Advice re teaching Reception year child to write

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Its only a few weeks into term and DS is having some problems. Im keen to try and ease his anxiety.

One thing he struggles with is writing. This isnt the cause of his anxiety but wont be helping. He has always been reluctant to engage with any drawing or writing activities at home and preschool. He thinks he cant do it and has been very critical of his art. This saddens me and I cannot figure where his feelings come from.

He once wrote his name fairly accurately but never again since. I hoped school would motivate him and being with peers increase his confidence and willingness to give it a go. Its early days but so far this hasnt happened and its not helping his anxiety.

I am wondering whether i should sit down with some form of reward system for practising letters (for the effort not result) as this might give him the confidence to be more co operative at school. I hate rewards charts etc, esp re learning, but i wonder if it would give him a boost.

Many friends have hothoused their kids over the summer but Ive always assumed he'd get there in his own time. The last thing he needs is to feel pressure out of school but I think his fear of not being able to write is making his behaviour difficult when its time for writing activities.

Does anyone have any thoughts or tips re getting a child writing? Esp re making it fun? Thank you.

I think a lot of young kids panic over doing and find the explanations complicated. I found Joy of Handwriting (a PDF programme that has print and cursive version and can print just what you need) great at breaking everything down in simple language and at only half a page makes it a lot less stressful for all involved.

I'd let it come naturally to be honest. Might be worth working on fine motor control e.g. by threading beads, buildling Lego. Also consider mark making in other contexts e.g. sand, flour ...

I'd personally say that hothousing a child that doesn't want to is counter productive at this stage. And how on earth will you make him do it if he doesn't want to anyway??

I agree with working on fine motor skills outside mark making activities to make sure his hands are ready for success, then encourage mark making in other ways, chalk on the walls outside, etchasketch or aquadoodle, gently moving him onto writing more formally when he has confidence and is likely to be rewarded with an instant feeling of success.

Enjoying it, or at least not disliking it, in reception year is so important

My DS also found drawing and writing hard, and only got started with either once he was in Reception. Second those saying try other fine motor control activities.

One thing DS liked when he was getting started was tracing over letters. School sent a sheet of the alphabet in the handwriting style they use, with arrows for directions, which we photocopied a few times for DS to practice on. We also downloaded a font that matched it and I would print him out colouring pictures with the word in dotted-line or outline font underneath for him to colour/trace - he found colouring in less intimidating than actually drawing. Then when he was getting better we'd have space to write the word himself with spacing lines too.

DS writing came on in leaps and bounds over the reception year, and he's caught up with his peers now I'd say. Still can't draw much but he produces interesting and intricate doodles so it's not the fine motor skills holding him back at least. So don't panic, lots of them find it hard at the beginning!

Leave it to the school, at least while he's in Reception. I didn't do this and it was a huge mistake, just caused upsets and arguements and probably inhibited his progress if anything. Lots of 4/5 year olds don't have the muscular control (core, shoulder, hand) to write easily. Fun activities that encourage this control to develop are a good idea though.

My DS aged 4 is similar and he would never choose to do art or any other pencil related activity. But I have discovered that he likes doing mazes and will ask to do those, and he has also been known to do a dot-to-dot here and there. It might be a case of finding something he does like, or a theme he likes and working with that.

Those cbeebies/other preschool magazines might be a good place to start as they have a lot of different activities he could try and you can see which he likes and then run with that.

Thanks. Chalks on black paper etc has been fun but we've done very little of any of this recently. (Apart from lego which hes mad about.) Ill try making it fun again.

I would generally agree with responses but im concious now that my approach may not have served him well. One particularly bad day this week the teacher said she couldnt get anything more out of him than one letter and in the end got him to write 5 "a"s and let him finish. I was quite taken aback by this approach.
Its not what i was expecting this early.

DD is 4 and just started reception. I've been thinking about ways to encourage her to read/write as well but have not found any productive ones yet tbh. She loves drawing and doodling and painting etc but cannot write her own name yet. I've tried to encourage her at home but she just wants to doodle. Agree with what most people have said I'm leaving it to the school. Mind you there is a parents evening coming up so I'm very interested to see what she has been doing at school so far. I've just learnt to be patient with DD she has always developed in her own time from giving up dummy to potty training to learning to talk/walk. I guess what I'm trying to say is each child is different & mine is extra stubborn

I would back off.

My ds is like this and I find I make it worse because he really wants to do well for me and I inadvertently pressure him without realising.

But if say DH or someone gets involved with him, he is fine.

Since backing off, I've not initiated any writing with ds at all. He's been in reception for 3 weeks and is picking up pencils more and trying to draw/write. I don't say a word when he does, not even look, and he gets on with it!

If you have an ipad then the app blobble write ( i think that's what it's called) was very popular with the reception class I worked in last year.

I would also say to back off and leave the name writing to the school but do lots of fun fine motor skills activities at home - Lego, play dough, stickers etc. and activities to build his shoulder strength and stability - drawing on the floor in chalk or water and the same while standing up on walls or on an easel.

My DS was very reluctant to draw or write anything until around 4.5 when suddenly he started to. But I found he loved wipe clean books and will happily spend ages doing mazes or simple puzzles as long as he can then wipe it all off afterwards. That really got him going with wanting to hold a pen or pencil.

my DS wouldn't try writing for ages because he said it couldn't do it, his teacher ended up getting a white board for him so he could rub out what he had done before anyone saw it if he wasn't happy with it, now his confidence is up he will write on paper as well

There are apps for phone and tablet....pocket phonic is good. This can be seen as fun and they practice writing letters as well as sounds. My little girl who was reluctant to write enjoyed it. Also try making shapes in shaving foam or sand can help. Doing circles and lines not actual letters may be a start. Best of luck....but the way my daughter caught with the help of a good teacher at school in Y1. Remember it is not a race. ....even though some parents think it is

To give him confidence get rid of any thought that writing is the alphabet as we know it. Writing is mark making. Praise any mark making and say 'good writing!' As others have said, do it in different media, not just pencil and paper. Do it yourself alongside him. Just make lines and squiggles and chat about the 'shopping list' or whatever you are writing. This will boost his confidence and when he is ready he will start to form letters.

Writing, mark-making, drawing or map-making is best if it has some purpose that the child can understand.

Thus, can he create a 'map' of his bedroom, showing items of furniture, and maybe writing the initial letter of each item.

Or 'write a letter' to his favourite teddy, or some other toy or animal.

If you have a tape recorder, or some device that will record him talking (many phones will), can he 'dictate' a story to a younger sibling, or to teddy. When I had VERY reluctant Yr2 writers, I would let them dictate their ideas to me and I would type on the computer to their dictation; once free of the chore of pencil and paper, their ideas just flowed out.

have you read raising boys by Steve biddulph? he explains that boys need to work out gross motor skills before they can grasp fine motor skills, so i would encourage lots of big painting chalking on floor and board, having a bucket of water and painting the walls, going to the beach or muddy puddle and drawing with a stick? you need to make sure school are not piling on the pressure as this will only put him off!

I agree with others, this is something that will come and the school will know the best strategies. My DD learnt to draw a face by using one of those drawing boards (a bit like an etch as sketch). I used to hold the end of the 'pen' and she held the bottom and I would guide it round to draw a circle, so we drew it together. Gradually she learnt to do it herself. It was nothing to do with writing, but this kind of activity might help develop the motor skills and getting away from just pen and paper makes it feel less like school.