August born - how are/have they coped?

[Peculiarparenting]

Hello

My ds turned 4 at the end of August (literally). He has started reception now and seems to be coping with new routines etc.

However I am concerned that he is not coping in terms of emotional resilience with the new school environment. He has come home upset about people 'hurting his feelings' - his words. This is for a rangebif different reasons. Someone told him he had a big head. Another time someone pushed him to the floor. Another time a boy he thought was his friend told him that he didnt want to see his face anymore and wouldn't share with him.

For me this has been quite difficult to cope with as he is my pfb. I am seriously considering delaying his start to full days as I can see he is physically shattered and emotionally distressed (though not crying at the end of the day).

How have other people with children which are August born been coping this week? If you had an August born child what was your experience of reception onwards? At what point do they stop seeming so much younger then the others? Also if your child has had similar difficulties and is not August born how have you coped or dealt with it?

Any help would be much appreciated as I'm doubting my decision to start him in September.

I understand mrsmaynard. Hopefully when I meet ds teachers I can ask them.

If it were possible would you have deferred your August born child's entry to reception for when they just turned 5 instead of just turned 4? I would have accepted that option in a heartbeat if possible. I'm still contemplating it now to be honest as I feel socially he would have it alot easier.

my late August born son was tiny and exhausted in year R
but he weathered the storm.

He starts 6th form next week.

It will be fine.

I have two late August borns, a boy and a girl. Both were tired when they started, but other than that they've both been totally fine. I always think that holding them back a year in most cases would affect them more, as they'd be out of step with their year group and will have to catch up eventually anyway.

I do have one sensitive girl and one easygoing boy though, even today DD came out of school crying because someone had been mean to her at break time (and she's in year 6!!) I put that down to personality though, not age as my DS just gets on with things without getting upset by quite as much.

Incidentally I am also an August baby, and never noticed I was younger. My parents never mentioned it to me and so I just didn't focus on it at all while I was at school. I used to need a nap after reception though

I have a late August child.
It's never been a problem for him.
He's in his 3rd year at Uni now and doing well.
The only thing he's struggled with is relationships with girls. He has girl friends, but has never had a girlfriend, though it is not for the want of trying!

My other son is a June baby, and a very high flyer,j just started A levels.
My daughter is January, and also a high flyerand talented musician and at Uni.

I honestly don't believe it makes any difference...

Ds2 is late August, if I could have held him back a year I would have.
He really was still 3 (unlike dc1 who was further on at 4 yo)

Most of is class where September and October born with a couple mid year. So the difference was blatant.

Academically he slipped right in and was working in the top groups after a few weeks.

But it takes it toll on him emotionally and physically. He puts so much effort in to is work and holding his emotions together. That he's always tired. In reception and year one he was exhausted once he got home, with so many tears. It took him awhile to warm up to the dynamics of friendship groups, but he had quite a close friend that gave him confidence.

His peers would be going to clubs and sports after school but he was just too tired to do anything. Saturdays it was like trying to raise the dead.

He's in year 8 now, in top sets, but still has less umph after school. In holidays he has so much energy and can go and go, so I know its the amount he constrates at school that drains him.

If I could make that choice now, knowing its now available, I would hold him back a year.

If I could have held DS back to reception I would have done. I get why they have to have a cut off though...where would it stop?

Comparatively my Septemver born DD has thrived in school academically and emotionally but she is a very different child anyway but as people have said that year makes a difference.

I know it's not what you asked but I'm an August born baby. I start a PhD in October. Made no difference at all to me academically, socially, emotionally.

Those who got on ok academically, were your children noticeably behind or on a par with the rest of the class when starting?

Duvet
DS did not learn to read or write till late in year 1
then he caught up and some

My two boys , (28 Aug,22June) were ahead of the others, particularly my 2nd son, whose school nursery teacher said he had an 'amazing' ability to read.(He pretty much taught himself...I didn't actively teach him).
They were both academically ahead of their peers throughout their school lives, with 2nd son doing particularly well in his GCSEs this year.(enough to get his picture in the local paper!)
It is not the result of us being 'pushy' parents either, as neither I or or my husband or our parents went to University, and we do not have high flying jobs, though I am a TA , now. I've always just allowed school to do its job, and my kids to chose their own paths...they have never been near a tutor, and yet I never ' made' them do their homework/revision etc. All 3 of my children just got on with it.
Try not to be anxious about it, it will all work out in the end.

My ds is October born but he has ASD and is functioning socially and emotionally like a young 3 year old. So its not just summer born children in classes who will have issues.

Place marking, as DS doesn't start till next week but is a very young August baby. What worries me is that he isn't terribly articulate so may struggle to tell us/teachers about problems.

Another one with a 28 August baby in reception here.

OP, I agree with others who say the behaviours you mention need tackling and would be tough for children born in any month.

My main focus with DD is to ensure she knows she can tell a teacher if she something happens that makes her sad.

My DD is 16, only just. She got great Gcse results though. It's never been a problem until now. She couldn't work through the summer as most companies want you to be 16 and now some of her friends will be 17 and learning to drive. She'll have to wait until next August to start lessons.

DS, my PFB, is end of August birthday and now started Y9. I think it depends on the personality and emotional maturity of the individual child as I know other August born children who do very well and are socially and academically very well adjusted. My DS did well academically in primary but has increasingly struggled in secondary and I do feel that if he had been born a week late, rather than a week early, it would have been an advantage to him. But at the time he started school I would have been annoyed if he had had to wait another year as I felt he was ready for school - however I was only thinking about academic readiness and in fact his emotional maturity was always delayed and he would have been much better off starting the following year. I think being among the youngest in the year will, for my DS, be a disadvantage throughout his school career - but as I mentioned, this definitely isn't true for all August borns, it depends on the personal characteristics of your DS

PS like jamdonot's DC, my DS also had great reading ability and was reading fluently before the end of reception. My personal experience of the longer school journey has been that his emotional immaturity has gradually shown itself more important than his early academic promise, although I do know this is not true for all August borns.

I can give the " long view" my end July born is now 23. She had caught up academically easily by the end of reception - she was a 36 weeker Edd sept too. She would have been miserable as the eldest in the year below - you really don't know how it'll work out at the start. Best of luck to you both.