Have huge problems with this since the start of school & we have just moved into yr3.
Basically DD & her best friend often play with the class bully - when she is nice they are all fine, but more often than not she will divide them and be mean to one, resulting in the other being peacemaker between the two. The bully is mostly verbally nasty, but can be aggressive as well. We, as have the other parents have spoken with the school, who acknowledge that this child is very difficult and that they are always watching.
Several things have come to light recently - the other parents have effectively banned their DC From playing with this child, (something we were reluctant to do especially as We have been the parent of the unpopular child as DS has SEN) and as a result this has heaped the pressure onto our children to always play with with her, as they don't want her to feel left out..
The classes were split, and the issue was made worse by moving my DD out of the class, into a new group of well established friends, so now she feels like she has no friends in the class. Her best friend has now been given instruction by her mum not to play with the bully, and is busy networking her child into new friendship groups, all of which is confusing my DD.
How have I got this so spectacularly wrong? By teaching my child a degree of empathy, I have actually succeeded in isolating her. I didn't expect to have micro manage her friendships, but she seems caught between a rock & the proverbial hard place.