Depressing school meeting

[WipsGlitter]

Recently had a depressing parent teacher meeting. DS 8 is drifting along, no commitment to working hard, not interested in reading, showed me a maths test he did where he got 26/50. Saw some written work that was riddled with mistakes - capital letters, spelling, full stops etc.

He's not stupid but he is just not motivated to work hard, wants to get through it all as quickly as possible to get on with playing with his friends. He had to do a project recently and started off ok but halfway through lost interest and was rushing to get it finished and just dashed it off.

She did make some suggestions for engaging him more in reading but I was nearly in tears. I just get the feeling the school is happy for him to drift along and keep making all these mistakes but never really help him focus more. It's been pretty much the same since he started.

I'm blaming myself. I work full-time and just don't have the energy to do more with him.

My youngest DD only works hard when the expectations of her are clear, I mean crystal clear otherwise school is just her social life.

We chose a secondary school that is pushy - because she is capable but need to be pushed!!

What makes your son tick? Once you've worked that out tell the teacher.

Hmmmm. Had a google. He fits some of the signs but not all. Food for thought.

For this to change, you and his teacher need to work as a team. Think about the situation and what you can put in place to help and what the teacher may need to put in place too. Ask the teacher for a meeting but don't be all blamey....ye are both in the wrong here but I suspect ye both want to make things better.
For your part, You say you didn't realise until the parent teacher meeting....you need to supervise and check his homework each night, and help him correct it if it is not right.

..you need to supervise and check his homework each night, and help him correct it if it is not right.

This is excellent advice.

He gets weekly homework and I do check it and get him to do it right. Even with lots of rubbing out

Was this parents meeting because they are a conveyorbelt..

I would suggest another meeting with his teacher..

Have you tried taking him to the library fr books, reading with him,

I did get distracted with your post with the Dan feckin TDM diary..I ggogled it and found google know who Dan feckin TDM was..lol...

You post reminds me of my DS who was diagnosed with dysgraphia this year..I alway knew he was capable of much more and since his diagnosis have had to adapt some of the ways I approach everything.

Yes it was a p/t conveyor belt!

We do go to the library but our local one just closed. Going to a bookshop tomorrow to let him pick some books.

And yes, another meeting with the teacher requested!!

Who asked for this meeting? Teacher or you?
Only because I actually agree with OP. Surely if there is an issue, strategies need to be suggested by teacher, even if it is only that mum talks to ds about motivation, not a shrugging of shoulders from teacher surely?

It was the schools standard first term meeting.

Update: had a meeting with the school that was more positive. They agreed to some stuff like sending work home but said he had been more vocal in class. He's also reading every night before bed.

They were at pains to point out he wasn't invisible though!!!!!

Op, having a disengaged 8 yr old doesn't mean he's not academic or that he won't do well. He is very young & may surprise you when he's older . Please try to go with his interests and things he loves, don't bore him with too much extra work. A few minutes reading every day is a good thing, ask him what he wants to read. My very disengaged DS used to read me cereal packet ingredients lists! And look at maps and atlases with me. He is a teen now and as well as continuing to love PE, positively likes history and geography, it's a real relief that he has started to enjoy & do well at some subjects, he's 14.

"My very disengaged DS used to read me cereal packet ingredients lists!"

My ds read me first aid manual once!