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Primary education

Join our Primary Education forum to discuss starting school and helping your child get the most out of it.

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Original poster

Children signing consent forms

18 replies

Psipsina · 22/04/2015 10:47

Just a quickie really. Was sent a letter before the hols stating ds (who is 7) had been selected to take part in a reading club before school three times a week. We can't manage this as it's too early (had a thread on it already as I felt bad about it) and so I sent back the form saying I do not consent.

There was something on it for ds to sign as well, I vaguely recall - I think it said 'I agree I must attend this club on time and it is very important' or something like that, which I ignored as he wasn't going afaik. And anyway, it wouldn't be up to him if he got there on time as he is only 7.

Anyway yesterday he came home saying that he has to be there today, at 8.45 (which is our usual time to get to school, so that's Ok) and that he had been made to fill in the rest of the form, with his name and his signature.

I am happy for him to go along in school time but I don't understand why he was made to sign the consent. He can't be there 'on time', and furthermore I resent his being asked to sign something he doesn't necessarily understand while I'm not present.

It's a little thing but it is the principle I'm not sure of. He has no signature at his age, anyway.

Also I'm worried that it will now look as though he really wants to attend and I'm not letting him, or that we have agreed he will attend on time and yet we shan't be there at 8.30. So it makes me look like a bad parent.

Any thoughts?

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glittertits · 22/04/2015 10:57

Doesn't matter what it looks like to the teacher, he can't go. End of story. Your word trumps.

His 'signature' is surely just something twee that the teacher has done to ensure each kid knows about the club? Ie, sign to prove I know about it/have read this.

It has no bearing on whether or not he goes, and he is certainly not obligated to due to a 7 year old scribble when your permission slip says no.

soapboxqueen · 22/04/2015 11:04

I think your reading too much into it. It would be an odd situation if the school said "well yes we know you said he couldn't go but we have his signature here, here and here and expect you to uphold his commitments"

It's quite common for schools to ask children to sign behaviour or learning contracts. Often at the beginning of the year and parents get to sign it too or a separate parents version. It's all just symbolic to encourage children to take responsibility for their own learning.

The school may have decided to start this now or because of some additional work going on within school.

Original poster

Psipsina · 22/04/2015 11:10

Yes I'm sure it is just a minor thing yet it makes me uncomfortable as I don't understand the point of it - either it doesn't matter if he signs or not, and therefore he shouldn't be asked to without me being aware - or else it does matter and therefore I should be there when he signs it.

Bit confused is all. I might mention it when I collect him. As I said I don't have a problem if he is sent to a club during school time but we cannot attend at the start as the gates are still locked till 8.40 so I presume I'd have to walk him the extra bit to the school office and ring the buzzer, then go in with him, which would necessitate us leaving half an hour earlier, which is not possible.

Thanks for the replies.

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soapboxqueen · 22/04/2015 12:01

There is nothing he can sign that will "matter" in any real sense.

Original poster

Psipsina · 22/04/2015 12:06

Ok that's good to know.

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Heels99 · 22/04/2015 12:08

Why can't you leave half an hour earlier?
Does he need extra help with reading, do you support his reading at home?

drspouse · 22/04/2015 12:12

Conversely, though you can deliver him to take part in any school activity, if he doesn't consent (the term for under-16s is often "assent") through his words or actions he won't be taking part anyway.

E.g. if I take DD for her 2 year check and I say "yes, that's fine, go ahead and check her development" but she sits on my lap mute or screaming for the whole session she has not assented to participate despite my consent...

Or if your DS went to the session and refused to read a word/stared out of the window/ran round the classroom pretending to be an airplane, he would not be assenting...

Original poster

Psipsina · 22/04/2015 12:15

He is happy to do it. He couldn't understand why his signature was required though, and tbh neither can I. I will check with his teacher if I see her later.

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glittertits · 22/04/2015 12:16

Yes actually soapbox, I had forgotten how common kids signing things is. Our school has all 11 year olds sign a learning contract to agree to the school rules ahead of starting year 7.

Original poster

Psipsina · 22/04/2015 12:18

We have the home-school agreement but I assumed with a club type of thing (which isn't actually a club at all) and a parental consent form being sent out, a child's signature would be totally immaterial.

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Original poster

Psipsina · 22/04/2015 12:19

Btw Heels, with respect all that was covered on another thread some time ago and I'd rather not go into it all again. Thank you for asking though.

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JWIM · 22/04/2015 12:46

Just speak to the class teacher and ask for an explanation about the purpose of the club, the timing of the club (start/finish), your DS's involvement. I have a DS aged 15 and he can still be 'vague' about arrangements even though we practice this on a daily basis.

Heels99 · 22/04/2015 12:47

Oh sorry, you brought it up!

Original poster

Psipsina · 22/04/2015 13:37

Yes, just for the purposes of filling in some background. Sorry for any confusion.

Thanks JWIM, I'll ask and see what she says.

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Galena · 22/04/2015 13:52

I didn't read your previous thread, so apologies if this was covered, but it sounds like this is some sort of targetted booster session before the SATs. If it is, then they will want all the children and parents to understand how important it is that the children attend regularly and on time - it won't be a 'nicey nicey' club, simply for fun.

They have helped you by allowing him to start later, but still they want him to realise that it is important that he attends in the correct frame of mind.

RunAwayHome · 22/04/2015 13:57

I'm sure it won't mean that he's obliged in any official sense, but it's probably more to give him a sense that the club is thought to be important, he has to make a bit of a effort to try his best at it, etc. - more just the idea that he is committing to something and that it does matter. It's not that anyone can hold him to it. I know that sometimes children are asked to sign something saying that they will aim to practice handwriting/music/reading etc. three times a week. With young children, the teachers know perfectly well that it's the parents who will be doing the encouraging and finding the time and reminding etc., but at least having the children sign it makes them aware that it does matter, that they can try to remember, that they could ask for help in practising, that practising is important, etc, so that eventually, as the years go by, they will be taking more of that responsibility on themselves. It helps avoid the situation (that I have had), where 16-year olds say "I didn't practice this week because my Mum didn't remind me". Or "I don't have my books for my lesson because my Mum forgot to put them in the car". Or "I didn't come last week because my Dad didn't tell me to go". It's all just a start in encouraging them to take responsibility and to see that the club or the practice or whatever is something they have to put some effort it, even if there might be times when it is hard. And it can encourage commitment, especially if it affects others doing the club (like for drama or music or team sports), or if others haven't been chosen to do it because of numbers. No one is going to come after them if they do miss something or are late or whatever, because they know it is often not of the child's doing, but it's the start of realising that what one does can affect other people (and lays the groundwork for clubs that will impose sanctions for non-attendance as the child gets older, like not playing in the concert or on the team, or the place being given to someone else).

Original poster

Psipsina · 22/04/2015 14:39

I can see the value of teaching them that it is their personal responsibility to learn, of course. But it isn't all the children, it's just a few apparently.

Galena it may be a SATS related thing and I could understand that but if they want to put across how important it is, they might have been as well to explain it to me instead of wording the letter as though it were a fun club type of thing.

Maybe they have low expectations of parents and we're seen as the sort of people who will respond better to 'you have been selected for a special club, what fun' than to 'we have SATS approaching and would appreciate your cooperation in ensuring your child is up to scratch. We have provided some extra teaching time', etc etc.

I signed up for the school day in good faith and don't want to be in a position whereby longer hours are required. I haven't actually had a chance to speak to them about this at all yet as the letter came out at the end of term.

So I'll try and corner the teacher and have it out properly

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Swimmingwithsharks · 22/04/2015 18:01

Return the form but rule a line through the part where he says he agrees etc.
if it's SATS related then I would find it poor that the teachers can not teach the children sufficiently in the school day. If they need extra coaching then that high lights their inability to teach well in school hours.
Remember SATS is a reflection on the school, not your child.
There are however some parents who like to get their children to swot up for SATS. And a lot of parents welcome extra work out of the school day for their children. You may feel under pressure for your son to attend these classes, but you can also withdraw him. ( the school might not like it, but tough). I think you'll find that you are in the minority and other parents will love it and yes, the school will pretend it's this great club that the kids will love. Don't expect to get the full picture from them if it is SATS related.

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