting isn't up to scratch and his numeracy is behind. His reading is broadly where it should be - we read to him every day - since he was 12 weeks old! He's been put on a Education Learning Scheme (since Jan) where the school identify children (6 in his class) who could benefit from extra group time - I didn't appreciate what this meant until last night as I had the usual impersonal photocopied sheet "your child has been selected..." and it wasn't in an envelope so after I read it, I binned it!
When I had the chance to look at his work books last night I could see how he was struggling. And now I am feeling a bit teary as he had drawn the most beautiful little owls for a project - all my friends remark on the lovely pictures he draws which we proudly display on the fridge... I am feeling so sad that a child who tells me that certain clouds in the sky look like they are in a painting will end up being marooned at the bottom of the class???
He looks forward to going to school - so no problems getting there. When I asked him, he told me that he doesn't like the extra group time I mentioned AND dislikes having to compete with the other children to get their PE kit on "first".
I thought I'd write a letter to the teacher along the lines of ... this is what I understood last night. Should we consider external tuition? Reading the Kumon threads I don't think this is for us. Has anyone engaged an educational psychologist to help them find out the best learning strategies for their child, even when they have no obvious learning or behavioural difficulties?

All your comments are v. helpful & thanks to Throckenholt re: weblink and writing games (he actually made placement labels of his own accord a week or so ago). He got the opportunity to bring the school bear home with its diary about 2 months ago - seemed to be a good way for other parents to show-case their talents! And I had a major freak out when I saw kids who could write whole paragraphs about their weekend. We took some photographs each day and helped him write v.v. short captions - he was keen but struggled. Anyway thought something might be amiss but got a book ("Good Schools Guide"?)from the library and reassured myself about the wide abilities in this age group.
The school is quite academically driven (I live in Herts, most of the even decent secondary schools are partially selective) so yes very possible it's a 'good' year. Took another peak at their Ofted which is good - but problems with class size, noise and some lessons being unspecific. The teacher did say that the ELS is about helping kids who are not fulfilling their potential.
He's an end April baby and in Reception last year he seem to peak in the summer holidays.
I will go back to the teacher for extra clarification AND I have the Yellow Moon catalogue in front of me and there's some fun things (tho' he'll def prefer painting the helicopter on p 56!) that we can have around (and yes will def buy said helicopter. DS2 can have a go at racing car/motorbike - also bright at 3.5, deft with a paint brush, read numbers but no interest in writing his name. Sigh.)
A little bit every day rather than a drastic intervention seems best, yes?

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Harman, what has your DS been like with his motor skills since birth ? Was he rolling over roughly when they are supposed to, when did he crawl, walk etc ? Any issues with trying to get him to eat solids ? How was he with things like jumping, hopping etc ?

Sorry to bombard you with so many questions. A lot of children who do have a few problems with motor skills do find school quite hard going and get much more tired than a lot of other children which lead to a few problems. Probably way off target here so apologies if I am .

your plan sounds good babelange - if he's young for his year, it's really no surprise that he's struggling with some things tbh (and remember, the teacher has said he's fine in reading). Be guided by the teachers and your gut instinct.

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poor boy harman - and yes, it is a truly exhausting having to deal with all the school crap (especially, I imagine, if you're on your own).

when is he 7? yes, dd is v clumsy too and always falling over! We have not had a meal since the beginning of this year where one of them hasn't knocked a drink over - seriously!

That's good Harman, well not the falling over bit the rest. My DD has a magnetic attraction to lamp posts when we are out, exhausting trying to walk down the road !

I guess like most things there's a scale of where children are with their motor skills and huge difference between individual children. I think children who find them a little harder have a few problems with things like using cutlery, concentration, sitting properly at the table, dressing, pencil grip. As Foxinsocks says it does take some of them that bit longer. Whilst they do find it hard it does make things more of an effort and more likely to lead to more emotional behaviour if that makes any sense. I am a big fan of fish oils as I think they do help with things like this.

Babelange, I am sorry I have been no help on your thread whatsoever and I do apologise.

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has he had any health problems harman? glue ear, large tonsils...maybe something is stopping him sleeping at night.

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yes, my emotionally sensitive ds had a day off school yesterday and slept for almost 2 hours in the afternoon. Thought I wouldn't get him to go to bed at night time, but off he went and slept all night too!

Think emotionally sensitive ones find it hard to wind down too - do you find that? e.g. I know when ds is tired but even though he is tired, he can't get off to sleep without pissing about for ages iyswim.

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My dcs are not at this stage yet so can't advise on practical steps.

I just wanted to say that I had problems with handwriting all through school and they were regularly drawing my parent's attention to it and expressing concern. It wasn't just messy - I had real problems forming some of the letters. However, I have a law degree from Oxford, a happy life and type most things so who cares. Just telling you this so that you don't panic too much about the handwriting.

You sound like a lovely mum and your ds sounds lovely - don't be sad!

I think it's worth chasing up the school's referral harman (was it to a psychologist?) but other than that, I'm not sure there's much you can do yourself. I think (although quite possibly painful) it's helpful to hear someone else's take on them - especially when you can see they have emotional difficulties because it is bloody difficult when you are so close to them all the time, to know how to deal with problems like that (the crying etc.) iyswim.

I have often thought of taking ds to see someone because I find it incredibly hard to deal with him being so sensitive and worry that I might be doing things that make it worse because I'm really not the most sensitive person alive.