School gate

[Scamp48]

Oh my goodness, some tips please on surviving life at the school gate! I have just found out that some PTA mums have been criticising my involvement in a fundraiser but very much behind my back - one of them I considered to be a good friend. Another one eventually laid her cards on the table in a very dramatic email about it, the sort that leaves you feeling like you have been hit in the stomach. Makes me feel like avoiding any involvement with school activities and just concentrating on my own children's needs.

Any wise words? I've got quite a few more years to go before my children leave primary school!

"...avoiding any involvement with school activities and just concentrating on my own children's needs." I do this. Started off open and friendly, but there was too much gossip and drama, so I've changed tack and keep my head down now. Never felt happier!

God they sound horrendous. I'd probably not bother with them/fundraisers in the future. They sound like they have way too much time on their hands.

It depends why you were criticised.

I am on a PTA and once had words with a parent as she had run a food stall at a big event. It was agreed with her that she would make a donation at the end of the day depending how busy the stall was. She and her helpers from the pta were busy serving food through out the event and a similar stall run the previous year made about £250-300. She donated a tenner and kept the rest of the profit for herself.

If however you were criticised for something which was not your fault/not worthy of criticism then I would just leave them to it and they will soon realise that if they can't accept help graciously there soon won't be any.

Time to start a Bad Moms club. That'll learn 'em.

I think you need to clarify with whoever had overall responsibility for the fundraiser whether there could have been any misunderstandings.

Depending on what is in the email, a brief answer 'This account does not tally with my recollection of events. As I would not want there to be any misunderstandings I shall be talking it through with (overall organiser)'. And then nothing else on the subject.

And then either stop volunteering altogether for a while or stick to the role of helper on the day rather than organiser.