Please help. What to write in letter to school - unresolved bullying

[DefinedByMyMagic]

My DD (year 2) is having issues with a girl in her class (this is the second school year that it's been happening in).

I've informally had a chat with the TA on the school door in the mornings, I've been in and spoken to the class teacher, I've written to the teacher, I've spoken to the head of KS1 but nothing has been resolved.

The teachers have a talk with the other girl and things are ok for a week or two but then slip straight back again.

Would you write to the head now?

I spoke to the teacher again this morning and asked if the girls parents had been contacted and she said she didn't know if they had!!!!

It's got so bad that my DD doesn't want to go to school, I have to physically peel her off me and hand her over to the teacher in the mornings and even then she runs down the corridor after me.

DD is constantly making excuses of why she can't go to school (tummy ache, sore eye etc). She's not sleeping at night and is waking up throughout the night.

What would you put in a letter to the head? From other posts I gather that I need to mention the schools duty of care and for a copy of their anti-bullying policy.

Thanks in advance for any advice.

I would.

I would also expect the teacher to feed back to the Head about meetings they've had with parents.

You've asked the teacher to help and she's not shown any long term attempts. Therefore, talking to the Head is called for. I would meet with the Head rather than write.

If this has been going on for more than a year - I wouldn't be writing letters. I would be marching to the Head's office with my husband and expecting to hear what the school is trying to do about it.

It is simply unacceptable.

(To make the conversation productive, I would write down the key points and facts I'd want to discuss - the main issues, what you have tried, what the teacher has done, and the result. I tend to get emotional in these conversations, and my husband is much better at it)

I would say to the head, if it's not resolved, other schools will be looked at.

I would send an email to the head detailing the incidents of bullying behaviour. Include a timeline and list the contact you have made with school so far and what the response has been

Then enquire about what strategies are in place to manage the behaviour.
Quote bits of their anti bullying policy or behaviour management policy (should be available on school website).

Tell them that your daughter is distressed and isn't wanting to come to school. Request a meeting with the head in order to go through the points raised in your email.

If you aren't satisfied with the response, escalate to governors (ie send head a further email copied to governors)

Have you got the school's bullying policy? If not, get it now, check whether they have complied with it. If they haven't, ask why not and ask them to confirm that they will do so immediately.

But, to be honest, if I were you I would also be looking at other schools. If this one isn't prepared to get to grips with a bullying issue I'm not sure how much faith I would have in it anyway.

I'd also be using, in both written and verbal comminications, the fact that the school are failing in their duty to safeguard your dd - I think that's the right phrase. And make sure you start to copy the governors in too.

I seem to recall from other threads on here that that is the phrase that kicks their butts into gear and means they have to do something - or face consequences if they don't.

And then ask them what they are going to do as a longterm plan to safeguard your dd from the bully and ensure that she doesn't have such an awful time at school - she has a right to an education and they need to ensure the bully doesn't deprive her of that.

Good luck.

Thanks all.

I have now got a copy of the anti-bullying policy. They have followed it so far but I'm now going to contact the head as per the 'in the event of continued problems' part of the policy.

MM I tend to get emotional face to face and can't get my words out.

I will update when I get a response.