Oh no! In around 10 minutes time I am going to receive DS's school report!

[pinkchampagne]

I am not looking forward to it at all! I just dread school reports!!

I hope it goes well. i know how you feel. I think you had worries about your Ds's concentration something I am concerned about also with my DT2. Dt2's report is always glowing and that makes it a whole lot worse. Let us know how it goes

As expected. He needs lots of help, but his effort has come out as disappointing in all areas of the curriculum.
I knew it would tell me he was struggling & I know he has problems, but I feel very

Yes there are very big concerns with DS's concentration, maggiems, and I am at a real loss as to what I can do to help him.

sorry it was as expected. I hate that feeling , hoping that it wouldnt as bad as you thought but knowing it would be. DT2 has poor concentration too ans its really difficult to do anything about it. He has up and down days , for example yesterday was bad after had a really good sleep. he didnt have a great sleep last night as he has a bad cough but just wrote out a few small sentances correctly and concentrated more than normal. Tomorrow will probably be the opposite. I hope you feel better about it tomorrow and manage to enjoy the weekend. BTW meant to say DT1's report is alwaying glowing

sorry it was as expected. I hate that feeling , hoping that it wouldnt as bad as you thought but knowing it would be. DT2 has poor concentration too ans its really difficult to do anything about it. He has up and down days , for example yesterday was bad after had a really good sleep. he didnt have a great sleep last night as he has a bad cough but just wrote out a few small sentances correctly and concentrated more than normal. Tomorrow will probably be the opposite. I hope you feel better about it tomorrow and manage to enjoy the weekend. BTW meant to say DT1's report is alwaying glowing

Oops, sorry, my first time doing that

My Ds has up & down days too, but if he's not interested you just can't get him to concentrate full stop.
I really really don't know what I can do about it.
He is in year 2 now, and in that time he has gone from top table, to middle & now bottom!
His father won't even look at his report & I feel very tearful. I can't help but feel I've failed as a mother.

No advice, but much sympathy {{{hugs}}}

I think ultimately you have to remember it's your child's life, not yours, and you are not completely responsible for all they do (or don't). And Year 2 is very early days.

Thanks, Hallgerda.
Don't know why I'm so tearful. I pretty much expected his report to say what it did, as I know exactually what he's like - but seeing these things written down for you, can be pretty depressing reading!

Aw pc, please don't feel you have failed! As you rightly say, you cannot make him feel enthusiasm and commitment that he doesn't have, neither can you magic up concentration skills for him! You can provide encouraging support, and back up the teacher's position, and I'm pretty sure you are doing those things.

It must be hard not to worry but I strongly believe (not from vast experience, but I have worked as a classroom assistant and seen it happen) that as your son gets older he will improve. He will just do it at his pace and no-one else's

We had a few children who lacked concentration in the school I worked at, a couple were put on fish oil spplments and it did work to boost concentration levels, if that is any help

Thank you both for your messages.

He is shocking at taking medicines other than Calpol, so couldn't get the fish oils down him when I tried them, Sophiewd. He won't eat chewy sweets either, so couldn't even get him to try the chewy ones!

I am at a real loss as to what I can do tbh.

So sorry you feel like that. I dont feel guilty about the way my DT is but I feel guilty that I get cross with him when he doesnt concentrate, to no avail. I also feel bad because I should probably be going to see the teacher again but I have been putting it off because I just cant face hearing negative things about DT2 and am afraid she will say there has been no improvement.
From what you have said in previous posts you seem to be doing all you can for him and there is only so much you can do. Hugs from me too

I feel guilty because he has sloped right down in the two years he's been at school & feel I should have done more with him.
I have had a pretty stressful couple of years & much as I hear him read every night, I haven't maybe done as much with him as I should have.

I also have a friend and her eldest son who is now in year 4 had concentration problems, not working etc, her and the school came up with if he had a good week then he got a rewrad at the end, a small toy etc, something that he usually didn't get, if he had a bad week then no reward, he greatly improved hei behaviour!

Sorry me again, you can also get milk and spreads now which have the OMega 3 already in them.

Surely the school must bear some of the responsibility for letting things slide? Aren't they supposed to track pupils and notice problems like that, and deal with them? You shouldn't be taking it all on yourself.

{{{more hugs}}}

pc, I know it looks worrying but as Hallgerda says it is still early and there is plenty of time to gradually build up his interest in learning. FWIW I know plenty of people who didn't do brilliantly at First/Middle school but when it came to "A" Levels they got superb results and good degrees. I have an uncle who my mum tells me was always skiving, took no interest in school, was quite rude and obnoxious (not saying your ds is like that) and now he works for the UN.

Perhaps you will feel better if you make a plan to work with him more in subjects where he's struggling - have a look for online education sites, use workbooks etc. Would it be possible to look into hiring a tutor perhaps?

Well I have spent more time on Dt2 than DT1 because DT1 is more able and it hasnt made much difference. Dt1 is still ahead. After a day at school i find neither twin is eager to do much nor should they have to although to my shame I try and do too much with Dt2.So did he have any concentration problems in reception? My Dt2 has had them from day1

The frustrating thing is that he is a bright boy, but because of his concentration problems & inability to put it down on paper, he is not coming across that way in class.
He has always had concentration problems & there were concerns about him from reception age, although not concerns with his ability. He appeared very bright to them because he knew all the basics like sounds, numbers, shapes, could word build (his reading is still one of his stronger things) & had good knowledge & understanding.
I knew he couldn't maintain top group standards because of his lack of enthusiasm & his concentration probs.
By year 1 he had been moved down to the core group & there were again concerns about his pencil control, listening skills & social skills.
Now in year 2 the problems are more noticable & he is standing out from the others more & more.
He has been moved to the bottom table because he requires so much 1:1 attention.
He dislikes school & doesn't put himself out, but he has other problems too. I am pretty convinced he has dyspraxia because he has all the symptoms, although school haven't done much about getting him referred on to see someone, so I am trying to sort this myself.

I will get him some workbooks for home - that's a good idea.
I do feel I have maybe failed him over the last couple of years though.

Sophiewd - I do give them the pro-biotic drinks with Omega 3 in, and I also sometimes buy the bread, but not sure it is making a huge difference.

sounds familiar especially the listening skills - Dt2 is in a lower group that he could be if he concentrated better. From what I can see its very difficult in the early years to distinguish between those that have a real problem as opposed to those that are just a bit less mature and ready for formal teaching. You havent failed him over the last few years. The school sounds like it could be doing more.

I am going to ask to speak to the SENCO on Monday & maybe have a meeting with her & DS's teacher, as I found his report from last July & he wasn't coming out anywhere near as badly as he is now.
I am really very concerned about him.

that would be a very constructive and proactive course of action to take both reports and ask to see the senco. You could ask their advice and see how concerned they are about this drop.

It appears that DS's teacher is now off sick with stress & could be off for some time. Having lots of different supply teachers could prove disasterous for him.
Haven't yet managed to catch SENCO, but I am going to try to get hold of her this week sometime.
I'm getting really worried now.