DS is autistic, and we have regular meetings to discuss his arrangements and progress. He's very bright academically and masks well, so school don't see a lot if problems (home is another story, tbh). Because the school already give him a lot of extra time, and I already know how he's doing, I actively refuse parents' evenings, as it seems a way I can try to lessen the staff's workload. But someone has told me that this is rude; the staff will see it as my not being bothered to make the effort, when they make an extra effort for my child all the time. I should stress that I come to class assemblies and class parties, which is when we see their work - parents' evenings are solely about talking through the child's progress with teachers, and the way I see it, my being there would just add yet another 15 minutes to their already very long evening.
As a teacher, would you appreciate that, or would you think I was ungrateful in only taking up specific meetings about the My Plan arrangements, and not bothering with the more mundane parent feedback stuff?