Playgroup ASBO

[Bambino1972]

Hi, my 29-month-old daughter has been going to Playgroup two days a week for four months. She loves it and I think it is a good one. However, she still refuses to sit for snacks (she is not a snacker so simply doesn't want to ) and today they have said that since she continues to throw a tantrum when being made to, it can't really go on. She is the only one out of 12 children who won't sit. While I understand, they can't allow her to do what she wants when they have 11 other children in their care, am I being unreasonable in being a bit upset that I face having to remove her because she doesn't want to eat an hour after her breakfast?

Hi, thanks for all your input. It has been very useful. Just to clarify, I only gave her age in months because I thought that is what people seemed to do on forums, not because I think of her as a baby at all. We really should not read too much into everything!
Since her behaviour in every other way is fine, I am inclined to believe they are being a bit extreme but I do understand they have to do what is best for the group.

We've recently been looking round preschools and nurseries for DD who is rising 3, and not one of them had a regulated sit down and eat your snack time. Snacks were offered, they made sure each child had had a chance to come and snack if they wanted, but if not they just carried on playing.

Regimented snacks is not a necessary thing. Maybe you'd be better off finding a more casual style playgroup.

(Thinking about it, DS has got to Year 1 in school without ever having compulsory regimented snack time.)

If the provision receives 2, 3 or 4 year old funding then it cant exclude a child for this. Do they?

I was wondering about having breakfast earlier and making it smaller on nursery days. The nursery staff do have to provide 1:1 on occasions with children so they are being very unreasonable about this. Also, children often will join in when they are left on their own to think about it. Why can't she be ignored and not made to have a tantrum? Children, in the end, like to be with others, doing what the others are doing. If she thought there was something exciting on the table, I bet she would join it.

I think it's shit.

She's not yet even 3. She wants to play & understandably so. Also, again the emphasis on snacking. There is another thread at the moment saying snacks are bad & we shouldn't encourage snacking.

Poor girl isn't old enough to understand.

I'd move her myself, Nevermind them kicking her out.

My DC went to a playgroup similar to insancerre's with rolling snack, children were always offered snack but not forced to take it. It doesn't sound like a very good playgroup and I would move your dd if at all possible.

Do they do a circle time or any time where they sit down without snack together, and if so does your dd sit down then? My friend is a nursery practitioner and says that the children who come from playgroup sit nicely during group activities, and to her that would be more valuable than always eating a snack.

I am a CM and don't think the pre school response is great.

This is pre school not school. Been school ready means been able to sit listen and follow instructions not at 2 and a half...

I would not be changing meals around if she doesn't usually snack but eats well other times.

I would ask them how they intend to manage it.. I find the insistence she has sits and has snack very over the top. They are almost creating food issue

I agree with PPs. At the school where I work, in Reception (i.e. children twice your DD's age) snacks are offered but there is no set snack time.

I think they should give her a book or small toy and say she must sit quietly while the others have their snack. Or have a drink of something. I don't think it's the not eating that's the problem it's the not wanting to sit still. It's worth trying a smaller breakfast as someone else suggested. But I thought we were all supposed to be getting out of the habit of snacking for the sake of it. Doesn't seem common sense is being applied by the leaders of the playgroup.

I agree totally with viv

I'm with everyone else. It sounds far too inflexible for a not even 3 year old. This is well within the normal range of behaviour that they should be able to cope with.