Playground politics arrrrggghhh!!!!!!!!!!!

[mamalocco]

DD1 (7) has had problems with a 'friend' at school since reception. This friend seems quite controlling (play with me or I'll tell the teacher you're being mean to me type thing). I had hoped dd1 would learn to stand up for herself by now - she has other friends, but is only gets to play with them when friend is not at school for fear of upsetting her. Have discussed the situation with her teachers - they are fully aware of what goes on but not really sure what they can do. Both girls are in the same group in class and its difficult to keep them apart at playtime.
Fed up with dd1's take on school that day being wholly dependent upon whether friend was nice or not.
Is this just what girls are like at school? Should I just stand back and let them get on with it?

Can you try to develop those other friendships by inviting her other friends around to tea or getting her to do some after-school activities that you know this girl won't be going to? I think this sort of thing is quite common amongst girls unfortunately....

I think also you should speak to the teacher again and see if she can put them in different groups in class - even if they are of similar ability they don't need to be in the same group for everything.

Imo your dd is a little too young to be able to handle this by herself so I think you need to stay invlved in helping her to develop strategies for dealing with this girl...

Thanks - just invited another friend round for tea - great minds eh? My post was prompted because she was in tears about going to an after school club that friend was going to be at this afternoon. (Friend joins everything dd1 goes to - BECAUSE dd1 goes to it!).

It is likely the class will be mixed up when they go to the junior school in September - hoping they will be in different classes then.