SEN child "managed out"; no schools want DC, what to do!?

[WTAFisgoingon]

DC has mild SEN (HFA plus a few other bits) and is basically a B grade student. DC has just been "managed out" of our private school as apparently they feel DC would be better with somewhere with more SEN provision. According to the various schools I have spoken to:

-DC cannot be catered for by the schools in the private sector as there is not enough SEN provision.

• In the State sector DC's SEN is too mild to stand any chance of qualifying for an EHCP so the local state school would be classes of 30 and fuck all provision.

-DC is too academically able and insufficient SEN to need a Special Needs school......

So everywhere I speak to is telling me that they are not the right kind of school for him! Home Ed is not an option either!

Does anyone have any advice? I'm feeling quite depressed by the whole situation. I'm so sad and appalled that nowhere seems to want to take / apparently be suitable for a well behaved B grade student with some issues.

I'd love to speak to anyone else who has been through this sort of situation?

The original post was from 2016

I can only speak to my own experience but there are quite a few private schools I know of with significant amounts of SEN DC. They don't shout about it but they're there. Best way to identify is to look st their ISI (equivalent of Ofsted) reports, which will be on their websites. Those give numbers.

Be wary of doing this. It may make it harder to integrate into the state system or secondary schools "out of year" later on. Other children would be similarly affected by lack of preschool during lockdowns. .

2 kids with autism one with ADHD as well both academically able and not ever in trouble. Eldest has just finished his a levels and is aiming for a Russell Group uni. He had support at school and 25% extra time in exams but no EHCP. DD is 16 just finished GCSEs and will do A levels, has an EHCP the school didn't think one was needed but that doesn't mean you can't get one just means you have to get the ball rolling with the LA. It is not true that a child needs learning difficulties. As it is DD needs meds for ADHD and she has a slower processing speed but she is able at school and is likely to get decent grades. State school has not held them back despite their struggles

Firstly, I would recommend starting a new thread and posting in the SEN section. There are some helpful and knowledgeable people there. I know your DS may not have SEN but there posters there who have had experience of being 'managed out of the private system'.

You say that his prep school is 'letting' him repeat reception. This may sound cynical but for them, that means an extra year's fees. If that's what you feel is best for your DS, you should be having conversations with the school now to find out what they're going to do next year to help him 'catch up'. What interventions/support are they going to put in place? Does the prep school have a Senco?

My concern is what is going to happen if your DS repeats the year and then the school still ask him to leave? That will mean he will be expected to go straight into Yr2 in another school.

Have you looked at state primaries? Yes the class sizes are bigger but they often have a lot more experience of SEN. There is usually a much bigger range of abilities which may suit your DS better? Don't necessarily rule them out.

Also just to say that IF your DS does have any additional needs, an EHCP isn't only for children with significant learning difficulties (despite what some schools/councils may try and say). I know a DC at a grammar school with an EHCP. My own son has one and he's working at 2 years ahead in some subjects. The point of an EHCP is to address barriers to learning (which could be things like slow processing speed/dyslexia).

Also, a DC doesn't need a diagnosis of anything to get additional support, it should be based on need. There is some good info here:

www.ipsea.org.uk/Pages/Category/how-should-your-nursery-school-or-college-help

We will have to take that chance sadly as he's just not ready yet to go up to year 1.

I really would not recommend him repeating another year as it is scabbing over rather than addressing the issue and what happens if it doesn’t resolve anything? I could have written your post a few years ago indeed I did, fast forward DS is thriving in state with an EHCP and a full time 1 to 1 plus we have named on of the countries best schools for Secondary where he is going to be so looked after. Save your money on fees and spend it on excellent expert reports to secure an Ehcp.

Thanks for your reply, this is reassuring! :) We know he's behind but what's confusing is he's actually performing advanced in his reading but everythign else is green or yellow. Handwriting is terrible he can only just write his name but with alot of practice and hand strength over the holidays I think we will get him up to a good standard so he's there this time next year to go into year 1. It's disheartening that the school mentioned managing him out at this point...we feel it's way too early to know frankly. We don't think he has anything wrong with him (and that's not just us being bias) other than being slow due to covid. He is a shy boy but again we think that might be because he feels overwhelmed as he must be aware how behind he is. If hes talking infront of the class he gets very self consious and jsut default answer is i dont know...but when asked 1:1 he oftern does know what the answer is!! I'm not sure if he has any SEN condition really but we'll find out when he's assessed. I just think its totally mad that the school is already talking like this when hes only just turned 5!

With all due respect how do you think most private schools achieve what they do? They shuffle out those that need too much TLC and keep the easier children who are likely to get good results for them.
Some private schools will give your DC the time they need but they are few and far between and might charge on top of fees for the SEN.
My mildly SEN child is thankfully now really flourishing in a good state school, so really don’t discount it!

30 in a class isn't always a bad thing. State schools tend to put a lot of focus on support in the classroom. My DD is in Y1 in a state school, 30 in her class, but a whopping 4 TA's as well as obviously the class teacher. No child is getting lost. I think you're being very cynical about state schools. Private school isn't always better!