How do I handle this tomorrow with reception teacher?

[dinny]

Briefly, dd was pushed over at lunchtime on Friday by a girl in her class (who is frequently disciplined at school). Girl (X) tried to grab dd's skipping rope, then when dd wouldn't give it to her, she pushed her once, then again, so dd fell over. Dinnerladies hadn't noticed this (according to dd and dd's friend), and dd was lying on bench crying an holding tummy when a bigger boy (year 2) came up and hit her twice on head (on purpose, according to dd, by accident, according to dd's friend)

dd's friend ran to get dinnerlady, who came and comforted dd and then took her in classroom to lie on carpet as she was upset and said her head hurt. dd's friend said X wasn't made to say sorry (and wasn't sure what happened to the big boy).

anyway, none of this was relayed to me when I picked dd up on Friday, it was only when we'd got home she told me what had happened. I am so cross I wasn't informed - ffs, they gave me an accident form when she'd just fallen and grazed her knee!

so, my question is, do I speak to her reception teacher tomorrow (I plan to do so) and what should I say?? - am worried I'll just get really worked up, need to plan what am saying. can't even think what I want done, beyond said asurance it won't happen again. I realise incidents dohappen in the playgroun, but feel dd was v vulnerable at that point.

or should I speak to head? (fwiw, this boy has a reputation as a sod)

thanks for reading, Dinny

bump

Well if you are worried about getting het up - why not write a note to the teacher regarding the incident and put it in dd's book bag.

Teacher will probably then take you to one side when you pick dd up from school later that day

dinny, I hope your dd is feeling better soon, bless her. As far as she is concerned, arm her with strategies on how to deal with other kids if this happens again. As far as dealing with her teacher goes, I wouldn't make a huge deal of it tbh. Just mention that dd said so-and-so-blah-blah and would she keep an eye out in case it happens again. And if it does, then that's the time to make more of a stand about it imo.

This could just have been a one-off (I hope it is) as far as your dd is concerned - only need to get more concerned if it keeps occurring. Good luck.

this boys reputation has nothing to do with anything.

i wouldn't get too angry about the fact you weren't told as it is quite probable that the teacher herself didn't know, if your DD was ojk by the end of lunch.

I don't think there was much that could have been done really as the incident happened some time before the dinner lady arrived.

BY all means ask the teacher if she new of the incident and say that your dd was a little upset by it, she may say that yes she was aware and she has spoken to the girl already.

basicly stay calm and remember that accidents happen at home when its just you and your own kids so you can imagine how difficult it is with a playground og 150

Fattymumma speaks wise words! Unfortunately as teachers don't go out on the playground at lunchtime they don't know what goes on unless midday supervisors tell them . In this case I would voice your concern about lack of communcation betwee mds and the class teacher explaining that your dd was very upset by the incident.

oh, I know, it's just so hard to not overreact...

ahem, forgot to say that when dd had told me about it, I did call school to try and catch her teacher, but got another class's teaching assistant, (who I know quite well) and she said she'd let dd's teacher know I'd called. God, bet they will think I am totally neurotic (I am!)

Just felt like she'd been ambushed by two kids, iykwim...

should there have been incident report or is that only if first aid is administered?

Not sure about the incident report. Just try and take a step back, go in, ask what the policy is for reporting incidents if you want to know, tell the teacher what happened and try not to cry or use the words 'my precious baby', you'll be fine!

pmsl, danceswithmonkeys! too right! dh just pointed out I am totally OTT and worry about everything far too much. can't seem to stop panicking about everything atm

When my DS was in reception last year, we were walking home and another boy saw my DS and said "Mummy XXXX(my son) hit me today" his mummy coed and spoke to her son. I then said to my DS "have you been fighting?" my son was very put out and insisted it was not him in fact it was the other way round. I went straight back into school and saw the head teacher and asked what was going on.

This other lad had had a difficult start to his school life and was always hitting and kicking (and the odd bite).

I left it with Head to sort out (she instantly told me what had happened and informed me that it was totally one sided and my DS did nothing to provoke the attack and other attacks (I though "attack" was a bit strong but it was her words ) The other boy was hitting my DS on a regular basis!

I went to see head again after a few days and I was a bit emotional (we are allowed to be these are our DC!) I pointed out that if I got DS up and told him that at some point during the day I was going to hurt him I would be reported for abuse yet by allowing this other lad to hit him everyday I was infact doing just that. I also said that I really liked the school and its staff but I would remove DS and home school him if this wasnt sorted.

She took my comments very seriously and although the other lad didnt become an angel he is getting help and a lot more supervison.

Sorry for the long ramble just wanted to tell you that we have had this situation to and speaking to the head did get some action.

Good luck and let us know how you get on

God, sounds v difficuly, Busybusymum.

Have asked dd and she said it's the first time the girl in her class has pushed her and that the older boy hasn't bothered her before. Hopefully it's a one-off. Really making me feel a lot better to read your posts, thanks v much!

Sorry to hear she had a rough Friday Has this happened before ? Do they monitor the behaviour of the first girl ?

I don't think they fill in an accident report unless they have to treat something. Even then I wasn't asked to sign anything when dd needed a cold compress on a bump on her head although I did get a chit of paper detailing it in her book bag.

btw looked for you a couple of Mondays ago - the day they were in one of the classrooms (ds' last year one !) - but got waylaid last week.

LIZS, now, not happened before. That's what I want to find out - I think their teacher is always sending the girl to sit out etc as she is (according to dd) always in trouble. What do they do these days with children who persistently upset the others?

We've swapped out ballet day back to Sat - was such a rush! You around then?

hey, have you seen there is a house for sale in G with R? Not sure if it's your thing but it's a great location....

Lockets - just popped down to grill dh...

He says if sole agency, negotiate them to 12%. Also says most agents will muck it up and thinks you should self-manage (says he more than happy to steer you through it, give you contracters etc, if you like)

Otherwise, 12% (10% to let it, 2% to manage it)

yes, he does. will msn you his work no if you haven't already got it, just give him a call tomorrow.

Oh that's a shame we're not up there on Saturday's atm and have just had it confirmed that dd's Modern class will continue on Tuesdays for the Spring term. Can understand it was a rush for you though.

Do you mean the house up on the Linden estate or is there another I've missed ? There was a listed one near the green advertised but not sure exactly where it is and whether it was big enough.

Message withdrawn

LIZS - it wasn't listed. Maybe have a look on findaproperty, maybe it wasn't on with R....

Rickman - I have just spent 30 mins peering through fence into playground! saw dd and she seemed OK butshe did seem a bit on the periphery...she's so lost without her best friend (who has gone to another schol)

it is so worrying, isn't it? your poor ds. what is the mum of the bully like?

still waiting to hear from dd's teacher - she said sh'd either call me or se me after school.

Dinny - I would be pissed off too.

I'd def have a quick word with teacher as your dd was very upset - maybe you could ask what she would suggest you say to your dd so she is prepared for if it happens again.

i'd say that I was concerned that the girl who grabbed the rope wasn't told that it was not allowed and ask if she can be kept an eye on - surely thats what supervisers are meant to do?