Deferring reception until legal age...help!!

[Sobloodyworried123]

Please can someone advice me who is more knowledgable than me!
We made a late application for reception due to a move and today have been offered a school just under 2 miles away, graded 3 in the ofsted report last year and the overall provision, clubs offered and outdoor space is poor.
We don't have the money to go private and legally he has to start by January as born in October, I also have another son due in reception next year so will need to do his application by January 15th so the safest thing to do ( seeing as the last school offered was 6 miles away ) would be to accept it but defer until January so no disruption to him if another place arises ( we are on 8 waiting lists and number 1 at our closest ) however the head was appalled by this suggestion when I mentioned it to her today.
She suggested it was at the schools discretion even though the admissions team stated it absolutely isn't and they have to allow it.
Am I right?
I just don't think it's fair to start him and take him out if a place arises whereas if nothing has come January then that's where both him and younger sibling would attend, off all waiting lists etc.
help!

Just start him . You know ideally he won't be there long term but at least it is local and he will be able to get into a routine. I'm not sure what deferring would achieve as it seems unlikely a better place will suddenly appear if it hasn't already. Maybe ask to start after half term as a compromise. It would be unusual for one of the eldest to start later in the year, although you may have the right to do so. I suspect all this angst is preventing you and your dc2 settling , and at least with some sort of resolution you may be able to.

Are you on Facebook? There is a very knowledgeable & suportive group there all about delaying school admission until CSA

Hi, the waiting lists are moving and to be number 1 on a waiting list seems hopeful.
He has settled really well, both kids have as have I to be fair as we know the area well, it was only 2 years we left for!
I don't want to start him now as think it is really unfair for him to get settled only to remove him, he is aware of going to school and looking forward to that but understands we are waiting for the right one.
I will of course send him to this one in January if nothing else has come up but I want to do that with my heart in it, not whilst hoping for something else as once he starts my youngest sons application would also go in and that would be the end of it!

But equally your Ds could fall down the list if say a sibling of a child accepted into another year group appeared or a child living closer. Being first is only any good if no one else appears and a child leaves. Lots of "what if" scenarios. Are you happy to apply for this school for ds2 or will you list it behind your current 1 & 2 preferences in the hope of securing a place there and thereby sibling priority on waiting list for ds1?

I know you're worried about this, but why keep starting new threads? You've had some really good advice on the dozen or so other threads you have started about this, why don't you keep it all in one place so people can help when stuff arises?

Sorry for not posting on my other threads, I don't know if it's because I'm using an iPhone that I can't find the threads I'm on as when I click on that tab nothing comes up? Not sure if they're deleted as they're non active etc.
Completely agree that we don't have long to wait, had he been a summer born may have more of a shot but only realistically have 3 1/2 months for it to happen.
I don't think I would start youngest somewhere else just so eldest gets priority as again a child would still need to leave ( and in year 1 by this point so even more unlikely I fear ) and than be stuck juggling 2 school runs for the next however long so my intention is to apply for him wherever eldest son is by 14th January and that's that done!
I didn't think friendships would be that established in a few months of reception, maybe I'm wrong? I've had a few friends who have been in my position and said if anything the new child was made a fuss of by the other children.
I have got a private tutor starting with him next week who we will use twice a week for an hour to go over phonics etc as his concentration with us isn't brilliant and he's quite ahead emotionally so I can't see any major problems with him starting a little later other than the friendship groups mentioned now.

By the sounds of it he is more than ready to start now. If he is emotionally mature any later move shouldn't be an issue.

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/2468823-to-be-shocked-that-a-primary-school-fence-is-only-4-foot-high

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/2468941-to-decline-an-offer-of-school-place-that-was-3rd-preference

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/2465477-to-have-got-the-reception-application-all-wrong-please-help

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/primary/2465564-Can-I-appeal-even-if-theyre-allocated-me-one-of-my-prefernces

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/primary/2471897-Class-size-change-through-primary-age

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/primary/2468983-Defer-or-refuse-Confused-what-rights-are

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/primary/2465669-Ive-messed-up-reception-application

All there if you can't find them and need info.

Thankyou ever so much that's really helpful.
He is ready I guess I just don't like the thought of a later move but I guess there's a negative to him starting later if there is no move to be had. Decisions!!! 2 miles is a lot better than it could be though, walkable with them on bikes etc

Aargh you got me confused and I posted a reply on one of your older threads!

2 miles isn't a huge distance. At least by starting him now you'd break this seemingly endless cycle of worry. If ds2 applies for your preferred school/s and gets in, does this school have a breakfast/after school club to enable you to manage both school runs until ds1 can move, or is there one of your preferred schools . Could a friend assist (you have plenty of time to arrange) or failing that pay a childminder. However maybe this will have resolved itself in a year's time.

Add this and those threads to your Watching list so you can monitor any future responses. On the mobile site the navigation buttons are at the bottom of the screen.

No friends are stay at home parents in my friends circle actually so that doesn't work and there is no breakfast or after school provision.
I'm reliant to fight for a school based on younger child as could end up with doing a juggling act for years couldn't it :-(
That's why I thought wait until January and if no better offer accept that's where they both attend and have done with it, it's not secodary and even though ofsted is a 3 rating the key stage 2 results are all 85% - 95% achieving level 4 or above across the board which I read as good although have no teacher experience myself.
I'm sure it could be a lot worse in the climate we are facing with school places, I just wanted him to have as less distruption as possible.
This move knocked me for six, it was so unexpected for the landlord to sell up, I've chosen his school, he had his school place, I was happy with everything and then bang this happened, has been a lot for me to take on board :-(

You should just start him and move him if a place becomes available. A school that is your third choice is better than no choice at all and you might end up in a school in special measures 10 miles away in a neighbouring borough if you give up this one.

I think you will get fewer and fewer replies, the exact same posters have replied on your 9 previous threads.

I really don't see what you have to lose by starting now. If the situation hasn't changed by January you apply for this school, if a faith education is still important to you you'd put those first for ds2 then this one and find a way to make both school runs work. There probably is asc but it may be externally run, by a local nursery or ymca for example. You have almost a year to make new friends/neighbours who could potentially assist or you find a local cm for an hour or two a day. You seem crippled by inertia!