My 8 year old daughter is being teased at school because of her name?

[elsie1970]

Hello everyone,
My eight year old has been coming home from school very upset almost every day last half term, and now its getting near the summer term starting she says she doesn't want to go back. I know usually people do not share names on this website, but because that's what the questions about I'l tell you that her name is Kendall. I asked her why she didn't want to go back and she said "all the boys in my class laugh at me and say Kendall is a boys name." She then told me that she wanted me to talk to her teacher because she is embarrassed. I feel she is usually very confident and will try to sort out the problem herself, and that is the only reason I'm a bit worried that this is something more than name calling,but she wont't tell me. I've also had her eldest brother talk to her too, but nothing. Should I investigate further or just tell her class teacher she's having a problem?

Yes, but the teasing at the OPs school has been going on for weeks, and we don't know that she has been crying "at the drop of a hat".

There is a lot of, "oh it would stop if only the OPs daughter would do this or that." Are we blaming the victim?

But it's been going on for at least half a term.

I'm speaking as someone who was bullied for at least four years constantly. I never cried at school, was clever enough to have some witty retorts. I was told over and over again it was me and my behaviour - I never knew what I was doing wrong. The bullies were never pulled up for being cruel.

Also - surely the very stoical and "cry babies (for want of a better expression) are at the ends of the spectrum. Most children are in the middle.

THere is a Kendall on dance moms. I have never heard it used as a boys name. Talk to the teacher but let her keep her name rather than changing it which only lets the bullies win.

Anything a bit different will get picked on. Ken-doll, Ken, Kenny from SouthPark, she might have to get used to it and laugh it off. That or give her a nick name first. I think you have to seriously think about how you name kids these days and what they can get changed into/teased about. She will be fine when she is older - but you may have to think about way to combat this it doesnt sound like it will go away othewise. My name was changed a bit and kids do get teased over names, teased about red hair. Speak to the teachers to nip it in the bud. Goodluck.

I also had the most dreadful surname that lent itself to a very unflattering "nickname" for ALL my school life!!! It really depends on how you define a "victim" and how you build up resilience and friendships so it no longer matters what a few people call you. If you don't, you will be a victim for ever and you really, really, do not want that to happen over a name because you rarely get to change it. In my case it got dumped when I got married. I used my middle name, not my first name, from age 11 as I said earlier. Plenty of children are stoical and do not let others grind them down. I never complained about what I was called, except to my Mum, and I was told there was nothing to be done. My name was my name. I learnt not to give a XXXX about what I was called! Constantly rising to the name calling is not the way to go because it encourages the name calling even more. I really do sympathise with the OP, but I do not think her DD should consider herself a victim just yet. That status can last a lifetime.