I'm already worrying about deferring just turned 1 DS

[Shantotto]

Can some talk some sense into me?! It's playing on our minds already as we are about to move out of London. Either Manchestwr or Scotland.

Now I like the ideal of starting school a little later as normal in Scotland. In Manchester, I'd have to fight to defer a year into reception, and even if that's given the ok, have to reapply for a place the following year I might not get!

Obviously I have no idea how 'ready' he will be, but I just do not want my son to start school at such a young age! If he was born a few weeks later he would have a whole extra year. I think school starting age of 5 is really young anyway, and as selfish as this sounds I feel like I am losing a year of us being together.

Does anyone have any thoughts / opinions : grips?

Dtds were due end of sept but were prem and born end of August. They walked and talked late so I was a bit concerned but they started school last sept 2 days after turning 4. They have reached all expected levels for reception and exceeded in 2 areas. I trust the school and work with them. A few reception dc did part time for the first term due to them not being ready so it depends whether school allows that.

You can start part time if you prefer and step up to full time later in the year.

Honestly your ds will in all likelihood want to go when he sees all his friends go. Dd is 4 with a January birthday and has had problems with her development and anxiety - but she is still deemed ready to go and noone has suggested keeping her back. She is keen to go anyway. I don't think keeping her back and spending a year with younger children would help.

School days are short and if you're a SAHP you'll still have time with your ds - and the holidays of course.

www.newscientist.com/article/mg22029435-000-too-much-too-young-should-schooling-start-at-age-7/

If you do investigate starting your son at compulsory school age (which is the term after 4) and want them to start in reception rather than being forced to skip a year and join year one. It's a real postcode lottery but some areas will approve all requests. It is the government's stated policy to change the law to make it possible for all summer born children to start in reception at age 5 check out nick gibbs (schools minister) letter on summer born children.

So no you don't sound like a lunatic... The government actually agrees you know best what's right for your child.

The OPs child is one year old no one knows what the future will hold.

My little boy is July born and attended reception mornings only for the whole year as I felt he was too young. We both loved it and it was a fab start for him. He has just completed yr 1 and it is soooooo hard compared to reception. If u feel 4 is too young then absolutely defer him. All these parents who say "my child is fine" have absolutely no idea how their child would be getting on if they had deferred. Yes their child may have been ok but why have "ok" if you can have "thriving" and "amazing" for your child??

Motherofdragons; part time is a parental right and has nothing to do with whether the school allow it.

I think there is a massive mis conception of what school at 4 is like. Reception in good schools is play based and a follow on from nursery. It's not sitting at desks learning. It's outdoor classrooms, fun games, socialisation and getting ready for proper schooling at yr1. They have a great time and hardly sit still all day.
In many countries where the school age is higher, the equivalent kindergarten is the same as reception and all DC go to it in effect.
At 6 or 7, school is then actually much more formal in some countries. Go visit some school and get a better insight. Read up on the subject.
It's actually possible to defer in Manchester anyway. A few at our school have done it. But are you deferring for you or your child?

Its not reception that you want to defer from its yr 1. Imagine a child just turned 5 being required to sit down almost all day for school work. Far too young imo for most children. Nice to have the option to go early but should not be compulsory. Personally would rather live in Scotland for lots of reasons (although to be fair my cc in England is pretty good and allows deferral for parental choice).

Neither the Scottish nor the English school system dictates the age at which a child must start school. Both dictate the earliest age at which a child may start state school.

As you feel that even five may be too young to start school, you could just home educate your son for a year or two or three before sending him to school at whatever age you feel is ideal for him. You don't have to decide in advance what age that will be. Wait and decide later.

I can only say that my eldest, with a 28 August birthday, and my youngest with a middle of June birthday have been absolutely fine, high flyers.(23 and 16 now)
I know the statistics say that Summer borns are supposed to struggle, but even in the school I work in, that just doesn't seem to necessarily follow. The class that just left us, to move to year 3, the most able child had their birthday 2 weeks before we finished. The oldest child in the class, a September baby, was a struggler.

I think you need to worry less about it, and go with the flow.Things usually sort themselves out on their own.

"So kids who take up the much vaunted deferring reception option are automatically barred from sitting the 11+ unless they"

The eleven plus makes allowances for birth date. Anyway in theory the 11 plus is non tutor able as its verbal and numerical reasoning. A bright year 5 child would not be held back. Maybe they should take and pass the 11 plus at the normal age and either skip year 6 or defer entry to the grammar school after passing the test in year 5.

"So kids who take up the much vaunted deferring reception option are automatically barred from sitting the 11+ "

No they aren't barred but they will be required to sit the tests at the correct age regardless of their current school year

Exactly what Smelly said. Reception is not really formal education at all- it's all play based. Other countries that start at 7 start with much more strict/ formal style education and that's just not what reception is like at all.

I have a September born and a (very late) August born, so I can see both sides. I do worry a bit about my August child, but equally, they could be completely ready and love it all- there's no way of knowing so I think it's best to not worry yet. There are lots of options to look at when they get nearer the to the school start date.

I know loads of summer born children who are absolutely thriving in school, it really is all generalisations which aren't that helpful to be worried about.

Surely it's not just down to age, you can help them be prepared. My dd is summer born, but we encouraged her with her numbers and phonics before she started school which I am sure helped her cope and not feel out of her depth. Yes she still seemed young in her class but she has certainly coped work wise.

I felt this from the start with DC2 and was right in our case. In your shoes I would move to scotland because they system there is better for summer born DC IMO.

No grammar schools in Scotland so no 11+

No grammar schools in most of England either

I agree that the problem is not Reception but after that. Particularly with the advent of the 2014 curriculum the expectations in Y1 and 2 are really high for a late summer born child.

My DS was fine to go into Reception at just 4, but he would have massively benefitted from 2 years in Reception before going into Y1. I would like to see this be the option, then schools could play an active part in helping parents to make the right decision for their child.

When is your child's birthday? If you say he's just turned one, then he would be one of the older ones in Scotland anyway and deferral wouldn't come into it. A child who born between 1 March 2015 and 28 February 2016 would start school in August 2020.

My dc is Feb born in Scotland so we had the choice and chose to send at 5.5. I have never regretted this decision (now 10.5). Puberty is so variable anyway that unless it hit especially early being a month older than the 'natural' year group makes no difference. It means they are not last to do everything (from going to Cubs to starting to learn to drive). But one of the big decision makers for me was the fact that all the secondary School teachers I spoke to said with boys always defer. They see a huge change with that extra year of maturity before hitting exams (girls are more variable). Of course there are always exceptions. I also know three children who moved to private school at secondary with the express intention of going down a year group because the parents felt they made the wrong decision not to defer at school entry.

The only downside of deferring was that all my mum-friends from toddlers moved on a year and I lost touch with a lot of them .

On the other hand, the Scottish education system is not that great anymore. Friends who have moved to England think the English system is much better. Reports of Scotland having great education predate the 'curriculum for excellence' and the SNP's government.

Reception year in school really is just playing and not much different (from a child's perspective) to nursery anyway. Move to the nicest place.