Thank you notes to classmates

[scrumper]

Hi - am not sure what to make of this but DS burst into tears in playground when I asked him to give out 2nd half of the thank you notes he'd written to classmates for birthday presents (too frenetic to open them during the party itself so he opened them at home).

Turns out his classmates made fun of him for writing. One of the nicest ones - or so I'd thought - even mocked him right in front of me.

Am I completely out of touch? Or should I tell a teacher - and what would they do anyway? Feeling like a bad mother for putting him in this position.

Really? Have never come across this before. My kids always write thank you notes after their parties and they generally get them too from other kids. Why on earth would anyone make fun of a kid for writing a thank you note?! How old is he? I might have a word with the teacher - maybe they need to cover common courtesy in class!

DS is in a mixed year 3 and 4 class at a little village primary so we aren't talking big cool kids. Thanks for saying that Auntie, am worried I'm out of touch for encouraging him, maybe I'm not such a fuddy duddy after all.

My son always gives out thank you notes too. As he got older I did relent a bit and let him send ones usually with a picture taken at the party done on the computer but always naming the present so as to acknowledge we knew what they had kindly bought. You are raising your son with manners. Others sometimes don't have manners. My mum now goes as far as not buying nieces etc who don't send notes presents anymore and if their parents mention they didn't get anything this year she tells them why!

I didn't write thank you cards for the children's last party and still feel bad about it. I can think of only one parent round here who hasn't thanked the kids for birthday gifts (mainly because her child tore them apart in a mad frenzy so i'm sure no one had any idea who had sent what!). totally normal to send cards.

I don't get DS to do thank you notes, but he does be them from other children. He doesn't even register getting them tbh!!

We don't do them as the present giver will get thanked at the party. We rarely get them back either

I don't make the dc's write thankyou letters to school friends.

I expect him to verbally thank them at the party for coming and for helping him have a good time, and for the present. Then, I usually text all the parents individually for the gift and will sometimes attach a photo of their child at the party.

I have sometimes received a written/printed thankyou from child whose party my cd attended and it's always gone on the wall in our kitchen as I love anything like that and am very appreciative of the effort gone into it. I would take a very dim view of anyone being mocked for this, and possibly would have a quiet word with the teacher.

We always write and usually receive thank you notes from school friends.
We also go through the pain of writing thank you notes for Christmas presents. MY DC detest doing it! but we do insist, as it really annoys me when people don't thank us for gifts.
I do think it will become a thing of the past.

Well the school rang me this morning because DS still upset - he's usually in a happy group so it feels like a big deal to him - and I explained what I thought the matter was. Staff member supportive. Waiting to see what comes of it. Thanks for the perspective everyone.