What can your 6 year old boy actually do?

[makawaka8]

Can anybody out there share what their 6 year old boy can actually currently do in terms of reading and writing? I'm not a pushy parent or into hot-housing my child. If anything I think I might have been a bit too relaxed about school, thinking my DS is still very young and will just get there with it all. I have spoken to his teacher today and basically he is not making a lot of progress in terms of his reading and writing. She doesn't seem that concerned because he is clearly learning in a general sense but he is below expected levels. He is in year 1 and has just turned 6. He is honestly a very bright child with a great vocabulary and he can talk about lots of complicated things. He is very poor still at writing and while he loves being read to, he is just not bothered with reading. He is progressing but slowly. His teacher today did seem to imply that this can by a "boy" thing at his age, where they are not as interested in sitting down and applying themselves? Now I'm wondering if I have been too laid back about it and should I be concerned here. Would anybody be willing to share what their 6 year old DS is actually able to do?

ChalkHearts, op says he is in yr1 and just turned 6.

How's often does he read to you at home?
I listened to my children every night. Keep it short to start with. Does he have a comic? If not I can recommend it for boys who are reluctant readers. When reading to him( really pleased you spend the time doing this) chose some books that you can read together. Get him to read a sentence then you read the rest. Try books with characters speaking so you can both make silly voices. He'll love this.
There are websites listing books boys might enjoy. Do you take him to the library? A regular visit and some of the activities offered might help.
Lots of parents let school deal with reading but actually it is a two way thing. If you get on board now he will soon be where he should be. The writing will develop when the reading does. Getting him to draw and colour will help develop fine motor skills so will things like modelling with clay or plasticine, playing with Lego or Steiner beeswax, cutting with scissors. They need to do these activities in order to strengthen the fingers. Tracing, stencils etc are good. You can get dinosaur ones my sons loved them and drew different backgrounds for them.
If he is reluctant to read to you make it fun and have a little snack/ treat available.
I have four children and read with all of them. The first and fourth were reading fluently by the end of Reception and both were reading books years above there level the other two were average. The first is still an avid reader about two or three books a week the fourth mainly reading to develop skills from her degree. The second suddenly started reading novels about 5 years ago before that he only read autobiographies. The third boy doesn't read much at all. He was the weakest of the four. I hope this helps.

DS was very much the same. He's 7 now and I do notice him reading without an issue when something comes up that he wants to read - text in a video game or whatever. He used to ask me to read long chunks of text to him but he seems to find the quicker to read by himself now.

Also we are in Germany where he started school for the first time just before his 7th birthday and they really didn't even expect them to be able to write their name. They went through the alphabet one letter at a time for weeks it seemed. It's much more relaxed here about reading but it seems to work well.

DS is 6 & also in Y1. He started Y1 unable to read & suddenly it clicks & here we are he's reading fairly complicated words, road signs & stuff off the TV. If you'd said to me 6m ago we'd be here I'd have laughed.

Maybe he just needs a bit more time & it'll click for your DS too.

Keep trying

My DS2 is youngest of 3 - the other two are top sets (eldest just got into superselective/top academic scholarships offered etc so super academically able and not just based on the judgement of our school ). Neither could do all the things Art and Co's son could do at just turned 6. Her DS is easily surpassing expectations at that age so he's probably very able, and the school's approach (with all that homework) is probably very achievement driven. It's not par for the course in Year 1.

There is a huge range of "normal" ability at this age. If the teacher is concerned, what do they propose?

I have a DD in year 1. She is August born though, so a while to go before she is 6. She is considered to be above average in reading and literacy, but she is nowhere near Art and Co's son!
She is reading purple band at school and her writing is getting better gradually. Her letter formation isn't great, but her spelling is good. She finds it painful to hold the pencil for too long and I wonder if that's why her letter formation isn't good.
She is not so great in maths, although the teacher says she has no worries so far. She can count in 2s, 5s and 10s easily, but she doesn't always apply this in adding up numbers, instead trying to count on her fingers...

She gives up easily, and has a can't be bothered attitude generally, will cry if even slightly pushed to do something (has been known to tare up, scribble all over her homework in a rage if asked to do it), so apart from reading, everything else is a struggle so we don't tend to push her much.
She is an excellent cyclist, an amazing hoola hooper and reads music pretty well, so we leave her be -)

My DSs are 6 in Y1. They're on white band, not the highest in the class by a long shot but that's above average in most schools. Their writing has until recently been really awful. It's improved a lot lately and is quite nice WHEN they try. They're good at maths, not very sporty.

Ds2 turns 6 in July. He's top table for Maths and phonics work (to give you an idea of where he is in relation to rest of his class).

He reads simple chapter books at home but is still working his way through the school's reading scheme, think he's on Orange or Red band. He reads 2 books a night. He writes very neatly, not joined up though.

Maths, he can count in 2,5,10 to 100 and knows concept of multiply, divide. Homework is once a week, couple of pages in a workbook and another set piece which can be written work or producing artwork or doing a project etc.

Op don't panic about what Art's boys are doing. I'm sure I remember from her various posts that they are in private school, and based on the homework and class levels she has detailed I would assume they are in a London based and fairly intensive prep school environment? (please correct me Art if I'm wrong but I'm sure I've seen posts along those lines from you before). They are therefore absolutely NOT representative of your typical Y1 child at all. (In fact even if they are in a state school they are not representative of your typical child). Just in case any other posters were getting seriously freaked out

OP I have a 6yo in Y1 who is also nowhere near Art's child in current work level but is able to read fairly fluently and write pretty well and picks up number concepts quickly. However, he's a second child and Autumn born which I think makes a huge difference.

DS1, now in Y7, is summer born and struggled massively in both reception and Y1. By the end of Y6 he'd both caught up with and overtaken some of his cohort and now has both reading and spelling age significantly above his chronological age. At this stage of y1 he was reading ORT 4 and could barely write a sentence. Now he devours books and has just got glowing feedback on an essay about Tennyson

Please don't worry. Keep encouraging your boy, practise little and often, make it fun. It'll come.

Diet - sorry, the op asked what our 6 years olds were roughly doing. Therefore my answer was based on my child, and my child's class in general. I'm afraid I have no other experience of other school class averages to compare to as don't make a habit of seeing what every other child in England can or can't do.

Artandco, I don't find it particularly helpful when op is asking what normal 6 year olds are doing and you answering about your gifted children's attainment at great private school. You can talk about all you like on relevant thread, even on primary board when they talk about high fliers, but this...?

He isn't a 'high flyer' as far as I know he is average for his class. How am I supposed to know if that's not average at another school. He's a normal 6 year old

No of course you don't, Art, I didn't mean that.

I was just trying to reassure the op as your responses clearly unsettled her. And a bit of context (ie that your DC are in an academically driven private school) would have been helpful in your responses because the kind of school they are in makes a massive difference to a child's achievement levels at this stage. There's a huge range of 'typical' for Y1, you only have to read these boards occasionally to realise that.

How do you know he's average Artandco? Discussions with parents at the gate or the teachers telling you he's average?

At the same age, DS struggled to read and his handwriting was illegible.

He's an avid reader now - one of only a couple in his class doing a book reading challenge and his handwriting is OK - not great but legible.

I felt at the time he was frustrated by how boring the books he could read were and so he wasn't getting anything out of it. When he finally got fluent and could read interesting stuff by himself he was off.

I'd have a problem with the teacher describing it as "a boy thing".

So that makes it ok? Boys are behind in reading so don't bother putting in any effort. I know, separate the class by gender so you can teach the boys more advanced maths, and the girls can learn pretty writing.

This ingrained stereotyping from teachers is not on. The message to boys is they are bad at reading because of their penises, so theres nothing they can do about it, so why try?

Fwiw both my girls struggled with reading and writing, but were slightly ahead in maths. They only really picked it up about yr 3. I reckon it's mainly because biff and chip are so fucking boring, and the interesting books were beyond them- hence liking being read to. Once they were able to tackle david walliams/harry potter etc they caught up very quickly. Dd1 is yr 6 and got top marks in all her literacy in her sats (level 6 is it?)

Dancing - the teacher send homework daily. It has easy, average and hard levels. She ticks what he is supposed to do based on what he knows in class. They also have a tables in class based on approximate ability, I know he is on the middle ones. Which to me indicates others must be above ( and below obviously). His school isn't selective and he has children with additional needs in his class also

Sorry for my spelling, I am foreign!

If you think your dcs are average, why do you talk about them on G & T board, Art?

She's got you there, Art!!

My 6yo dd in y1 is a free reader now, and doing 2, 5, and 10 x tables at school. Homework every night. She's in private pre-prep.

My ds (now nearly 9yo and y4) was in state school at the same age. He got homework once a week, and it was nothing like the level that dd now gets. I can't remember exactly what his reading was like at that age but it was prob stuff like Biff and Chip, and was nothing like dd's (she has just started reading Alice in Wonderland to herself at home). She is ahead of average at reading I suspect, but I don't think at anything else. And though spelling good, she also has dreadful handwriting! And now ds is 8yo he's reading basically same as his peers - Tom gates, Harry Potter etc.

The point is that there is a massive difference in what is taught at private and state schools. In y1 ds was doing number bonds to 10. Times tables weren't done till y2 iirc. He is now gifted at maths, but didn't show it at 6yo. (He also has ASD and is in some ways showing a profile of science geek so prob not totally reflective of the norm!)

So what they're doing at 6yo really is no reliable indication of innate ability. Please don't worry. It's much more a reflection of the type of school they're in and what they're taught. Private pre-preps are geared to the 7+ entrance for prep schools. They are eg taught things like basic non-verbal reasoning not because the children are 'advanced' but because it's part of the 7+ assessment. State schools don't waste their time with this!

My god I realise my post looks like total bloody boasting - sorry, didn't mean it to come across like that at all (and having a son whose development is nothing like the norm, I am the opposite of this really, honestly!)

I was just trying to say that a) no point comparing what is taught in private to what is taught in state, as it is no reflection on ability, b) that at y1 your ds does NOT sound 'behind', and c) being 'ahead' or 'behind' at this age does not necessarily mean anything.

My dc are at a private prep, which is a very high achieving school, yet the majority of the kids in yr 1 still aren't doing what artandco reckons her average child is doing.

If you think your dcs are average, why do you talk about them on G & T board, Art?

I've posted about my DS who is in Yr1. I have concerns but he has lots of flags waving alongside the things he finds difficult.

I have a bright and obedient DD. She is an excellent reader no doubt. I was still really worried when she was in YR and Yr1. Because I don't go around asking all the other parents what their DC can achieve. And frankly, teachers won't commit to any firm description of a child's ability.

She's a bit too meticulous and if her writing isn't just so, she'll rub it out making more of a mess.

She was achieving a lot more than DS a lot earlier. But he has had much much faster spurts than she ever has. I was so worried about him catching up. I couldn't see how that would be possible. But now I'm seeing glimpses of it.

Admittedly his writing is terrible. He has some real issues with fine motor, more than "just boys". He is getting some help and he is just about reaching an acceptable bottom standard for YR1 in writing. But his reading is exceptional. He's on level 9.
He language has always been exceptional.
His maths is pretty average and no better than his sister.

I think a worried parent is a good thing, keeping tabs on average, average for your middle class school or average for your borough etc.
But worried is pointless if you don't at least try to put effort into your children at home too. When I do that, I see results and that's very reassuring.